<body> Lost In Beauty-
they`re beautiful__*


hello_! darlings.<3

welcome to the suite life of

syasya cum dada & fafad

.aka.

pWeNcEz** & cinderel-LAH_

sya`s first cry - 7teen.NOV.9teenEIGHTY9 -

fad`s first cry - twenty7.MARCH.9teenEIGHTY9 -

bosomBUDDY, euu may call us =)

crankyLADS, euu may label us

love us, HATE us? euu decide

okay bye.

note:

like it, u stay

if not, see that cross on the top right hand corner? leave

.despise us - - i don`t care

.hate us - - it`s fine

.love us - - we share

.betray us - - ur done

.iTs OUR blog. Our say- -

.what WE feel, we write - -

.eu have got NO right to stop us from splilling everything - -

.buzz OFF if eu dont lyk IT - -

.WE dont need EU to bitch about US - -

.Misunderstood, im being judged by my looks,- -

.even before i introduce, im hated on, they think im rude. - -

.they call me names all the tyme, tryna pick fights. - -

.i aint into that, just cause im quiet dey go on and talk behind my back. - -

.what i gotta do to prove myself, we all got imperfection in ourselves, - -

.To make the best of my life is what ill do, hate it or love it, i'll always be true, - -

.if yall doubt that than it proves that yall shallow fools. - -

.So, ill say wat i wanna say, do what i wannna do. - -

.If you aint feeling that then FUCK you. - -

ad0res__*


FAMILY
Friends
EACH other company ((:
Sya: Dearest sayang <3s!! Abg wawaL- Fad: Him.
Mp3
Music and music and music
Handphones
Computer
Eyeliner
Lip gloss
Sya: tWo.FIVE.zeRO.two.ZERO.six and the list goes on.

`FADDIE`S_

glasses.

THAT converse shoe.

THAT kappa show.

baby G watch.

deep red perfume

good results.

stop failing.

happy life.

THAT billabong top.

<flip flops.

.W800i.

More pants.

More shirts.

Sya: That converse shoe-, THat pump shoe in BLACK, ThaT pump shoe in any other colour
Sya: That WHITE slipper, That WHITE/GREEN slipper, That PINK/WHITE slipper Flip FLOPs- ((:
Sya: That GREEN, PINk, wHitE TOP. ThaT lOnG-sLeEvE. That sLeEvELESS top. Grr.
Sya: That DENIMS. ThE BLACK pants. ThAt PANTS you noe i noe. ((:



other beauties__*

syasya&fafad
 faddie <3
 syasya <3
 shiffa <3
 shaz <3
 nasrul <3

...EXIBITIONS


 March 2006
 April 2006
 May 2006
 June 2006
 July 2006
 August 2006
 September 2006
 October 2006
 December 2006
 March 2009
 April 2009

...BEAUTITALK




 

...Lost in beauty

layout design, coding,  photo-editing,

by syasya&faddie



 Brushes- 1| 2

Friday, April 10, 2009


Ive been contacting a lot with the dearest bestfriend of late. These kind of communication was long missed. And we're getting the hang of it anw. Oh, did i mention that i was a little pissed off because she distracted my sleep yesterday.! GRR! And i thought it was something urgent. So, i rushed out from bed and called her using my house phone.
Syasya: Yes. What happened? Fadiah: Oh, nothing. Just want to wish you good afternoon(or something like tt)
It was -____-"
Because firstly, i was damn lethargic. Maybe i was travelling too much with tuitions. Haha! But thanks uh, i still entertain her crap. (:

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, March 24, 2009


I AM SO GLAD THAT THIS BLOG HAS COME AGAIN! THANK YOU NURSYAHIDAH! look at the date, year 2006! OHH YO HO HELLO THERE, syasya :)

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


I didnt know which navigations i clicked on but i could get my hands on this shared blog, finally! Anw, there's so many things here that made me feel all nostalgic. I will read all of the drafts when im free. Oh, hello Fadiah. (: ___syasya

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, December 04, 2006


LOL. This entry is written by syasya. Yeah pardon me for hurting any party. :) So i plucked my courage to type this out. These days, ive been thinking about this. I just cant seem to get an answer. Seriously, i miss one fcuking brat like a lot. Okay he`s not a brat larh. Like duh. He`s none other than mrBoyfren. Yeah.

>But ironically, asl kite not like other people ey. I mean. What`s the use of having a relationship when u have got no time for her. And even if eu have the time, u spend it with ur other clicks. I just dun understand. At one moment, eu said ure not allowed to go out. The next moment i noe is ure out with some other people. Tell eu. Its bored. Its bored leading a relationship like this. Maybe its because of the age thingy, the time, or whatevernots. I don`t feel that i belong to eu. Nah. Trust me. My relationship with my other guy frens are much3 better. But we`re just frens. TELL me. R eu like this in ur previous2 relationship. Coz majority of mine is not like this. Never. We talk. We contact.

I never come across a relationship llike ours. Maybe i am demanding. But the least u could give is a little attention. Yeah. Trust me in this k. SYasya really lacks the love and care and attention from a boyfren. Like wth. Im no desperate gerl for all those stuffs. I have enough supplements from my other guy frens. But come to think of it. Syasya is really pathetic uh. Ade balak ey tapi tak rase mcm. Kwang3. Im just wondering. Y do i still hang on although i noe that the cycle will repeat itself again. No. At this point of time, we tak fight or whatsoever. But i just wanna fite for my rite.

For nine months plus. Our life has been like this. Love towards eu, i dunnoe how to explain. True, i have that feeling for eu. Love, perhaphs. In my opinion, theres others who can give me all that. But wei. I still holding on to you. And that ring a bell in my head that i have strong faith in eu. But eu prove me that we`re leading one shallow relationship. This point of time in my life, syasya really3 can choose sb who can make me happy. Nah. But i cast all that aside. I wanna eu. Yes eu. Coz boi, i miss eu damn lots. Whenever i wanna make that move to ask eu. I will feel very reluctant. Whenever i see eu infront of my eyes, those hatred, grudges vanish into thin airs.

Yeah boi. Ive been blinded by ur sweetness all these while. I realised that. &that sweetness will make my legs wobbly and melt. My ego will melt too. &tt`s wen thgs repeat itself. It will be sweet for a while. Just a while. And all those stuffs are at my fingertips. I dunnoe how much longer i can hang on. But whatever happens. I hope. I want a change from eu. From us. Maybe some others can be comfortable with eu. But it`s okay it somedae this will come to an end. Im just glad that we survive thru all this and our paths meet. Seriously, its nice knowing eu. Ure the 1st for me to entangle in a relationship with somebody youger. It will be an eye-opener for me. But age doesnt matter. Eu tot me that.

Hmm. Enough said. I hope we will change fer the better. I love eu larh sei. But ure one lucky chap. Sb loves eu a lot. A lot. A lot. N tt sb is me. Yeah. But we shall see how as time passes by. Tkcr love.

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, December 03, 2006


faddie n syasya
nice? LOL
NPCC. Minus shaz. :) Syasya miss him badly-

the beauty exposed ;



Halo. Halo. Has been long since i blog here. HUrhur. So anw. School`s over. Yeah. Prom was fun for me. :) And i got to noe loads and loads and loads of new frens. Yeah. &jupJUP too. He`s hawt sia. I had fun these hols. And i tink kan. Syasya dunnoe lei what to do with my relationship. Mcm boring sei. How eh. I wan him to noe. hurhur. But well. &fads happy with hers. Thk gawd. K laa. I have to go alrd. Fad. Blog here ok. This blog is in coma. . . . Hoho. Ciao.

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, October 12, 2006


ahh. finally. the touch of the keyboard. stupid blog. i can`t sign in at MY OWN blog. damn it. fortunately, this blog saves me. i`ve longed so much to filter everything out but stupid computer was spoilt and for two whole weeks, i had to bear with life without computer. i have so much to say yet so little. let`s cut it short.
SCHOOL IS OVER. sadly. there were people tearing and at the same time, having fun taking photos =))nevertheless, everyone shall always be remembered. ms farah`s words truly touched our hearts. she, too, teared along with us. she went something like "and now, i have to cut the strings to ur kites. ."
class 5A prepared a little something for our beloved form teacher for 3 whole years, MS CHEONG. we wrote farewell notes and compiled it and handed it to her. her facial expressions cannot be described.
enough said about that.
yesterday i managed to not go to school. but hey, i went to downtown to study okay. and i did. thou it`s only 2 chapters. AT LEAST. somehow, i felt that yesterday was a sinful day for me. honestly. shall not drag about it.
today. i woke up at 7 for school. darling grrlfwens waited til 7.45 for all 6 of us to go school together. imagine walking into the school at 8. cool. hoho. there won`t be another time anymore. after school, everyone quickly reserved whatever they wanted from the cozy corner. and there were people like syahidah, who took the sofa. lol. pity farhi thou. but it`s a good thing he gave in. heh. so syasya has a new sofa. it sure will look nice cos it`s FREE. lollies. so i managed to grab the pillow. that`ll be something i shall be nostalgic about. memories with 5A. ohh how i love the class. we must keep in touch okay people. *hugs* so anyway, there was physics mock exam and i was so sleepy that i slept. i didn`t know my head tilted to one side and islin had to kick my chair to wake me up. lollies. i was tired lorr. excuse me. soon after that, darling grrlfwens went to changi to break fast. i apologise to poocan for scaring her about the cat thingy. hoho. i was deeply embarrassed when there was a cat and i jumped onto a chair with shrieks from all of us. we sure had fun. then we headed to the beach for a while and left. i was agitated by then. argh. okay bla bla bla. reached home. shaz, about what happened in the bus, hush hush okay. it was nothing larh. something played back in my mind. i`m fine now =))
okay. faddie`s tired. i so wanna enter my blog. MUMMY!! shoot me.
ehh. i miss him lorr.

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, October 01, 2006


Hapi advanced 16th BDAE sayang!!

the beauty exposed ;



Hapi advanced 16th BDAE sayang!!

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, September 26, 2006


the beauty exposed ;

Monday, September 25, 2006


Its been long since i blog here. But anw. Fad. I appologised fer not comin to skel. Bu babe, i miss eu sweets. =))So anw. Fad. I wan to dedicate to eu one song.. Check it ouut soon ok. Either at my blog or ours. Thx fer everything k. I love eu as much as i love myself. <33.>

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, September 16, 2006


okay. great. i lost my previous entry. stupid fcuk. so anyway, this blog has been long dead. fcuk larh. i`ve written such a long entry. mofo. shithead. waste my bloody freaking time. okay cool. so anyway, faddie went to the beach with him in the morning. weee. yes, i had fun. =) blablabla i sent my sister to the mosque and met shaz. we went to downtown. supposedly, we suppose to meet darling grrlfwen syasya at 3-4pm. but then, yes, after such a long wait for like one and a half hours, she wasn`t there. who doesn`t get tired waiting for someone? arg. so yes, we left the place at 4.30. okay, i did call her home but don`t ask what happened. only darling shaz knows. hoho. secret okay shaz. hmm. i`m at my friend`s place. yes, FOOD. that`s what i`m here for. hoho. i`m planning to meet syasya later at night. can we can we? ohh. we neevr fail to meet at night whenever i`m here right? lollies. okay. i hear food calling my name. later.

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, September 09, 2006


I don't mind spending some time Just hanging here with you Cuz I don't find too many guys That treat me like you do Those other guys all wanna take me for a ride But when I walk their talk is suicide Some people never get beyond their stupid pride But you can see the real me inside And I'm satisfied, Even though the gods are crazy Even though the stars are blind
If you show me real love baby I'll show you mine I can make you nice and naughty Be the devil and angel too Got a heart and soul and body Let's see what this love can do Baby i'm perfect for you My love, I could be your confidante Just one of your girlfriends But I know that love's what you want If tomorrow the world ends Why shouldn't we be with the one we really love? Now tell me who have you been dreaming of At night at home? ___________________________________________________ i ain`t tripping.
i`m just missing uu. i miss uu even more. _________________________________________________ baby ur all that i want.
when ur lying here in my arms.
i`m finding it hard to believe
we`re in heaven.
and love is all that i need.
and i found it there in ur heart.
it isn`t too hard to see.
we`re in heaven.
now nothing can change what uu mean to me.
there`s a lot that i can say.

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, September 08, 2006


this is what ii did while waiting for my darling syasya =)

the beauty exposed ;

the beauty exposed ;



scene: beach.

the beauty exposed ;



changi beach. =))

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, September 04, 2006


happy birthday sweets

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, September 03, 2006


she realised that she has been dreaming a lot lately.
okay whatever.
she found out something.
remember what she said: words are wanton? yes, they are wanton.
this is to him: why say all those when uu don`t mean it?
u`ve got her and yet uu said 'nevertheless, i still wait to gain ur trust, to have uu back in my arms' doesn`t sound that sound super familiar?
yes. she knows everything. =)) well, best wishes.
and now do uu know the reason why she always say: say it when uu mean it? yes, that`s the reason. and uu made her not to even guys more.
fcuk all those words.
damn it.

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, September 02, 2006


hello

the beauty exposed ;



smileeee

the beauty exposed ;



ciakk

the beauty exposed ;



yeahh?

the beauty exposed ;



candid.

the beauty exposed ;



wwwweeeeeeeeee

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, September 01, 2006


this blog has been so not updated.
maybe it`s because we have our own respective blog,
and we neglect this blog.
ohh well.
so yeahh.
prelims have been so bad for me.
english paper 1 english paper 2 malay paper 1
malay paper 2 math paper 1
math paper 2
literature paper 1
literature paper 2
chemistry
physics
geography
social studies
d&t

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, August 29, 2006


Ouh well. Been quite some tym since i blog here. Hmm. Maybe ive got my personalised blog. Tt`s it. But well. Not to worry. Cause i wun forget this blog. So. Anw. My life has been in great hopstle topsle. I seem to miss my fren. Yeah. I miss my abg wawal. Hell. I appologised to sayang dearest fer having this feeling okae. So. That dae wen i saw him in skewl made me fret about all this. But how come. Syasya and him suddenly become like this. I wonder. Is it a mistake i made. No. There isnt any mistakes or whatsoever. The only thing i knew was that he was kindda pissed off wen he figured out that i and my sayang dearest is getting closer. But see. Wen syasya and sayang dearest is getting closer, syasya n him is drifting apart. Y like that. . . . Yes. He is my shadow. My abg. I love him. Yes. I love him. And let me make this clear. Love as the love i have fer fadd and stuffs okae. The love i have fer sayang dearest is completely diff. Ok. Freak laa. But can i sae tt i miss him. Aside missing sayang dearest. I am missing my abg wawal. ))= Do eu tink im bad missing two guys at the same tym? Its up to eu to decide. Ive never been separated frm abg wawal fer like this. Besides the 2 weeks thgy and the post break-up thgy. But that was last year. Solid 2 mths since we saw each other again and patch. And broke off again. And remain as frens as i started off to see him as my bro and sth in my heart. And started to like this sweetie pie by the name of sayang dearest. Till den. We have never separate or lost contact. But it`s all happening now. And i just cannot move on with him by my side. Yes. I depended on him. But i move on. Den comes wen he depended on me. I helped him to move on. Now. im back to be dependent on him yet and again. And now. I am not able to do that once more. And i moved on with my life wen we totally like lost contact. So maybe. I have to do that. And i am doing it right now. But it hurts. Parting with someone eu really tresure and love and comfortable and everything laa. He is like my family. He noes everythg about me. And he is so3 close to me. And fugging ass. I miss NURUL. Yes. Akil birthdae is comin. Abg and adik birthdae is coming too. Nurul`s bdae is coming too. I wonder how NUrul is now. Does she even remember me? Does she still ask about me. Hmm. Pak busu is cruel. If he`s afraid of calling just because of my sister den. Knowing him. I noe that he will find me by othe source means. But i doubt so. So bottom line is that he has got someone new in his life. But that isnt fair at all. How do i managed to have a guy and at the same time establishing frenship with eu? Eu once promised me that no matter what which gerl comes into ur life, eu will sae this. "No matter what, deep down in my heart, a part of my heart belongs to NURSYAHIDAH BINTE MOHD SHOKRI." Eu liar. Eu lied. I am no longer important in ur life. Ur words are wanton MUhammad Shawal. Im trying to hate eu as time passes by. But i failed. Cause it`s been like 3 daes or so. I cried remembering eu. Its not fair. Eu may be happy while here i am shedding tears fer eu. What do i gain. See. I am reprimanding myself. And it only last fer few minutes. After that i will tink about eu again. Yes. The oni thg to forgt eu is to love sb as much as i can. But i cant. I am afraid to love sayang dearest as much. Yes love but now as much as sb could love his/her bf/gf/ I am not like the last tym sya. And tis happened because of eu Muhammad Shawal. Yes. I lose trust in love because of eu. Fer that. I am afraid to love again though i am trying and im happy to declare that i love my sayang dearest. But see. If my life doesnt turn out to be like this, i doubt i am what i am now. So i hope that i will be the last tym sya wen i am able and am free to love that sb as much as i can. Fuck. I have to admit that i feel so weak without eu by my side. The feeling is much worsen than of the last tyM. Being in this condition fer the 2nd ty, is much3 worse than it was before. But i hope eu are doing well. Send regards to ur family. I miss ur along. I miss ur mom. I miss abg sani. I miss nurul. I miss playing with her. Gawd. That cheeky girl. And fren. History hurts kan. And awak. Its september. Remember what happened to me? Thx to eu too. But it happened to me again. Ur words are bullshit dumbass. I noe. Ure happi with some gerl and has settle down. But it`s not fair. Remember what i go thru with sayang dearest because of eu. Now. Ure being selfish.

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, August 25, 2006


arg. FINALLY i can get into a blog. but however, i can`t change the font. and sadly, i can`t even get into my OWN blog. freak larh. but nvm. so anyway, darling grrlfwen, HAPPY 6`S. love you bebeh. faddie`s in tech room right now. i`ve been switching computers just to BLOG. ohh! plainsunset`s performance is today!! go catch it okay. aha. poor thing i can`t go. firstly, i`m dead broke. now, i`m hungry and sleepy. he didn`t attend school today for whatever reason. i thought shaz and i was late but we weren`t. ehh. but actually, we were late but teacher let us off. FUHHH. and yes, shaz and i ran to school! aha! we did. okay stop it. shaz, have i told you that i dreamt of asyraf[acap] and razif kassim. aha. i don`t know why and it`s weird. but they were there in my dreams, playing XBOX. lol. i got up from bed angrily simply because i didn`t have a good night sleep. doinks. all thanks to my dear brother, he spoke on the phone with Godknowswho until 2 am? he was making so much noise and he was in MY room. i`m a sleepyhead or i`d rather be called, sleeping beauty. lame. syasya`s home already i think. i hope she`s excited. hoho. ohh. before i forget, HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY SYAZ & ANGEL. and HAPPY BELATED 16TH BIRTHDAY RAFIKA. school will close at 3.30 as the teachers have their teachers` day dinner at HYATT. awesome. okay i guess i shall get back to my work before i get caught. okay bye.

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, August 24, 2006


Fuhh. Ive been sprouting out profanities these days. Sths wrong with me. PMS? Not quite. CO0ming maybe. HAHA. Its 25th of the MONTH tml. And syasya`s sixth. Half a YEAR. That`s quite LONGgg. Im not quite myself lately. -___-" Tell me what has got into me. Maybe that? Fad`s rite though. I tink it`s that. But why still cant i? Shithead. I miss my sayang dearest. LOTS. "Happy sixth sayang." Im pissed. Fuck. Chiao. And we went home early todae after nite study. Sth i find it`s not fair. Fuck. Again. Sorri. Shup. ((= Tt made me smile. ``SYAsya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, August 23, 2006


I had fun in the bus. Wen otw to nite study. Fun. Fun. Sths wrong with me. See. Can i have more of that? ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, August 12, 2006


Woo. Tis blog has beeen daead. Grr. So. Anw. I miss my sayang dearest larh. Miss him like hell. Grr. Fad! Fad! Help me yeah. *smack head* So anw. Slpng occupies my tym. And well. Im sad over my resulf . Uh shit! Ok im done. Tata.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, August 10, 2006


faddie`s in school. weeee. well. shaz is beside me now. we`re suppose to do dnt but then but then. . haha. uu know us. we won`t do our work unless teacher is here. so anyway, i don`t know what`s becoming of me. everytime i eat, i feel like vomitting. arg. shaz just said: "aiyohh. fad. uu pregnant eh?" damn uu shaz. i`m not okay. i`m still a VIRGIN. wakkaka. okay. lame. let this be a short entry. go to http://ragdollnomore-.blogspot.com for more happening. and ohh! I LOVE 08AUGUST!! weeeee~ shaz missed out the fun. poor her. but at least she got to see the fireworks. right right? this friday and saturday.. fireworks.. wanna go? hmmm i think i end it here. update some other time. tata.

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, August 07, 2006


Alas. Im in here. Yes! Yes! Been soo3 long. Yeah i noe. I miss switheart. 4sure. Cant log in. Tts the problem. And it realli3 pissED me off. Yeah. S anw. I just came home. Yeah. Too many topic to blog on todae. So 1stly. Im gonna start on. Y i dun like toking to dearest darling otp now. I mean. Its been so3 super long rite. Yeah. I miss al tt. But sumtyms i have to learn hw to let go on sumthgs. Cn? Once blog about tt on my blog. So. I admit its kindda irritating. Wen all eu wanted to tok to was ur super3 darling. But ur darling may be busy with their new frens. U dun even noe hu she mixes with and so on. So pple chg. So i just hope that if i cld change the time. I want us. Me and my super3 darling. Tt no one cld ever replace. To be like the last tym us. I hope tt we wun grow up. So bottom line is that we wun meet new frens. LOL. Tts selfish. But true wat. New frens cum. Wat about the old. Its better i keep to myself now. Yeah. So daa. Wun elaborate much. More details bout my outing with Ali will be in my blog. Study laa to be exact. Was fun. Fun. Kan bolala. Sori ehk tercampak. Wakakaka. Bluek!! Miss my darling very3 much. Not forgetting. Syasya miss my sayang dearest laa. Its soo sad tt he didnt leave me any msg. At all. Watever. Still my miss towards him is on fire. Super lots. Tkcr to pple sya love.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, August 05, 2006


she never thought of feeling this way,
but it`s inevitable to her.
nevertheless, she doesn`t want history to repeat.
she`s confused.
she doesn`t even know if it`s sincerity.
or is it just an act.
she doesn`t wanna know if his playing her.
she`s had enough of what has happened.
if ever she finds out that it`s all lies,
there goes her trust to others.
and the one to be blamed for,
is you.

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, August 04, 2006


school was fun today!! i love school, well, only today. firstly. photo taking was awesome. our class theme was grease lightning. cool aye? we were kinda vain. haha. we got preapared more than an hour before. so after school, there was chemistry remedial. i sat with regu. it was fun lorr. i didn`t pay attention. well, as always. he bullied me lorr. so i scribbled on his hands. weeee~ after chemistry rememdial, there`s math mock exam but syasya and i came at 3.30 when it actualy started at 2.30. and we handed in the paper at 4.30 which means we did the paper for an hour only. syasya and i then went to had our superb late lunch at mr prata. the service there is becoming worse. i mean it`s like we ordered potato and meat together with the noodle, then he said nvm go eat. shithead. so anyway, d&t was next til 9.45. okay i admit. i did my work for 10% and then 90% played catching with aidil. he started it all first okay. but it was fun thou. we practically ran around the whole school. tired, we went up to the hall. there, we met quek. haha. then mrs neo came out from the hall and asked what were we doing there. so we answered, we had d&t. so with enough courage, i ask "teacher, can we go in and have some food?" haha. thick skinned right? lol. she nodded and said "yes yes why not. there`s still a lot more=))" so we went in. lol. so we went to eat at the basketball court there. we had fun right? so i went home with him and shaz. but shaz was isolated. so we crapped. a lot. was fun fun. so the next time, he sends me home. lol. as if. lalaaa. so overall, i had a fun day today. =))

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, July 30, 2006


Boo. I woke up early todae. So many task to be done todae. But being the lazy me. I noe it wouldnt. LOL. So anw fad. How was ur dae. Fri, Sat? gg well? Hope so okae. Ive been busy outside n didnt get the chance to kol eu. I shall kol eu later since maybe i wun be gg anywhere. Or late evening i shall mit my fren. Wee. Cross my finger and hope jadik. ((= So anw. Got nth to blog alrd. Bubbye-
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, July 29, 2006


fad`s home from school. i had d&t just now til 1++. it ended pretty early today. i thought i could complete it but i forgot to do one part. doinks. so i asked for aidil`s help to spray paint my base for me. hmmm. thanks yahh. [[sya. what action? i rushed down to downtown to meet uu but when i msg, uu didn`t reply, when i called, uu said uu just receive the call which is like at 10.15 when i actually called uu at 9.15?]] i sat a mc til nearing 10 then decided to go off since u didn`t return any of my msg or call. nonetheless, i bumped into ahmad, asyraf and razif. we smiled and fullstop. i was pretty tired yesterday and i slept early. ohh yeah. to my surprise, iskandar called me yesterday. he asked me if i`m free today to go to the concert. i`m sorry i`m not free. ohh! i saw him during my d&t. but nvm. skip that part. nothing happened. well, after long, i saw him. shall not say anymore. yesterday thingy went fine but i felt scared of cos. shaz accompanied me cos syasya was busy. the officer at the guard house was SUPER CUTE!! seriously. he asked what happened and all but i was 'mesmerized' by his looks. haha. joking. his charming! okay stop it. so anyway, that 'talk' lasted for an hour or so. now i know what to do every saturday. watch soccer! wakakkaa. serious. most probably, after d&t, i`ll watch them play. i`m looking forward for the upcoming match. wish uu luck aight. ali, play like a pro[like me. ahem] must win okay? and pls pls pls. don`t find fault. the other team is like those who loves to find fault. so refrain from fighting okay. =)) well, i wanna take a nap. i`m tired.

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Fad! U eksyen. Gt hp never msg me. Nvr kol me. Hmph. So how`s everythg? Settled? Anw. YEsterdae i tot can mit fer a while. But. Nah its okay. Im going to ITE Simei soon. Wanna come? Dere`s perfomance going on. Laa. Im gg with abg wawal. N sayang dearest is totally cool with it. Im gg to behave okay. I swear i will. Coz.. I love him lor. Yes! Yes! I do. ((=
Wei. Tis blog is totally dead. Im sori cause i dun have tge tym to blog already. Sigh. Seriously. Im very busy. But im not busy studying. See. Im still having fun. Prelims are weeks away. And im scared. Ive not yet revise on anything. Gosh. Argh! That sucks.
Ouh freak. Im down with the flu. Headaches. N cold. Gawd help me. Im afraid if sayang dearest got my flu. LOL. I hope not. So anythg. He`s such a darling. I lovelove him. Yes i love him. So he sang yesterdae. Wanted to record it but he did bot let me to. So i heard him sang. Nice voice. Haa. Well. Tell me. Even if that someone voice sounded horrible. But that`s ur special someone. His voice will definitely sound melodious enuf. True? But his was nice okay. C arr hus matair. LOL. Jk.
I guess i`ll stop hanging ard with amy and co. But i miss dem laa. I will. We shall c how laa okay. Fer now. I wan to play the com fer a while. Its gg to be late alrd. I have to mit abg wawal at 2;30. I hope i wun be late oky. Wee. I miss my sayang dearest. I miss my sayang dearest. Smwah! BIG hugs. Syg. Im sick. I guess. ))=
``Syasya-

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Thursday, July 27, 2006


a l o h a ` ! the blog seems dead. so anyway, i`ll be posting up at short entry cos i`m not suppose to use the computer now. since they are all praying, i take advantage lorr. hey! it`s 27!! weeee~ school was super tiring. ater school, we had physics practical and then i went for my d&t. i hope i can finish it by saturday? but impossible larh. i have yet to spray paint and all. grr. wish me luck, guys. i`ve just had my dinner. yummy. my computer`s lagging. grr. i heard that the sec 4na has night study from 4pm to 9pm from monday to friday. fooohh. best of luck people. haha. there`s night study tmr. ohh shoot. i don`t want tmr to come. it`s gonna be a disaster. damn it. i can`t escape from it. somehow, i have to face it. reality check. ps: i miss uu.

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Monday, July 24, 2006


Wee. Having malay lessons now. Fun indeed. Since we finished out stufs. We are able to play the com. And i saw my sayang dearest. Wee. N i sooo miss him. Shall sum everything up. Anw. Yesterdae syasya went to cityhall agayn. Wee. Now that place is my playground i guess. So. Anw. There`s tis guy hu i find kinda irritating. Grr. But well. Swear. He`s my fwen. Anw. Yesterdae happenings was like tis. After cityhall, i met fad. Was suprised wen she agreed. Cause we dun reali hang ard animore. Supposedly, we are to study but ended up. We played pool. Wee. Its a draw. Fair game. Wee. Was fun laaa. Since it`s been long since i went out with my dear faddie. Anw. During the pool. It was not that packed. But in the middle of the game, faddie was being called. And i tot sb nak fight with her. But guess wat?! That girl hu called her is/was fad`s fwen. Her fwen wanted my number. LOL. Crazy!! Haa. But like duh. I didnt give it out easily okay. But let me comment. The fair guy is cute. Honestly. He`s cute. Fad noes kan. AAfter pool, went to eat sundae. Yummeh. Wee. Shall eat some more okae. We hang ard at the bstop fer a while. Skali saw faddie`s mom n fwens. I was scared lor cause i have to take the same bus as them. Hahaha. Grr.
After that, went to tamp to take 69. And there`s this golden-haired guy came to me. WTH! I hate laa al tis. Cant be bothered. I guess that todae itself, there`s like 4 guys came to me to ask fer my number. Lalala. No wae. I love my sayang dearest still. Like he said. He `s hurt if someone he loves betrayed him. I mean. I dun wan to betray him. N i dun wan him to lose his trust in me. Cause swear. I do love him. ((=
And at nite, i hog on the phone with sayang dearest. Wee. Fun. Fun. Super fun. If oni there isnt ani skewl todae. Laa.But i noe he misses me a lottttttttttttttt. As he said. But wat can we do. Besides complaining. Lalala.
Ok. Im done. Sayang dearest just messaged me saying he miss me. Wee. Study hard n concentrate k sayang. Chiayou. Love eu baby. Miss eu. Miss eu. Miss eu. Miss eu. Muaahzz.
And sayang. Its 25 tml. Here`s an advanced 5 MONTHLY ANNIVERSARY. Haa. LOL. I love him. I swear that i love him. Even more?
Okay gtg. Lala
``Syasya-

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Wee. Having malay lessons now. Fun indeed. Since we finished out stufs. We are able to play the com. And i saw my sayang dearest. Wee. N i sooo miss him. Shall sum everything up. Anw. Yesterdae syasya went to cityhall agayn. Wee. Now that place is my playground i guess. So. Anw. There`s tis guy hu i find kinda irritating. Grr. But well. Swear. He`s my fwen. Anw. Yesterdae happenings was like tis. After cityhall, i met fad. Was suprised wen she agreed. Cause we dun reali hang ard animore. Supposedly, we are to study but ended up. We played pool. Wee. Its a draw. Fair game. Wee. Was fun laaa. Since it`s been long since i went out with my dear faddie. Anw. During the pool. It was not that packed. But in the middle of the game, faddie was being called. And i tot sb nak fight with her. But guess wat?! That girl hu called her is/was fad`s fwen. Her fwen wanted my number. LOL. Crazy!! Haa. But like duh. I didnt give it out easily okay. But let me comment. The fair guy is cute. Honestly. He`s cute. Fad noes kan. AAfter pool, went to eat sundae. Yummeh. Wee. Shall eat some more okae. We hang ard at the bstop fer a while. Skali saw faddie`s mom n fwens. I was scared lor cause i have to take the same bus as them. Hahaha. Grr.
After that, went to tamp to take 69. And there`s this golden-haired guy came to me. WTH! I hate laa al tis. Cant be bothered. I guess that todae itself, there`s like 4 guys came to me to ask fer my number. Lalala. No wae. I love my sayang dearest still. Like he said. He `s hurt if someone he loves betrayed him. I mean. I dun wan to betray him. N i dun wan him to lose his trust in me. Cause swear. I do love him. ((=
And at nite, i hog on the phone with sayang dearest. Wee. Fun. Fun. Super fun. If oni there isnt ani skewl todae. Laa.But i noe he misses me a lottttttttttttttt. As he said. But wat can we do. Besides complaining. Lalala.
Ok. Im done. Sayang dearest just messaged me saying he miss me. Wee. Study hard n concentrate k sayang. Chiayou. Love eu baby. Miss eu. Miss eu. Miss eu. Miss eu. Muaahzz.
And sayang. Its 25 tml. Here`s an advanced 5 MONTHLY ANNIVERSARY. Haa. LOL. I love him. I swear that i love him. Even more?
Okay gtg. Lala
``Syasya-

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Sunday, July 23, 2006


syasya&khairul

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aren`t they sweet? =))

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the sweethearts coincidence.

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-us-

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ib&sya

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syasya&faiz

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yuetting&faddie

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islin&faddie

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dyla&syasya

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faddie&ana-

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shamir&syasya-

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perhaps. perhaps. perhaps.

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aidil&syasya-

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-faddie*syasya-

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-syasya.solo-

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candid

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-syasya-

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sher&syaa.

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syasya&poovan. =))

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poovan&faddie. weee~

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najib&syasya. hugs.

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faddie&jiawei. kiss me.

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syasya&jiawei.loves.

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no doubt, we <3>

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najib&faddie*[[don`t we look good? *winks*]]

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faddie*aidil* [[ps.ain`t he cute?]]

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syasya*

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i had a long day yesterday. firstly, i rushed to school for d&t. i left school at almost 2.30pm. Shaz wanted to borrow library books so i accompanied her and something happened while i was alone. [[only syasya knows *winks* secret okay syaa?]] i was aimlessly walking around. i didn`t want to go home cos it was so early. i have to go out on saturdays even if i`m going out to school. hello, it`s saturday. so decided to go to mango field cos there was a match. eventually, it ended up several people getting hurt. my borther sprained his ankle but look on the bright side, u won! wakaka. i didn`t know ali was there. so he has expanded his circle of friends. weee~ =)) i was bueing bullied in the bus. grr. so anyway, i`m currently uploading the pictures which is like so damn bloody slow lorr. my friend has a problem yesterday. tried to talk to him and cheer him up but to no avail. hey, look on the bright side of life okay? *smile* yesterday was also another cam-whoring day for me =) i was taking picture of us and i forgot to take picture of the match. doinks. so anyway, picture`s will be posted soon. =)) ohh. my darling syasya called me. weee. after so long, we finally hog on the phone. miss euu too.

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Monday, July 17, 2006


Fad!! Good luck fer ur LC. Chiayou!! ((= See ya in skewl..
``Syasya-

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17o7o7. i thought i was gonna be late for school but not. i missed one freaking traffic light and then i had to wait for the 7 o'clock bus -_-" so anyway, the day started fine. early in the morning, chocolates entered my mouth. yummy yummy. choc makes my day. i think something`s wrong with syasya. ohh well. anyway, i thought we were suppose to chill out somewhere? i said to teacher i had to go home asap cos thought we were going to hang out as planned. but then but then. whatever larhh. so yeahh. i managed to escape d&t. well, despite whatever teacher had reprimaded me, i`m still being stubborn. my day`s gonna be ruin. i don`t know why. i have a confession to make. syasya and i are not as close as last time. seriously. may be it`s bacause of friends? i don`t know. we`re only seen as best friends during school time. otherwise, not. we barely contact. =(( even in class, we don`t really communicate.ohh well. i can`t do anything. but as long as she`s happy and fine with it, then good for her larh. she has loads of other people too.

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Sunday, July 16, 2006


17o7o7. i woke up at almost nine and quickly showered to go to school. i don`t know why but i was kinda excited to go to school. haha. but whatever. ibu sent me and shaz. ad, poor thing. she had to sit beside the security guard cos she was wearing slippers and not allowed to enter the school compound. so shaz came to the rescue. she brought her shoes. dnt was not bad afterall thou i must admit it was kinda boring. at least i got to drill and tap. one accomplishment, don`t uu think? okay. when i was eager to go home, i dropped my screw. so i bend down and reached for it. being careless, i hurt myself. my knee hit hard on the compressor and now uu can see a hole there. seriously. i mean not at the compressor larh! and my knee. it`s still bleeding but not as much. and mr tan was like "are uu okay? need to go hospital or not?" and laughs. duhh. it`s not as if i`m gonna die or something but thank uu for being caring =). shaz and i didn`t went home straight. we went to tampines mall and century square. i went to popular and took all the stuff that i wanted and it cost almost 17 dollars. i was like wtf. so i put back the unneccessary stuff and tokk ath 6 dollars stuff. i saw miza! haha. now i so want that PONY bag. it turns me on! and that shirt! wooooooo! but money so no talk. i reached home close to 5. stoopid bus number 3 broke down. shaz was lucky that that was her stop. and stoopid door didn`t open. so i had to walk a longer route. i had enough of walking for the past 2 consecutive days! i was damn hungry. that made me double mad. as soon as i reached home, i ate whatever my mum left me. there was only me and my dad at home. i was watching tv and then my mum came up and asked me to shower. i tagged along with my mum and dad, and her friends. we went to eat ayam penyet at changi. eat again. yummy. then i headed to esplanade. there was dre, azhar, hariz, fir, syazana and elnah. i saw ib and faris botak. i saw nana! weee. i saw several people larh. i left esplanade at 11? around there i think. so we separated from fir, syaz and elnah. we went to tamp. there was something going on. so eventually, i reached home at 12.20. i had to go to bed quickly so that my dad didn`t know i went out. fuhh. ohh, i miss syasya.

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Saturday, July 15, 2006


what`s up? i know we haven`t spoken for a while. but i was thinking about uu. and it kinda made me smile. so many things to say. and i`ll put them in a letter. thought it might be easier. the words might come out better. so many things i wanna know the answers to. wish i could press rewind and rewrite every line to the story of uu and me. don`t uu know i`ve tried and i`ve tried. to get uu out my mind. but it don`t get no better. as each day goes by. and i`m lost and confused. i`ve got nothing to lose. hope to hear from you soon. P.S. i`m still not over uu. assembly was awesome. dance, choir and dre`s performance. nice nice. =) u look good thou *winks* i`m feeling exhausted and lethargic. i`m going off to bed now. such a freaking short entry. ohh. i so wanna go to baybeats tmr!! but too bad. i can`t. DAMN. kaylarh i guess i update when i`m free again. good night good night. ps: ii miss euu.

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Wednesday, July 12, 2006


Boo. Wee. Todae. Went out. Was fun. But ending was horrible. And i meant it. Disaster. So. I filled my tummy to the brim. But it was still not full though. But oklaa.. Went to eat Seoul Garden. He paid fer it anw. Yeah. He insisted. So well i agreed. We took neoprints. LOL. After soo long. Was nice though. But we are dumb as ever cause we totally screwed up the money as we do not know how to operate that machine with too many button on it. LOL. Ou yeah. Thx okay.. ((= After that head to pool. Wee. After so long since i hold that cue. Wakaka. Anw. At the end of it. I so soo agitated that i scold profinities. One of them is. Kikilala Mak. Im sori. But i doesnt mean to scold eu. Sori. Guilt overcome me. Tsk. Im sorri. Shall update the neoprints some dae due to technical problems. And maybe. Im gonna mit my lovely bro tml. Wee. Yeah. He`s coming to skewl. Wee. Just hope that sayang dearest wun mind. ((= And so i miss him. My ayang dearest. Muackz!
``Syasya-

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Tuesday, July 11, 2006


Wee. Im meet him todae. ((= Hapi. I miss him super lots.

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Monday, July 10, 2006


Another dae of fucked-UP life. Im tired. Im filled with hatred. Sorrowness filled my heart. Cant take all tis animore. I miss eu. Yes eu. And EU. I got eu back. And thx to All Mighty fer that. U raised my hopes. Yet eu r the one hu shattered it time and again. Cum to tink again. Syasya da alwaez face w all tis stuffs. Yeah i do have tis feeling that im just someone hu can be dere if he needs. BUt not exactly being de role of hu i am suppose to be in reality. Im sick and tired of having the feelings of being played. OK im done. -_____-" And to eu. I guess. U will be fine too w/o me. I`ll walk on my own. I`ll learn. I guess u dun relise how much i miss eu too. Im filled with too much of ego. Go. Go. She will be dere, yeah. Im not there for far too long. Yeah. Im drifting myself apart from all tis. I pray fervently that i will be alright. Save this thg between me and eu. I dun want it to slipped away from me. And that goes the same to eu. But well. U`re happi now.
Im glad. ((=
I miss eu. I miss eu. And i miss myself.
``Syasya-

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Sunday, July 09, 2006


a l o h a ` ! yesterday, faddie went to the airport. alone =) it was more of a 'letting everything go' time rather than study. i swear i looked at the planes. i just wish i could fly. wakakaa. lame. so yeahh. my mum`s friends came over for karaoke. seriously. they have been friends for 3 decades! awesome. we shall last as long as them okay syasya? =)) i tried to stay awake to watch portugal and germany`s match but i pity my eyes. so anyway, germany won! woohooo. i guess italy`s gonna be the champion. i think so. france win my lunk throughout the game, ehk? so anyway, i went for religious class just now and boy, last 2 period was fun! i like! we practically laughed our ass out. one sad thing, she couldn`t teach us anymore. i didn`t know she works as a counsellor. so now i guess i know who to turn to! ohh yeahh. syasya pratically fell of from her seat in the bus! literally. wakakakkaka. damn funny lorr. should have video it. but then again, it`s wrong. so no no. syasya, something`s bothering uu right? i know. and since when did you become secretive huh? don`t be like me okay. i know it hurts to be 'suffering' alone. been there, done that. so what`s up girl? ohh. food`s here. taa.

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Wednesday, July 05, 2006


Story of my life searching for the right but it keeps avoiding me sorrow in my soul
cause it seems that wrong really loves my company
Hes more than a man
and this is more than love the reason that the sky is blue the clouds are rolling in because i'm gone again and to him i just can't be true
and i know that he knows i'm unfaithful and it kills him inside to know that i am happy with some other guy i can see him dying
I don't wanna do this anymore i don't wanna be the reason why everytime i walk out the door i see him die a little more inside i don't wanna hurt him anymore i don't wanna take away his life i don't wanna be... a murderer
i feel it in the air as i'm doing my hair preparing for another day a kiss up on my cheek he's here reluctantly as if i'm gonna be out late i say i won't be long just hanging with the girls a lie i didn't have to tel lbecause we both know where i'm about to go and we know it very well
cause i know that he knows i'm unfaithful and it kills him inside to know that i am happy with some other guy i can see him dying
i don't wanna do this anymore i don't wanna be the reason why everytime i walk out the door i see him die a little more inside i don't wanna hurt him anymore i don't wanna take away his life i don't wanna be...
a murderer
our love, his trust
i might as well take a gun and put it to his head get it over with i don't wanna do this anymore (anymore)
i don't wanna do this anymore i don't wanna be the reason why everytime i walk out the doori see him die a little more inside i don't wanna hurt him anymore i don't wanna take away his life i don't wanna be...
a murderer (a murderer)
no no no no yeah yeah yeah
``Syasya-

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The blog is dead. Period. -___-" A lot of thgs have been happening lately. And one of those is about some anoynomous person. And i swear that i am not on track to those gossips that i heard recently. Its so alien to me. And i swear that it is all about mistaken identity who bad-mouthed me? I dont know what is happening but im feeling that she has sth against me. My instict tells me so. And its because of the fact that she reacted so coldly against me. The stares i received lately. Y is she reacting in such way that really makes uncomfortable. I do have emotional feelings too. Tt`s why i can sense that something is really amiss. Hu ever the MOFO is, i hope one dae it will be revealed. Its okay if this tym im the one who has to face ths shits that i never did. What goes around will difinitely comes around. And i want that MOFO to get his/her shits back like how i face it. Yeah. But maybe. Am i just perasan? Feeling she`s toking to me but actually it was sb else? Maybe.
Its depressing wenn u are living in world of fake-NESS.
I hope tis wun affect me in any way. ((=
And other matter is about me feeling ever sooo guily. Im sorri to him. No its just words from them. And thx eu fer everythg. Shall not elaborate. And im soo sori fer the sorrows i gave eu. However. I love eu sayang. Sori i hurt eu. And i am ever so glad to have eu and somedae i noe that eu will be back in my arms. ANd i missing eu ever so much. I love eu. Yes i do. And thx sayang fer loving me. Yeah i can sense tat u`d wanted to go, slipping away from me. I tot u wld. And i realli tot that wae. But it never happened tt wae. Im so glad it`s not like that. I hurt eu but u willingly wanted me back time and again. U have left a great impact in me. And sayang. I want eu to know that i love eu baby. I love eu soo much. Pls. I hope that tis tym it will turn back to normal. And the love eu have fer me will never decreased. All my life, i prayed fer sb like eu. I feel loved. Yeah. Thx syg fer tt.
``Syasya-

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Tuesday, July 04, 2006


the blog seems dead without syasya`s entries =) well, what can i say? many things have been happening lately. and i mean it. a lot of things. so i guess after everything goes back to normal, the blog will also go back to normal. doinks` -_-"

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Monday, July 03, 2006


Tt`s abg and adek. <3> He was trying to smile- Too LATE.((= He was HUNGRY laaa. Cian dier.. LOL BlurreD- Ok smile. It`s SYASYA N WAWAL I LOIKE this best. Shiok sendiri in toilet. He was HURT. Sorri.
``Syasya-

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Yesterdae was too tired to posst an entry. So. Finally. Went to City Hall with my dearest abg wawal. Yeah. He asked me out for that. And first tot, i tot i want to give it a miss though my heart was heavy. But finally, i did go. Wee ((= So i wore tis white top with a jeans and tis handbag. He fetched me fom my home. Swit. Gentleman. Told him just to meet me at small mac but he insisted. So thx. And. Upon seeing him, he was shocked. I dunnoe how to explain. In awe. That`s what he said. Nonsen oni. So. To sum up. Was glad tt i can go out with him. ((=
We wanted to visit the MERLION. But he was 'bathing.' So no merlion. Next tym shall go again. Thx fer knocking some sense in me yesterdae. Thx. Will eu be dere? Seriously. I dun wan to be dependent on eu like i am the last tym. Im learning nt to be one. Thx fer ur concern. I shall reconsider about that. But i do miss those times. Airports. Library. McDonalds. It`s been long since they last see us. Haa. LOL.
He has a gold of heart. I shall agree with that statement. So. Saw Yuet Ting at the BK while at there itself. Finally. My doubts have been resolved. I dunno hu to believe still. So. I shall be immune to everythg. I dun wan to belive his explanation. So. We saw Gladyn!!!!!!! She is like sooo pretty. And bo. I do miss her a lot laaa.. We close sei last tym. But now. Not anymore. So she`s working at Robinson. Chatted with her fer a while. Nice chat and nice laugh. ((= Ok daa. Pictures up soon.. ((=
``Syasya-

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Saturday, July 01, 2006


o1o7o6- cross country. HAHA. unexpected. congrats to SYASYA and SHAZ. *big hug* after cross country, i went home to change and take money. a minute later, i was out. met syasya, shaz and ad for a meal. damn. i haven`t eat since yst night. but i got 11 hours of sleep yesterday!! weeeeeee~ from 8pm to 7.10am. haha`! awesome. and i didn`t even eat until just now morning. and i filled my stomach with coke first. now i`m down with gastric. weeeee~ now it hurts. a lot. so anyway, syasya and shaz came over to have movie marathon. but in the end, i ended up in talking marathon, syasya ended up in sleeping marathon and shaz ended up in computer marathon. HAHAA~ scary movie 4 was a boredom. right? or is it me who didn`t concentrate. hmmm. i think so. i`m so lethargic. arghh. didn`t even get my eyes to close after cross country. damn it. i think i go get some sleep. i need a hug =(

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Friday, June 30, 2006


So i manage to persuade my ayah to let me use the com. Thx dad. ((= Hmm. I have to blog secretly cause i told them that i want to do my skewl project. Yeah. My modemn has been confiscated. Those siblings of mine do not let me use the internet animore since i dun give dem 12 bucks. Pathetic me. But well hu cares. So im wondering what`s up with sayang dearest? He seems to be in a bad mood. He`s been putting up with a long face. And gee. I miss him. Yes. I do. I do. And tml is the cross coutry. I hope my sayang dearest will get a placing. I wish. I wish. And yeah i will be going to pasir sirs park with him tml. Wee. So early in the morning im able to see him. Wee. Ok da. Till den. Dada miss de
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, June 29, 2006


Im bruised and battered by his words. Tears and shattered nw it hurts. Lalala. Well. Im exaggerating. LOL. But well. That was the first tym i guess he practically raised his voice and i felt a lil upset. YeAH. Im being so pathetic. I noe. -____-" But. Well. So well. He had never raised his voice. But that was in a joking manner. I noe. Or it was some kind of being LOUD. Cause that`s him. I noe. But just now. He was forcing me to tell him sth that i said to forget him. So that makes him mad? Sori. But eu. No nid to raised ur voice can? Okay. This is the DE FIRST TYM ever after 4 months 4 daez. Well. Obviously. There`s more to come. Maybe. So. Eww.. Dada HATE people raising their voice at me. Uh fcuk! Sori. Profinities not said to eu. But well. What goes ard, comes ard. I noe. I noe. I did raised my voice at abg wawal the last tym. So here. Finally. Ive got it back. I guess i noe how it feels. Sb raising ur voice. And that sb is the one eu love? WTF. Okay im done. Gtg.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, June 28, 2006


hello bloggie. it`s been super long since i last blog here. wooopss. i admit that school was fun today but minus the part where i was late. i went to school with shaz and dre. i was the earliest! i waited for shaz for like 15 minutes! but nvm =)). we walked to downtown east bus stop and by the time dre reached was like hmmm 7++ already. but again, nvm. =)) so the three of us were late. but it`s okay. dre=action! hmphhff!! syasya dearest and i did 'art', our finest creaction for one and a half hour. we practically drew on each other`s hand. wakakaa. syasya drew one BIG flower, and i mean it, BIG, on my left hand and i really looked like aci. wakakkaa. the colour of the flower contrast the tone of my skin. so then it was my turn for revenge. i drew a big heart shape and wrote "i love singapore" wakakaa. we coloured our fingernails and all. gosh. chemistry lesson was fun! we blew the elastic balloon. u know the small little tiny packet that comes with the tiny straw. yeahh. syasya went to me and said "fad, take off ur specs" and then PHHHAAAMMM! she bloody smacked the balloon right on my face. english lesson was awesome! we had this kinda debate thingy. cool. i went for d&t at 3.45pm and i left at 4.20pm. wakakaa. and teacher caught me. this is what he said or should i say, have been saying : "where are u going? what have u done? u ahhh.. i don`t think u can complete ur artefact. u still have the mechanism to work on. . . . .. " and then walks away. no doubt that he don`t care about me anymore. hahaks. i`m wondering why am i having this headache practically EVERYDAY. honestly. it keeps on spinning and i feel so bad. i feel like eating half a dozen of panadol. wakkakaa. it`s been on for 3 consecutive days lorr. argh.

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, June 27, 2006


So. I just came back from airport. Yeah. It`s late. But i was having fun at the same tym doing my hws. But didnt manage to complete it. But im proud to say tt im done with my compre. ((= So anw. Thx fad. Fer the meal. So. Yeah. I went to skewl with my sayang dearest. Haa. One thg im afraid is that
we hold hands though we wear our skewl uniform.
Yeah. I do feel uncomfortable doing that.. But he would alwaes want to hold my hand. Hee. But its okay. But wat if my frens spot us. OMG. So yeah. I was missing him like hell just now during chemistry. So i messaged him. Haa. Dunnoe whats rong with me. But sure i do feel tt wae. And i miss his long embracement. And i laughed a lot todae. Thx to fad. Hey. Nice hairstyle gal. LOL. Just kidding okae. No hard feelings okae? So. We camwhore todae. Not much. But pictures wun be posted. Cz my dearest fadiah is LAZY to upload. And it wld be AGES fer her to send it to me via msn. Grr. Hm. Klaa. Fer now. Tts it. Cant blog ani longer. Im tired.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, June 25, 2006


Well. Tis blog seems dead. It`s oni me hu alwaez updating. Well. So. Got nth much to said. I did went out todae. Meet Hidayah. Went to cck. Boon lay. Got her 3 guy frens. They wanted my numberr. But i refused. So any. Just now. There`s deze body builder cum model came to me. He gave his name card. And asked me to kol him. OMG. Its real laa. And sori dayak. Dun be jealous. Im not interested. Anw. Todae is the 25th laa. Dada wanna wish sayang dearest a veri HAPI 4TH MONTH sayang. ((= Okay daa. No need to elaborate. Short and simple.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



So. Yeah. Alas. Im back. My feet is aching LIKE hell. OMG. It was fun todae. My back`s aching. My cheek`s tired of laughing. And my stomach is soo full. So. I went home late. And i just reaches home from a dae of galore. Wee. It`s been soo long since i pamper myself like todae. And i got so many things to blog. But maybe i`ll keep it short. But i have the habits of writting long entry. Wee. I tok a lot. Tt`s why. Haa. ((= So anw. Went out fom house around 11 plus. Wee. I was awaken by them. Gee. U should have mercy on me okay. Im tired laa amy. And i skipped my english class todae. But i met my fwens. So there are amy. Her super-cute guy, mamat. Haa. Acap. Haris. Maggie. Ayu. Sarah. Ifah. And me. So. yeah. It`s havoc. Super kecoh. And nice going out with dem. Planned to go to jurong. And yeah. I`m dark. AGain. Alaaa.. WEnt fer a swim. It was fun laaaaaaaaaa.. ((= Money spent like water. Hmph. So. Reaached there around 1pm. We were like small kids. Haa. And amy and mamat. Doesnt seem like an item. MOre to frens laa sei. But was cool to see dem like that. ((= They get along soo well. And from there. I started to miss my sayang dearest like hell. Tsk. I wish he was dere. But no. That`s not possible. So. We changed asap. Cause we are like jakun kids. Ifah likes to exaggerate. Haa. Tt gerl. And hey. I got the same personality as Haris. Cool uh sei. Was fun. But sth happened. While we were enjoying ourselves in the lazy pool, there`s this group of guys. Taking pictures of me. OMFG. I didnt notice it until Haris came to me. And fcuking hell. Obviously i was MAD. That Haris acted as my 'guy.' He went beside me. Trying to be close to me. But wei. Pls. No wae..... I apprecite it a lot okay. Thx anw fren. But. No wae uh sei. Sayang dearest would be dissapointed if he noes. But i will tell him some dae. But i swear nth happens. Cause i quickly went to amy, sarah and ayu. They became my bodyguards. ((= Thx peeps. So my mood spoilt. Decided to sit around at the 'long chair.' I went alone at 1st. I didnt want to spoil the other`s mood. So i went away silently. Hmm. But i did told dem my whereabouts. So they continue swimming while i was roaming by myself. But suddenly. Few minutes later, Haris came along not far behind me. Walau. That guy. And he was a thoughful fren. He dont want the mats to be a nuisance to me. So he followed me. Ure forgiven. ((= Thx anw. So. We chatted from dere. He asked me lots of questions. Gee. WTH. He asked if im attached. And yeah. I told him i am. Sadly. He appologized. Haa. He told me that he`s feeling guilt fom behaving like that. Trying to make the 1st move and trying to be close to me. So he`s forgiven. Yeah. But at least ure not a despo. I would sae. But i have to admit that he`s nice. But by then, i realised abg wawal`s word. 'Guys will be nice to eu if they have ulterior motive.' Well, it`s true though. So. That`s the major thg that happened while we are swimming. But after that. Im okay. And we decided to swim back. Wee. So. The WAVES are super nice. Played 'shark' in the water. Haa. Funnn laa. So. In there too, there`s this group of guys asked for my, sarah`s, amy`s number. WTH. Im beginning to feel irritated by these merepek stuffs. Kenal-kenal thingy. OMG. Gatal laa sei. Okay. There`s cute guys. Many of them just now. And some of them asked fer my number. But pls lor. Think of it again. If they dare to ask mine number. How many girls b4 me they ever asked? But sarah gave her number to 1 of the cute guys. Haa. I simply said to dem. Im sorri. Im attached o a great gut. Haa. And i walked away. So yeah. They said im sooo sombong. So what? I dun want to betray the trust sayang dearest have in me. So i dun dare to play behind his back. See. Im a good girl. ((= So yeah. And we went home from the complex at 8. Haa. Kene halau laa sei. ((= We are a bunch of notorious kids. But we do have fun. Thx to us. The kecho-RABLE. And to sarah`s suprise. That guy messaged her. And guess what? That guy`s fren. Yg asked fer my number. Asked fer my number again thru sarah. And she told me. And seriously. I said no. Sori laaa. Yeah i noe u said, just to make frens. But. No laa. It`s not rite anw. 1st 1st fren. After that. U never noe? And i dun want because of me and u are frens, somedae. Dada and sayang dearest will drift apart. Pls. No. So i have to think of the possibilities. So after that. We headed to maride parade. Lepak at starbucks. Haaa.. Mak. Bising laa sei kite. ((= The food is nice. I ate spaghetti with extra sauce. And that latte is uhmm. Yummeh. And the price. Fuh. So i spent near to $38 just at the starbucks itself. So yeah. We all looked like spoilt and rick kids. Haa. I admit. The wae we dressed. The wae we present ourselves. So yeah. We planned what to wear earlier on. ((= Those glasses. Hats. Haa. We let down our hair fer a dae. Wee. So. Maggie stil have the energy to shop. Ate New Zealand`s ice-cream. Yummeh. So. And guess hu i saw???? I saw iqah laa. Hmph. She worked at MANGO. OMFG. Hey. Saye nk sei keje at there. Hmph. Tak fair. So i introduce them to iqah. They get along very well. Iqah, one dae i bring eu out with amy and co okay? ((= See. Tt`s my habit. I LOVE to introduce my fren to my other frens. Shiok. Takmu lokek kawan. . . . But sadly, mamat and acap dun realli like iqah`s . I mean. They saw her on 1st impression basis. Well guys. Loosen urself up laa. She`s not bad after all okae. So at parkwae parade. We had fun. I love to go shopping with maggie. Wee. She has great taste. Same as mine. So. I nearly bought myself a LEVI`S super loot cut jeans. But well. I short of $20 bucks. So decided not to. Sheesh. Girlfrens and guyfrens wanted to lend me their money. But i said no. But i want that jeans badly. So maybe not my luck tis tym. It`s okay den. ((= I was happy still after that. So anw. Ifah and co commented that i like to roam myself alone. Wee. Haa. Yeah. Yeah. Several tym. They had to pulled me along with dem. Sweet of those girlfwens. Holding my hand like im one of those small littele kids. Haa. ((= They are afraid that some bad people would come and snatch me away. Haa. How cute kan. But wen we are at ISETAN. I went to the billabong section. While the rest is at the sports section. Guess hu i saw? Hmm. i saw nazri and ejah. MAk ai. Long sei they together. Imagine spending 4 yars with the same guy/girl. Haa. That`s bad. But well. I hope naz and ejah will be happi forever and alwaes. Wee. So naz is such a darling. He bought fer ejah a billabong handbag that cost $59. Fuhh. Yeah. He bought fer her that. Mak. So well. He did said sth that he`s pocked is koyak. Well. Im wondering. Hard ke ade gerl. I mean. Da lots of tym i heard pple commenting that having a girl would cost eu more money. Hmm. *tinking* I should ask sayang dearest about that one dae. LOL. So. Ejah is nice laa. Naz ajak me go out with dem one dae. Fuhh. One dae laa. Im busy laa. ))= SoRi eejah. Agter that. Dada saw mama. Saw mummy tooo. Haa. Hapi working. And hey. I met new fwens. I dunnoe if that person is a guy or girl. Maybe it`s a her. She`s a bootch. Maybe laa.. I myself cant figure her/him out. Flat-chested. But she looks like a girl lor. It all started off wen dada terBUMP into that person. So we talked. But that`s all. That person is working at levi`s Isetan store. Gave me a mini chocolate. Haa. How nice kan. So after shopping. Went to walk around the mall. And i began to wander myself aout at BALENO. At that tym, i was listening to my MP3. Little did i noe that. The promoter there is talking to me. The promter is a guy. I saw his mouth moving.Looking directly into my eyes. But dada taknk paiseh. So i just kept quiet. But this guy reActed like, 'asking me to take off my earpiece.' He was smiling. So i took the initiative to turn around. And guess what?? The colleque. Dunnoe how to spell laa. She told me that her guy fren wanted my number. Oh sheesh. I regret turning around and listening to what she is saying. Grr.. So the promter is chinese. Cute laa. But too bad. Eu canT prove urself better than my sayang dearest within that moment. Haa. So. I just walked away. Hey. I heart my sayang dearest okay. Cucok my earpiece to my ear and went away. Gee. Haloo. U are working but still taking chance to ask fer numbers. WTH. So. Amy saw the incident. She admitted that im a sombong girl. But wei. Too bad. Im sori okay. So todae. Fuhh. I got too many attention from the opposite sex. Gotta admit that. At 1st,, dada feel like woah. But after that. Dada feels sick and tired of it. Lalalala. THe girlfwens and guyfwens too admitted that i do get attention from guys. But not my fault kan... ((= So seriously. It was fun. If oni i gave my numbers. Fuhh. Ramai kawan baru saye ade. IF oni. . . But It`s okae. Im happi with the frens i have. So anw. Dada miss several pple. Dada miss sayang dearest a lottttttttts. Hmph. Didnt see him todae. Until god noes how long till i can get to see him again. And faddie. Saye miss eu. Ouh yeah. Fad told me actually it was our dae out. But wei. Seriously, no1 konfem wit me anythg. N she is like soo mad at me. Hmm. Sori. Sori. WOrds are words oni rite. But that`s all i can offer. Sori. I wonder if they go out still...? Sori ehk shaz. But just now, sayang dearest did kol me. I didnt pick up cause i was still in the pool. My hp was in the locker. So didnt get the chance to pick it up. Im sorri. So he wants to ask me sth. But shy. Wats up sayang? Shoot oni kae. I guess he wants tto lend my mp3? Haa. Or im nor sure lei.... But i did returned his kol ard 8. But he didnt answer my kol. Ape sei. . . . Takpe laa.. Back to those old daes. Lalala. No kol or messages from him. Hmm. So fad didnt message or kol me. Anw. It`s hard fer fad to find me and kol me. Alaaa. Maybe she has got toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo many pple to hog otp with. That`s y. Nvm. Understandable. I give chance laaa. What to do. Long tym tk tok to her otp. Either she`s busy or i am. Ok sori blog about that. Anw. After that ard 10. Head to paya lebar. Went to take mrt. So the dae has ended. Soon to be. And in the mrt. Haris sat beside me. He was like one freak. That moment, he asked fer my number. OMG. Alaa. He said he wanted to make frens je. But he respect that i do have a guy. But still wants to make frens. Saying its not wrong. Well. Yeah. It`s not wrong. But. I dun feel quite rite laa.. So he asked mamat and amy fer help. Amy wanted to give my number behind my back. But alas. She think twice. Acap and co pity him. Pleading me on behalf of haris to give out my number to him. Argh.. No wae. Still. I didnt give away my number. Sigh. Pity him. But i suspected that the girlfrens gave my number to haris. Grrr. Cause ayu look suspicious. And maggie seems guilty. **tinking** Asshole dem. Okay. Sori haris. Yeah. We are frens. But no nid to contact also, we are frens rite. So. THere aint any diff okae. Cheer up fren. ((= So we stick ard till 11 plus. Ard that tym. My mummy ring me. Planning to fetch me and bring me to supper. Togethet with aunt nana, uncle LI. Iffin and Hilmi. Wee. I soo miss Ifin and Hilmi. They are so cute kiddos. And i love them both. Hugs to dem. So they kissed me a lot. And guess what? I kissed iffin sooo many times. Haa. Actually. I wanted ssoooo badly to have sayang dearest to be infront of me. So that i can do the same like how i did to iffin and hilme. Iffin is sooo manje. And that reminds me of sayang dearest. He woulds alwaes hold my hand. Sounds like sayang dearest. LOL. And WAnting to sit on my lap always. So dada layankan his karenah. I wish i could hug sayang dearest like how i hugged iffin. LOL. Okae. Just kidding. But seriously. I do lepaskan my RINDU towards sayang dearest on iffin. But i miss iffin and hilmi too laa.. And wei sayang. I miss eu like hell. Grrr..!!!!!! Miss eu sayang. Miss eu lots. So. We headed to a restaurant called 'HILAL' Yummeh. Filled my stomach with sup tulang. Beef steaks. And nasi goreng Vietnam. And bandong. And ice longan. Gawd. I eat a lot. Ish. Ish. Padahal. B4 that, i ate spaghetti, cookies, ice cream, and pastry uh sei.. Ish. Ish. Eat like pig. So after that. Lepak dere til 12 plus like that. And alas. Here i am. And not. I feel soo sleepy. And i appologised to those hu messaged or kolED me. Sori i didnt pick up okay. And addie. Eu koled me? Sori ehk. Im avoidiing u kols because i`ve promised to my abg wawal to not tok to strangers. Well. I dunnoe eu anw. And sori Raihan. I was busy. My hp was silent. Saye tak sombong laaaa.. And i miss toking to eu laa. Haa. Klaa. Im tired alrd. Tata. Nites. Swit drms. Take care okay. Miss my sayang dearest lots. Miss my bestie. And dada miss my abg pn. . . To hell laa itu. ))= Ouh yeah. Anw. Im counting my daes till my abg nizam come back home. Wee. I sooo miss him okae. Hmm. Yeyeyeye. He`s my fav okae. Wonder how he looks like. Haa. Masih ensem? LOL. Okae i definitely miss him. Counting down. Wee. ((= Gtg. Taa.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, June 23, 2006


So aloha. Been two daes or so since i last blog. Hmm. I simply have got no tym to blog though i have much things to be said. But sadly, now. I`ve got nothing to blog on. Oh well. Let me tell eu yeah what had happened. Actually. Nth much to start off. 23 Junne 2006 Oh well. i met my sayang dearest early in de morning. Hmm. It was so nice being with him. I just want to be with him longer. But too bad, i cant. So i was late. Haa. As usual. And it rained so heavily. We waited fer the rain to stop. So we sat at those stairs. Haa. And wei. I have to admit that he save his own skin oni. Hmph. Eu noe what mean rite sayang. And tt`s bad okae. Next tym i do uh. BLuek!! ((= And. He is determined that he`s not manje. But well. He is one pampered kid. That`s what i notis. Yeah. He is. Haa. Mati2 dun wan to admit sei. Eleh. Kire shy laa. Kan sayang? LOL. Sayang dearest is one manje kiddo. But luckily. He`s not spoiled. Thk god fer that. And hey. Seriously. I do MISS those tym wen i would follow him to the market. He would introduce me to those unfamiliar veggies. Thx fer that. And obviously paiseh lor fer me. Im a gal. But i dunnoe those stuffs. Unlike him. Hmm. Style kan. And i love him much. Even more. ((= So after that. Mit faddie and shaz. Went to the flicks. Wee. It was kinda hilarious. So eu guys. Go catch 'Just my Luck.' Saw nad and her guy. Aww. How i envy them. Shiok kan nad. Haa. Those were the tyms wen im with my abg wawal last tym. Okay stop fretting over the past. But hey. I do envy those couples. Nad and her guy. And Seri and Seth. Hmm. Cute couple. ((= Hey guys. Sori if i blog about eu guys w/o permission. But i meant well larh. ((= After that went Home. Blabla. And raihan did call me. But somehow. The lines been cut off. Hmm. It`s okie den. And im tired. 22 June 2006 So yesterdae. I meet my sayang dearest again. Wee. I love it. It was a short meet up. But hey at least. ((= He has his english lessons to attend. And i accompany faddie. So yeah. I wasted lots of tym. But hell. Hu caRes. Lalala. Didnt get to study cause i slpt the moment i get to class. Lazy me. Ala. I forgot laa what happened. STM. But hell hu cares rite. End here. So That`s it. Ive finish blogging. AND anw. Yesterdae. I sent the rong messages. SupposedLY to fad. But it goes to abg wawal. Grr. That pissed me offf.. Uh freak. Yeah. Cant sleep yesterdae. So i messaged fad. But little did i noe that i sent it to diff pple. And he read those messages. Yeah. I did dreamt about something. But frrom then. I cant go back to sleep. That suck. So. I ate maggi in the middle of the nite. But hey. I didn`t tok to raihan larh eventually. Decided not to. But in the middle of the nite. I received a super long message from abg wawal. Hmm. I read it. But i forgot what it`s all about. But i noe. He did said sth about 'so noe raihan is more important that me' Uh fcuk laa. Wat nonsen. Everybody is important to me. He`s oni a fren, for goodness sakee. Ive got my limits yeah. And hey. Im trying to pick things up from where i left. Trying to be 'setia.' Hey. It`s not that im being unfaithful. But i guess that my pergaulan with the other sex is getting more wider. I realised that. But i noe okae. I dun wanna hurt my sayang dearest. But hey. Abg wawal will alwaes accused me of stuffs. I HATE eu freak fer that. Alaa. Watever laa. Cause i noe that im not like that. Unlike eu. Remember those incidents? I still do. Remember ELLY, mister? See. Hu`s the bad one now. Eh no. Tht was in the past. But still. The scars will alwaes remain. Okay. Im tired of blogging about eu. I`ll just get mad fer no reasons. And tt`s just wasting my bloody time. So. Yeah. We are drifting apart. Yeah. I admit. I do miss eu. Sori sayang fer that. But i hope eu dun get mad at me fer missing him too. ))= I guess eu wun. But anw, let it be tis wae. Slowly. I can get tis over and done with yeah. With the help of someone who i love dearly. Hmm. Love ehk? I dun believe in love actually. Ironic. But well. I do have deep feelings fer my sayang dearest. Tt`s true okae. Klaa. Im done. Toodles. Tata. Sweets. Syasya miss sayang dearest larh. Haa. Gotta catch some slp. Tkcr honey.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, June 21, 2006


Hello. Hmm. Todae WAS fun. I got the chance to meet my sayang dearest. Wee. Well. It was a wonderful thingy. And i love it. BEST laa sei. If oni it was longer. Haa. How much longer. Hmm. Can i be with him forever and never be separated. Haa. LOL. Tt`s bullshit. N never will it happen. I cant get everything i want alwaez. ))= So anw. Dada was with my sayang dearest from 8:05 till 7 plus at nite. Aww. Tt`s like long. But it was short. I have to admit. So anw. Early in the morning. I met him. I was late. 5 minutes late. I`m sorri okay sayang. ((= I have my morning smooches from him. Wee. Haha. No laa. Kidding. So after that. Waited fer Zin to come along. Hmm.. It`s okay. The more the merrier. ((= So after that. Went to buy epok-epok and stufs. Lepak under the block. Okay. I love to waste tym with my sayang dearest. At least, he`s there. And i can crap with him. And the best thing is that. He will layann me. ((= Wee. And i just love eu sayang. So after that. Suddenly, sayang dearest ajak go to airport. Hmm.. What`s rong with him. Haa. So we did went there. B4 tt, et his fwens. And they tag along too. Wee. Nice. Lalala. Klaa. Wun rite in detail. After that, we head to bedok. At the first place, intended to play pool. But eventually. We just laze around at Zin`s crib. Hmm. It wassssssss sooooooooo FUN at there. I mean. Okay. I was super scared at 1st. Thx to sayang dearest. Klaa.. My post gone missing. Anw. To fad. Sori. N Cheer up dear. To abg wawal. Im de same with or w/o u. Im sori. And i miss my sayang lots.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, June 20, 2006


Hello. Hmm. Todae WAS fun. I got the chance to meet my sayang dearest. Wee. Well. It was a wonderful thingy. And i love it. BEST laa sei. If oni it was longer. Haa. How much longer. Hmm. Can i be with him forever and never be separated. Haa. LOL. Tt`s bullshit. N never will it happen. I cant get everything i want alwaez. ))= So anw. Dada was with my sayang dearest from 8:05 till 7 plus at nite. Aww. Tt`s like long. But it was short. I have to admit. So anw. Early in the morning. I met him. I was late. 5 minutes late. I`m sorri okay sayang. ((= I have my morning smooches from him. Wee. Haha. No laa. Kidding. So after that. Waited fer Zin to come along. Hmm.. It`s okay. The more the merrier. ((= So after that. Went to buy epok-epok and stufs. Lepak under the block. Okay. I love to waste tym with my sayang dearest. At least, he`s there. And i can crap with him. And the best thing is that. He will layann me. ((= Wee. And i just love eu sayang. So after that. Suddenly, sayang dearest ajak go to airport. Hmm.. What`s rong with him. Haa. So we did went there. B4 tt, et his fwens. And they tag along too. Wee. Nice. Lalala. Klaa. Wun rite in detail. After that, we head to bedok. At the first place, intended to play pool. But eventually. We just laze around at Zin`s crib. Hmm. It wassssssss sooooooooo FUN at there. I mean. Okay. I was super scred at 1st. Thx to sayang dearest. I overcome it. Yea. Obviously, i fel uneasy. ))= 4 guys and a girl in a house. Lalala. But nth laa eventually. ((= So. The food was nice. Hmmm.. Advice to u all. If u`re shy, u lose out. LOL. But nice uh sei. The ayam and the meat. Fuhh. Maut. ((= And he`s nenek is like super nice. I wish i cld have a nenek like tt. IF oni. So. At zin`s house. Haha. There`s a lot of things that happened. No need to list can? But hey. Dada sue love all those stuffs yeah. I love it bebeh. And i love eu sayang. See. I miss eu alrd. Even wen i beside eu, i did miss eu lots. WTH?! Miss you sayang. I miss my bolster. And thx kae. At least u dun choose me as ur bantal pelok. U said i was ur matair. Weee. I tot u wld choose me as bolster instead. See zin. I won. Bluek. And one dae. Im gonna get u back. Hmph!! Bluek uh. Cetot eu. Hmph. I miss my bolster. If oni i can bring him back home. How savvy. And by then. I can sleep easily. Wahh. Bestye..!!! Hmm. So. Now i noe. That my sayang dearest is MANJE? Haa. I didn`t noe he`s like that. Okay but cute kae. His the LAST wat. So understandable.... Keeke. ((= Tt boi. I love him bebeh. Mwahz!! Can eu stay beside me alwaez. I want eu laa sayang. I wanna hug eu and never let eu go. I wanna. Okay. No comments, Wun blog about tt.((= I wan eu laa sayang. Haa. Eww.. Mushy-mushy. Meluat saye!((= Okay. Im missingg my sayang. Gawd. Help me. Maybe. He`s not gg to skewl. Strg ibe telling me that. Take care kae sayang. So at last. Todae. I shared some of my probs with my sayang. 1st tym laa sei. I dun usually share with him. But i did todae. Pelik. He told me about he`s last tym 'problem'. And i did told him about RAIHAN. Phew. At last he knew. Yeye. So. I noe my limits kae. He`s totally fine with him. As long as i noe my limits. Tt`s what he said. Okay best. See. Ive got such a darling bf. He understands me soo well. And he dun control me toking with guys. HAloo. It`s hard to find guy that enable eu to mix ard with ur guy frens okay. So long. I hope i wun betray his trust. Or else. I`m dead. Thx sayang fer that. So. Now. I dun have to worry about abg wawal being angry at me. See. Sayang dearest has no objections me friend-ING with raihan. Wee.. But anw. He`s a nice guy. Good fren of mine. Oh shit. I miss sayang dearest like hell. So anw. Abg wawal didnt kol me tt dae. I guess. He`s busy msgING with sb else. Fine with me lor. Up to eu laa. Doesnt make a diff if eu control my life back and again cause it`s totally de same. With or without eu. I`m sori i had to say those thgs. But it`s true. Ur words are WANTON honey. Eww.. Siad eu kol. But eu never do. And pls. Dun expect me to kol eu. Cause i never make de 1st move. And tt`s me. And eu had rather message with org lain. U lead ur life and i lead mine. Think back. What`s the use of me giving up ceratin stuffs just fer eu. Where i dun gain anithg. Tt`s it. I dun nid all those study with eu thingy plans. I can study on my own. Thx dear bro. But get lost. Go away. I dun nid eu. Maybe i do. But i dun show. Cause all along. Im doing just fine without eu by my side. So. It doesnt care much if there`s eu ard. So what do i care? Do i suppose to care even? So anw. Tis is fer dear bestie. Wei!! I hella miss eu laa sei. And pls. I appologised okay if i did mistakes todae. Seriously. I didnt noe that u expecting fer my kol. So yea. I feel so lousy. I feel soo bad. U waited fer me. But i was enjoying myself. ))= And there must be sth rong with eu my dear. Tell me okay. We talk about it tml. And pls. I dun wan my bestie to smoke. Enough cause i have a guy hu smoke. ))= I wish upon a star that sayang dearest would quit somedae. So i dun wan eu to be influence. Pls fafad?
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



that`s how i`m feeling right now. seriously. doesn`t it express my boredom? well anyway, that pic was taken yesterday in the car. lol. i was seriously bored plus i got scolded from my mum and yeahh. that shows what the picture potrays. lol. so anyway, if only i knew syaysa wasn`t in school, i wouldn`t have come. i seriously wasted my time. drawing pieces of shits. i only go cos i thought you wanted to see urmmm. u didn`t wake me up thinking i left you in school all alone so i rushed to school. i searched high and low for you but to no avail. i called u numerous time but again, NOTHING. so i gave up. okay i admit i was upset and disappointed and frustrated. but what to do. ohh i learn a new phrase. A SIMPLE 'I`M SORRY' IS THE BEST WHAT A PERSON CAN DO BUT SOMETIMES, THE BEST ISN`T GOOD ENOUGH. that`s true. right right? *i wish i was a punk rock girl with flowers in my hair*

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, June 19, 2006


Hey dude. So i just downloaded the song abg shawal dedicate to me. Ouh. Tsk. Sad song dier. So. Thx awak fer the song. ((= Hmm. So the tittle is Ku Bertanya. Well. It`s a malay song anw. Slow. But meaningful. If oni kan.. What am i to do. Pple. Gee. Can`t blog about that. Hmm. So he gave me one song earlier on too. Nice song laa sei. ((= Sincerely I swear. Hmm. Very meaningful. Veri. And eu. Thx fer that too. Remembere those promises. But it`s oni in my heart. I cant expressed it. And u`ve got to understand it. And u doing great in that. ((= I thank thee fer that. I hold to my promises kae. ((= Anw. I would like to dedicate 1 song to abg wawal saye. Dunnoe from hu laa. But the tittle is. " Everything i do. I do it fer eu." ((= Fer eu kae abg dearest. But hey. Dada love sayang dearest too kae. Love him lots. And dada miss dier. Gee. 2 daes tak tok to him. Hmm. Well. Itt`s okay laa.. Tt`s us anw. ((= Im done.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Ouh well. Been ages since i last bloog. I mean. Tis tym round, i don`t blog anymore. Tt`s sooo unlikeof me huh. The daes where i had also blog has been over. I dont noe y the sudden change in me to stop blogging. So anw. Todae i did went fer skewl. There`s nothing much actually. Just to kill my boredom. And i have my breakfast at burger king earlier on. Hmm.. It`s so yummy. Delicious. But i`m not full eating those. So. I was late. As usual. I overslept. But by then. Shaz and faddie was already there. Sori guys. So. I talked a lot todae. Some nonsentical craps. LOL. But i was having fun thou. So while eating just now. I went out fer a while. And hey. There`s a guy asking fer my number just now. Haa. But i didn`t give. Didn`t tell any1 about tis. Cause i`m too tired to tell faddie about pple kenal-kenal. Gee. Mepek laa.. Got nothing better to do. Ish.Ish. Anw. Dada MISSS sayang dearest laa. Ouh. To those hu msgED me. Sori. Prepaid LOW. So cant reply. Haiz. Pathetic laa use prepaid. I wan my line back. -__-" To my abg wawal. Dada miss eu too. Gee. One dae. Wen i`m free, den can go out. Now. I`m broke. Hee. 19 June 2006 So yesterdae. I talked to my abg wawal dearest on the phone. Yeah. He did reprimand me fer my behaviour. But hey. Dada didn`t give out my number sei to those guys. Okay. Im sori that i went out with her friends. But kite all fren2. Yeah. You are tired of hearing those. Im sorri. But i noe how to take care of myself. I won`t give myself away. And whatever i do, I will alwaes remember that i DO have a guy. And i will remember eu okay. Trust me in tt. So. I heard his nagging. Thx abg wawal. I noe eu care. Those words saying," You. I dun wan u to change because i still want eu to be my matair back. And i dun wan tis syahidah to be my gal. I wan the old her. And tt`s what im trying to do." So im touched by your words. Hmm. U still do love me. A lot though i`m with someone else. Tt`s soo strong of eu. I will try to change. But i did change alrd. But. No one realised. ))= Thx fer making me realised my mistakes kae. So anw. Todae i did went out. With my outside frens. Nice outing. She do have nice circle of frens. Friendly. Cool. ((= She mixes with those 18 and 19 dudes. Woah. She`s young uh sei. But hell watever. They are my NEW frens now. Weee. ((= 18 June 2006 So it`s Saturdae rite..? Err i forgot laa. Maybe i went to arcade. Is it? Before that, Dada went to play pool with faddie. Ok. I suck. Ass. I lose out to her. And what has happened. Grr. I hate to LOSE. I did have a splendid tym. After that, went to play those drums. DAYTONA. Wee. Fun. And i won. ((= And we played several rounds of parapara. Was fun kan. And without realising it. I spent almost all of my money. Tsk. Tt`s sad. And now. I`m BROKE. ))= ANd my heels hurt due to parapara-ING. LOL. 17 June 2006 Dada had nite class. Before that. I skipped my lessons in the morning. Overslept. As usual. And i met faddie ard 12. Went to her house to eat BK. Tapau from dere. And dada watched Scary Movie 1. Ouh well. Its outdated. But hu cares. Funny laaa. And fad`s teaching me craps. LOL. But i did enjoy myself. WEe. And yeay to me. Cause during nite study, I can see my sayang dearest. Dada miss dier laa.. ((= He sat beside faddie. And tt`s close. Yeah! But tak shiok cause hard want to see him. Haa. But at least. After nite study. Me, faddie and shaz went to grab sth fer us to munch. So head to downtown and we ate satay. Ouh. Yummeh!And i bought mee bandong. But i eat a bit oni. Grr. Waste my money!!! Hmph. And i`m broke. We played arcade after that. Ouh ya. We saw FAIDHI..!! Mak ai. Ape daa jadi ngan rrambot kamu sikk..??? Ya ALLAH. LOL. Ok. Im done.

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, June 18, 2006


a l o h a . so today`s the 18 of june. and HAPPY BIRTHDAY AYAH DEAREST`! MUACKS` I LOVE YOU =)) a year older yet still young at heart. lollies. no matter what, i`ll still love u. and ohh! HAPPY FATHERS` DAY TOO`! weeee~ doinks. haha. okay done. 16o6o6- where did i go? cannot remember larh. damn. *brain on work* ohh it was a friday. i had physics lesson at 8 till 10 but it ended 15min earlier so then i decided to do my d&t since syasya didn`t come to school so i tried to occupy my time. i was suppose to go for my d&t til 5 in the evening but me being me, i went home at 1230 straight and didn`t come back to school till 530 for the night study. syasya went to my crib and we ate and watched scary movie 1. yeahh i know the movie is like outdated but hell whatever. we had fun! right syasya? wakakaa. *thinking what i`m thinking syaa?* lollies. so i had a shower and then we left the house at around 4. we headed to syasya`s house and then back to school. after night study, syasya, shaz and i went to downtown east to have out dinner. we ate satay`! yummy`! on the way there, i saw ahmad. it`s been long since i last saw him. anyways, the bus driver was so extremely stoopidd. okay so we wanted to stop at the downtown east bus stop. i can`t remember if we did ring the bell. so the three of us quickly rushed down the stairs and syasya went like "eh uncle, why u never stop?" and the reply goes, "don`t know" lol. stoopidd sia. u mean u can`t see the bus stop or were u sleeping? doinks`. such people. ohh i saw eeeen! haha. it`s been ages since i last saw him. cool. he still look the same thou. we had a small chat. nice talking to him thou. blablabla. went home. 17o6o6- i had d&t just now and then went to the english class. superb boring. i`m glad to say that at least, i`m progressing in my d&t. a step higher which is to get the materials from teacher. hey. at least it`s something. right? so anyway, later at 4, i met shaz and then ad and mas. we went to have our lunch at food culture. and i bloody wasted my cash. the food was tasteless. seriously. it is like as if ur eating the noodle with plain water. no kidding! ask shaz! so mas`s back from australia. thankie for the nougat =)) so then after lunch, we separated and then left shaz and i. we headed to bedok for shaz`s haircut. weee~ what a long wait. but whatever. blablabla. met syasya at east point. woah. the place sure did change! bigger! and i was frantically searching for the washroom. i was so urgent that i couldn`t walk. haha. as soon as syasya came, shaz left. awww. but anyway, syasya and i sure did had fun. we played pool and then daytona and then drums and then para para. weeeee~ stress gone, money also gone. wakakaa~ but we had fun. ohh the day before also we went to the arcade at downtown with shaz after dinner. we played drums and i so bloody wanted to play daytona but the tcard reader wasn`t working so i could also watch syasya and shaz play. doinks` but nvm. so thinking that it was early to be home still, i took bus number 3 which took me home 45 min later. went for a walk at downtown but nothing interesting. doinks -_-" so went home. and my brother`s friend was here. blablabla. now i wanna sleep. okay bye.

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, June 17, 2006


Hey. I`m not on task to blog animore. Maybe the blogging habits have stopped. So anw. I shall blog todae. Finally. Im okay from my illness. Wee. So yesterdae. I did have my nite study. I saw sayang dearest. Yeye. But i sense sth`s rong with him.. Y ehk. . Before that around 1 plus. He asked if i wanna mit him not. Alaaaa.. I want uh sei but too bad i was with my fren at that tym. So decided to give it a miss.. GRR.. If not can see him sei. Anw i miss him. Ok laa. Shall not rant bout it. Tired uh nk blog. Bubbye den. Im gonna go out. Wee. And i loike that boi. Raihan. He`s a darling. Hapi bdae to eu okay. 1 MONTH in advance. ((= Haa. And to ayah faddi. Hapi bdae cik..((= Advanced. N to my ayah and all dad. HAPI FATHER`S DAE. In advance. Ok. im done. Off to go. Tata. ((=
``Syasya

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, June 15, 2006


faddie had a tiring day at school. i was late for my english class just now. as always =) but hey, i`m trying to be punctual already. slowly trying lorr. so anyway, syasya waited for me while i diligently did my d&t. lollies. i got a complain from kwek. she bloody complaint to tan that i haven`t been doing anything since morning. i was still dead okay. nevertheless, i`ve manage to get my material [thou it`s only 2 acrylic rods] and started to work on it. standing at the lathe machine for 2 hours seems like 2 days. i didn`t had enough rest from yesterday. but hell whatever. okay now my mind`s disturbed. i seriously don`t like it when u say but u don`t mean it. whatever larhh ehkk. my parents went to plaza singapura just now. i wanna bloody follow but can`t. blablabla. bolalaa didn`t turn up for tuition today. okay i admit it was boring. boring because i can`t disturb anyone except for belo. wakakka. poor belo. stoopidd. ooppss. okay now i`m interviewing anwar. he`s back!! weee~ but we don`t really talk so it`s not much of a big deal. bolalaa, SUNDAE!! weeeeeee~ okay i`ve got to go now. belo wanna use the comp. tata. I'm a wishful thinker with the worst intentions This'll be last chance you get to drop my name IMU`-

the beauty exposed ;



Oh well. Finally. After 1 week. I am okay from my illness. ((= Wee.. I am sooo super glad. Finally. Abg wawal can bring me out. WEEe. ((= So i did go to skewl just now. How i miss gg to skewl. Haha. And Fer the obvious reason. I miss sayang dearest soo much. Ouh shit. I blog fer a while larh. I still have the cough. N i`ve been coughing non-stop. Tsk. So anw. I have my english lesson. As usual, i WAS late. ((= Early in the morning, i get to eat spaghetti. OUh. Yummeh. Delicious. Hmm.. Thx to faddie`s mom. ((= Thx ehk cik. After tt, Fad went for DnT. I was left in class. But later, sayang dearest msgED me asking if i want to meet him.. ((= Like of course i want. . . Hahaha. So after much persuasion. We met. Fun sei. Aww.. I LOIKE those parts. I want it to go on forever. Y does it stops. Grr. LOL. Dada miss him lor. And hell. I LOVE him. ((= After tt. Kite seperate. But ard 5, he asked want to meet again. Weell. We meet. ((= It was FUUUNN. Spending tym with him. Awww... I want. Neh mind laa. So much of laughter. LOL. He`s cute. Mimicking me. Im sori sayang i bit eu. Im sori dear i pinchED eu. Im soo sori k sayang. But i love eu still. And i miss u byk2. Mwah3. ((= Klaa. Da. Wanna watch Spore Idol. Wee... Hadi soo kewt. Anw. Ive got a new job. Starting from daes back. Dada`s been helping shawal to wake up in order fer him not to be ate fer skewl. Kewt laa dier. Said he MISS me. I miss him too.. Miiss eu kae.. I`ve got a date with him somedae. Wonder if sayang dearest will let me go out with him. I noe he will approve. Cause i noe tt sayang dearest is sooo understanding. He don`t control me. And thx dear fer that. LOVE EU bebeh.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, June 14, 2006


GREAT. i lost my entry i wrote previously. ohh well. shit happens. syasya`s been sick for almost a week. that`s superb long. i hope she`s already feeling better. let`s trace back to the past. o8o6o6- marks the day when that tragic incident happened. shall not report about it. anyway, faddie, belo and bolalaa went to play XBOX at downtown east and yeahh! i won bolalaa in PROJECT GOTHAM twice! weeee~ okay shall not brag about this anymore. bolalaa, are you up for daytona? weeee~ *evil laugh* so anyway, dre came to meet me and then i separated from belo and bolalaa. we only met again when some tragedy struck. okay i won`t elaborate more. 13o6o6- faddie went to Johor with family after school. initially, i had to go down to HQ for some matters but can`t. okay whatever. it`s been 6 whole months since i last entered malaysia. yeahh. that`s long. so once we reached malaysia, everyone was complaining of hunger. so we decided to eat at FLINSTONE BISTRO. yummy. i ate a lot. and i mean. A LOT. shall post up the pictures sooner or later. after eating, i couldn`t get up. honestly. i walked slow and steady. after a while, i told my mum that i wanna take a walk and i saw this green top. ohhlaalaaa~ it`s damn nice and it`s fagging cheap! RM49.90. i so wanted that top because i`m short of clothes, like hello! but unfortunately, as always, i never get what i want. so i didn`t speak to my mum. hey! i didn`t follow them to KL for shopping and u didn`t get anything for me. compared to my siblings, they get what they want. it`s so unfair! but nvm. lesson to be learnt: always and i mean ALWAYS bring your own cash. damn. i always forget that. so remind me before i go overseas. so yeahh. eventually, i got NOTHING for myself except for one thing for sure that i`ll get what i want: FOOD. seriously. at least =) 14o6o6- slept and my granny`s crib. her tables and chairs made from steel got stolen. it`s damn heavy and i wonder how people could carry them all the way up the high gates. damn those people. out of all things. 4 chairs and 1 table. that`s the place where i used to sit if there`s any crisis going on cos i will tend to get out from the house and sit outside. well, that`s me. so anyway, as always, i`m always the last one to wake up. so i didn`t do anything except sleep, eat, watched dvd and played the swing. that`s all. and then when the clock struck 8, it`s time for us to leave. we went to this mall just to buy dvds. again, i didn`t get what i asked. fcuk that. but it always happen to me so i`m kinda used to it. again, they get what they wanted. nvm it`s okay, smile faddie. so to only satisfy my wants, i asked for food. went to mc donalds to eat all thanks to the small kids. i wanted to eat at secret recipe but then again, understand understood okay. i reached home at 1 in the morning. we were stucked at custom due to traffic congestion for one and a half hour! it got me restless and frustrated. in the car, i kept on making this noise that helps me to release my frustration slowly. so i only had a few hours of sleep before school starts. it was mrs neo lesson and little did i realise, i was late. all thanks to my watch which shows 15min late! being stoopidd, i followed my watch. damn. we had literature test. damn. it was hard. why? simply because i didn`t study. i even forgot there`s test. wakakaa. i`m expecting to get a single digit mark. argh. i was disturbed okay. after much hearing about being lock up thingy. it really frightened me. i hope the case will be closed by this week? finally, i told my mum what happen. if not, she`ll be wondering why i`m called by cops. okay shall not elaborate about this again. so now i`m blogging! i`m tired. doinks. zZzZzZz. t0 syasya dear: TAKE CARE OKAY!! I MISS YOU LOADS!! DO GET WELL SOON OKAY!! *hugs&kisses* t0 dre: TAKE CARE TOO OKAY!! GET WELL SOON!! don`t think about what has happened anymore. let it go okay? =) t0 bolalaa: daytona aye? wakakaka`! so looking forward. weeeee~ t0 the rest: faddie <3s euu! *smooches*

the beauty exposed ;



Been ages since i last blog. Anw. Too many controversy between reader(s) and our blog entrIes. Haa. LOL. So anw. Todae has been the SIXTH dae dada`s down with the fever and flu epidemic. I sure hate those. I yearn to recover and go to skewl like my friends. So let me cut shrt. Dada must be hardworking enough to eat my ubat. As my abg wawal TERSAYANG has promised me. He will bring me out once i recovered. And wee. He will bring me out frrom morning to night. He wants to spend the whole dae with me. Gee. Im waiting fer that auspicious dae to come. ((= I swear my abg wawal has been looking after me since im sick. So i DID listen to all his advices in order fer me to get well and enjjoy a DAY with him. And thx a lot fer that k. I love eu DEAR abg.((= Eu still do CARE. I`m TOUCHED. And to sayang dearest.. Dada miss eu larh.Ok im done.Counting down. and AM still counting though.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, June 11, 2006


I hear... a voice say "Don't be so blind"... it's telling me all these things... that you would probably hide... am I... your one and only desire... am I the reason you breath... or am I the reason you cry... Always... always... always... always... always... always... always... I just can't live without you... I love you... I hate you... I can't live without you... I breathe you... I taste you... I can't live without you... I just can't take anymore... this life of solitude... I guess that I'm out the door... and now I'm done with you... I feel... like you don't want me around... I guess I'll pack all my things... I guess I'll see you around... Inside... it bottles up until now... as I walk out your door... all I hear is the sound... Always... always... always... always... always... always... always... I just can't live without you... I love you... I hate you... I can't live without you... I breathe you... I taste you... I can't live without you... I just can't take anymore... this life of solitude... I guess that I'm out the door... and now I'm done with you... I love you... I hate you... I can't live without you... I left my head around your heart... Why would you tear my world apart... Always... always... always... always... I see... the blood all over your hands... does it make you feel... more like a man... was it all... just a part of your plan... this pistol's shakin' in my hands... and all I hear is the sound... I love you... I hate you... I can't live without you... I breathe you... I taste you... I can't live without you... I just can't take anymore... this life of solitude... I guess that I'm out the door... and now I'm done with you... I love you... I hate you... I can't live without you... I love you... I hate you... I can't live without you... I just can't take anymore... this life of solitude... I pick myself off the floor... and now I'm done with you... Always... Always... Always...

the beauty exposed ;



Holla. It`s me. Syasya. Ouh well. Been very busy lately. So i didnt have the tym to blog. Anw. I was down with a fever on Fridae. My temperature was high. 39.1-39.4 to be exact. Tsk. Grr. I just HATE to be sick. The feeling sucks. So let me recap. FRIDAY As usual. I did have skewl on tt dae. N dada went to skewl with my sayang dearest. Wee. ((= Ouh yah. On thursdae. Dada went to skewl with him too.((= So. I guess i got it all mixed up. I cant remember. I tink Thursdae i went to beach with fafad. Isit? Was fun at there. Suddenly, i got a phone kol from sayang dearest. ((= I find it weird. Did zin said anithg to him...? But it`s a good thg though.((= Anw. Back to fridae. We were caught in the rain. Lucky it rained. At least i got to spend more tym with him. Wee.((= Fer the nite clas. Tot i dun wan to go. But i have to cause i dun wan faddie to be alone after whatever that has been revolving ard her. Saturdae So. I skipped English lesson cause i was real sick. Cant even stand. And i was on bed fom morning till the next dae. I woke up just to have my daily dosage. And abg wawal called me ard 12;50am. But i was alsp by then. Hmm. I was awaken by faddie`s message. ((= Miss eu larh. Sori i didnt kol eu ok. If im okay, i kol eu.I hella miss eu.((= By then, i have to eat by medicine. Shh. I vomit out my flu medicine. Lucky fer me. My dad didnt find out. Sundae So. Here i am. Feeling better than yesterdae. But i still do nid those rest. I did talk to my sayang dearest otp just now. I did tok to my abg wawal otp just now too. Abg wawal told me if tml im okay he wants to brg me out. Wee.((= We shall see how okay. As i sum everythgs up. I hate to be sick. And hey i miss my sayang dearest. If not. Yesterdae i get to see him sei. Hmm. Because im sick. i wouldnt be able to go out. Anw. Sya realised a change in him. *tinking* But i loike him now. Haa. Whtever it is. I loike him. ((= And i was truly hurt by wat abg wawal said on that fridae. Screw him larh. Tsk. I cried at paris interchange. Eww. No shame. . . But i`ve recovered by his laments. I AM adapting to his changes. Yeah. Have to admit that he has changed. He likes to raise his voice now. N im pissed at that. His wae of speaking is far diff from b4. He words are more harsher than b4. Ish. Ish. Neh mind. I hope he will realised it one dae. And to faddie. U tkcr alrite. I hope im okay by tml so i can meet eu.. Wee. N hey i miss eu loads lor.. Grr. I tot i wan to ajak eu eat LJS. But tink again. My temperature is on the loose now. DAMn tis laa.. Its okay laa. U must. Must. Tkcr okie. U still have me. ((=
Till den
``Syasya-

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Saturday, June 10, 2006


faddie`s bored. i had school just now. went home straight and then went to bed up till 5pm. if not for the phone call, i won`t wake up. so after i got up, hog on the phone for a while and then had a shower. i went to follow both my parents to beach road to buy dinner-sop tulang. yummy. on the way home, i had complain to my dad about my spectacles and then he brought me to the shop. without questioning me why or whatsoever, he scolded me and blamed me for troubling him for going to the shop when there`s practically nothing wrong with me. but hey! i`m not an optician or whatever. i`m just saying that it`s new and i felt rather unconfortable at first. arg. and all the way home, my ears were filled with naggings. yeahh. from a small little tiny matter into a huge one and now my parents ain`t speaking. great! okay another thing is that. do u ever realise when someone close to u is leading a perfect life and urs is way exactly the opposite of hers meaning ur life is imperfect, miserable and the list goes on. but sometimes, that does happen. seriously. when that someone is happy, ur`s the opposite. complete opposite. it`s like what goes around comes around. yeahh. ohh i only managed to catch the first half of the match and then i felt sleepy. as i stood by my phone, nobody holla at me. poor me. and when i silent my phone, people try to reach me. freak. `la la love ya_ <3

the beauty exposed ;

the beauty exposed ;



how come people are all getting sick? syasya`s sick. she`s down with high fever. GET WELL SOON SYASYA DEAREST! *muakx* my brother`s sick. he`s been vomitting for the past 2 days. GET WELL SOON TOO BRO! hmmm. so anyway. had english class just now. was superb boring. seriously. yesterday while having night study nana called me. she asked me to tag along with her at town. but but too bad. i had night study. kwang kwang kwang. i`m traumatised by what happen. yes, until now. seriously, i cannot get the picture/scene out of my head. it keeps on replaying. but luckily, he`s okay. GET WELL SOON okay. arg. i`m tired. and double bored.

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, June 08, 2006


the beauty exposed ;



on drums aye? -_-"

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faddie&shannbelooo__ =))

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syasya*faddie__

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Wednesday, June 07, 2006


a l o h a. i`m home sweet home. i went to the beach with syasya dearest. weeee~ i loved it when we shouted our lungs out. weeeee~ so now we have a new solution if we`re stress. bluek! can`t tell uu. lalalaa~ i was punctual for class today. all thanks to him =)) who waited for me long i guess so my initiative thought me to rush but damn. i forgot to bring my sweater and i was practically freezing in the AVT during literature lesson. but hell whatever. we had fun at the beach. weee~ social studies lesson was totally a bore but it ended half an hour early thou. cool. syasya wasn`t there so i slept in class. i was darn bored so i decided to call najib[who`s sitting beside me] on the handphone. and without me reasling it, his phone went "BEEP!" i was like 'ohh shitt. what have i done?" and then teacher was like straing in our direction saying she wanna confisicate the hand phone but she didn`t. i`m sorry okay bijan? weee~ since social studies class ended early, i went up to f&n room to see how`s syasya was doing. fyi: she`s cooking for her o levels. it smelled nice. really really. if possible, i`ll post the pixies. weeeee~ so life`s been fcuked up lately. but it doesn`t matter much. so anyway, syasya and i went to eat at 24 hours coffee express. we had mee pataya and it was freaking spicy than always. however, i got mad when there`s this bunch of boys throwing ice at my back.[i was sitting directly in front of them] i got frustrated and gave a stare and one guy went like "he asked for ur number" and gave a smile

the beauty exposed ;



a l o h a. i`m home sweet home. i went to the beach with syasya dearest. weeee~ i loved it when we shouted our lungs out. weeeee~ so now we have a new solution if we`re stress. bluek! can`t tell uu. lalalaa~ i was punctual for class today. all thanks to him =)) who waited for me long i guess so my initiative thought me to rush but damn. i forgot to bring my sweater and i was practically freezing in the AVT during literature lesson. but hell whatever. we had fun at the beach. weee~ social studies lesson was totally a bore but it ended half an hour early thou. cool. syasya wasn`t there so i slept in class. i was darn bored so i decided to call najib[who`s sitting beside me] on the handphone. and without me reasling it, his phone went "BEEP!" i was like 'ohh shitt. what have i done?" and then teacher was like straing in our direction saying she wanna confisicate the hand phone but she didn`t. i`m sorry okay bijan? weee~ since social studies class ended early, i went up to f&n room to see how`s syasya was doing. fyi: she`s cooking for her o levels. it smelled nice. really really. if possible, i`ll post the pixies. weeeee~ so life`s been fcuked up lately. but it doesn`t matter much. so anyway, syasya and i went to eat at 24 hours coffee express. we had mee pataya and it was freaking spicy than always. however, i got mad when there`s this bunch of boys throwing ice at my back.[i was sitting directly in front of them] i got frustrated and gave a stare and one guy went like "he asked for ur number" and gave a smile, pointing to his innocent looking friend. but i didn`t entertain them. bunch of childish fellas. so yeahh. now i`m home. i bumped into bolala at downtown but we were ignorant. we didn`t say anything at all. but whatever. lalalalaa~ okay then. i wanna have a shower. t o o d l e s ` !

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Holla. I have got no mood to blog. And so. I realised that pple have been bitching about us. MOFO. And hey Mt. Stop those craps complaining about me to other people can? Its my blog! So i have te rite to blog about who ever. And nk terasa da bla uh. -_-" LAME laa.. Puki mak btol. Pasal ko. Aku kene blog secret-secret. CB. Anw. Kau ingat aku kisah? Jalan da.. Aku akan tetap blog. And ko sibok sagat bace blog aku buat aper?</ Anw fad. Go read gegerl`S blog. Boboy hog otp with gegerL laaa.. Sheesh. Ok. Im being rather pathetic. FUCK him laaa.. Okay he called me. But give it a missED. So. He`s happi. Now. With gegerL. ))= Tinge of jealousy seeps into me. Tsk. Okay. Maybe. This is his U TURN of his promises. Grr.. Okay. No use blabbering. So i have to face it. Patince pay off. Maybe laaa.. Fuck sei dier. Oh well. Now i noe y he didn`t contact me. Lalala. Ok. I do have frens rite anw. So yeah. RAIHAN called me yesterdae. But dada scared sei fad. Earlier on. He tersalah type to me. "U da kene. Boleh laa. Buat pakai jek." Mak wat he meant? He said he teersalah conversation. But if he tok to gerls. Like tt ehk? Ouh ouh. Im scared. So i skipped skewl todae. Gt practical. N im scared laa.. ))= Fad. Aku miss boboY. Aku miss BoboY. Mcm mane raseye bile kau miss org tu tapi he`s not there animore? Tsk. Tsk. So anw. Smlm. Tok otp with him. Okay. We hog about 2 hrs plus? Wee. Was fun. But hey dada worri bout him a lil. Anw. Pls keep ur promise and i will keep mine. Don`t worri. Ouh yea. Fafad. I shared what i tink about my relationship with some1 alrd. He asked me to tokk to my guy. Maybe -u sae cute- is not serious about this thingy. That`s what my fren said uh. I nid to talk to him. Tts what my fren said. But i cant. Im not daring enough. So da laa. Tts all. Hey Im feelling bad. Fad. Can i cry on ur shoulder..? I nid him. I miss him. ))= Yeah. Kite daa not together but tak salah kan fad.... Tsk.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, June 06, 2006


peek a boo i see u. lalalaa~ i just reached home. i had dinneer outside with my family just now. yummy yummy. okay. so now let me let this out, fucking bitch. we don`t belong to the name bitch. it really doesn`t suit us. well, allow me to say about u. MT. why would u wanna bloody pretend in front of ur parents that u are wearing a scarf but u bloody take it off once they`re out of ur sight. don`t go around spreading rumours and bitching about other people okay. well, ur more or less the same, yeahh. i still haven`t get enough of u yet okay. so i shall continue later. just watch ur back. wakakakakahaha!

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, June 05, 2006


Holla. Im back from skewl. Actually since just now. But i was too busy to blog. So yeah. Now here i am. So anw. My camp at faddie`s house was great. I was out till like around 1;30 in the morning on the 1st day. And 3;30 on the second dae. Crazy. But anw was fun. Lucky us that there arent any police patrolling ard dere. IF not. Im in dead shits. LoL. Lying to my parents saying. WTH? Keke. So i wun be lying fer the next two daes. So it will balance off. Haa. Nonsen. So anw. Yesterdae i went to play pool. With faddie. I lost. HUrhur. And i need to treat her fer that. Nah its okay. There`s alwaes next tym. And yesterdae, Faddie went my house. Ate our VERY late lunch cum dinner. Sup tulang got burnt. Kwang3. And. Hey. Ive received a call from abg wawal. Suprised. But whatever. Ive adapt to such situaton. Haa.. Wee. So yesterdae. We met fer a while. Faddie`s there too. It`s been long since we hang out together. I mean the three of us. SO. He wanted to meet me. Well. Its a last minute thingy. So we did. Anw, Its been long since we last met. He did said that he wanted to hug me. In order to vent his missingNESS. I mean to lepaskan HIS rindu. Hurhur. I wish i cld do that. But. But. i I wish i cld hug sayang dearest. Hurhur. But. But. U see. Anw. I did miss my abg wawal sooo much. But he wasnt there. He`s gone missing fer like several daes. So i told him. Hey. Im not ur scapegoat okay..? Its like u want a hug, u come to me. I feel like. Hey. U tink i a doll? U can easily play around with me. Like it u play. Bored of it u go. LOL. Well. Im not like tt. So its good that im trying to move on w/o eu. Trying. But still, I alwaes kp my promise yeah. ((= Hmm. So abg wawal said i changed. Wee. Based on his facial expression. He`s happi with the changes. But i dun realise it larh. To the positive sides ke? WEe. Im trying okay.. ((= And he did sae to me. "IF oni u remain like this. And i can get eu back." Everythings being translated, btw. Hmm. ALA. His words=WANTON. So. I was happi that i get to see him. At least i can get to meet the person i miss rite? Okay thx fer that. But hey abg wawal. U told me to stop with those kenal-kenalan thingy. Hey. Its not me hu start it off anw. They come to me. But did i pass my number to dem. NO! But i noe. Out there u are kenal-kenalING with all those gerls. Said eu wouldnt want to even noe those minahs and wild gerls. But eu do. Looks can be deceiving huh? And yet again u lied. Ur words=WANTON. I`v said it earllier. I hope that one dae. U will be togethe with someone that is a minah cum wild and older than eu. And tt`s wen i will laugh my ass off. Said those stuffs to me wen im with sayang dearest rite. If the dae cums. U will get ur retributions. And from there, I will dclare that age does not matter. ((= And i didnt tell sayang dearest about my meet up with him. Im sorri. But trust me. Im good. Anw. Its last min thingy. See abg wawal. Anythg that concerns eu, it will come to me back eventually. And anythg about me, it will comes back to eu. Grr. Sometimes, its frustrating to hear what pple sae and commenting about eu. Somehow. It still affect me larh. But i 'pekakKAN' telinga. Its your life. ((= But whatever.. Yeah. Just now. Otw home. Dada make new frens with tis guy. Seriously, i have got no idea hu he is. But he sat beside me. At first he sat two seats away from me. Well. He talked. Sae hello and stuffs. Being friendly, i replied to his conversation. Was fun. As if i noe him lyk tt. But i dont. Hmm. Yeah. Ive go a new fren todae. His name is CASH. Anw. He`s INDIAN. Yeah. Serious. I dun lie. . . Hmm. So poovan or rathi. U want to noe him..? Feel free to tell me. Jk2. Hmm. So faddie remind me to beware. She told me that ive been making frens with strangers. Hey fafad. I dun give out my number uh sei. Im not lyk tt. Those hu msg me thru my hp. I dunnoe where they get my number from. Maybe its those prank messages to test im setia or not. LOL. I never noe. Hmm. So tts all i shall update. The rest. Lalalaa. Hey. Im goona miss sayang dearest. He wun be using his hp again. . Mabye. Not sure yet. Laa. And hey zin. Pls.Pls. Look on the bright side of life okay? Pls.
``Syasya-

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Sunday, June 04, 2006


aloha. faddie`s finally awake. lollies. it`s 1.15pm. look, i sleep like a pig. seriously. ohh well. i`m tired. so yesterday, dada and I played pool at bedok. before that we had our late lunch at s11. we ate yong tau fu[whateverthatspells] but still, not full. as always. *winks* so then to bedok we headed with saha too and we played pool. to me, it seems like a dull game, mot much laughter. and then it was nearing 7 which supposedly, dada and I should be in school for PASSING OUT PARADE. waited for 28 was like as if waiting for another millenium to come. so we decided to take a cab and so we did. lalalaa~ again, the POP thingy was suppose to end at 10 but it ended an hour late. it was saddening to see that some people teared. hmmm. okay whatever. so i apologized to ahmad that i met him late. but it`s not my fault. anyway, we were SUPPOSE to meet at esso bus stop and then to downtown and then to the car park at downtown and then to the beach. initially, i have already had plans and i promised my friend to meet him after this the POP. but u see, i cancelled it just to meet him. i really felt guilty. argh. was so fucking stress yesterday. seriously. i had no one to turn to because i know i involved them and then everything is being blamed on me. fuck. i didn`t know SHE cannot be trusted. u have such a big fucking mouth. u idiot. do u know how it feels to be backstabbed? ohh well, sometimes i`m revengeful u know, so what i can say is BEWARE. well, don`t ever think that a guy will love or like u once he does. just fucking move on can? u cannot possibly wait for him for ages right? well, good luck to u if u do, okay idiot? this feeling of hatred it building inside me. ohh well, all thanks to u, idiot. i`m not trying to bitch about u but it`s the fact. kwang kwang kwang. sorry for all the rude remarks people. okay great. when i`m awake, dada`s asleep. now i`m feeling like how she felt earlier that she can`t talk to me. lonely.... hmmmm. i was in serious shit yesterday. one thing is because this so called love thingy. another thing was that my guinea pig cage capsized. lol! but serious! and i almost cried because both the guine pig went missing! so i hesistated and felt so afraid that it would die. and finally, i was under this cupboard. with the help of my dear dada, we succesfully brought it back to its cage. weeeee. hmmm. kaylarh i wanna clean my ro0m. tata!

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Holla. Todae last dae of camping. Tsk. Borin sei later. Grr. So. Im left with not muchmoney. Asked my ayah to bank in money fer me. But he said no. Sheesh. Okay. Maybe we are going to play pool. Yeah. Oklaa. Anw. Al de pictures kene deleted. Grr. So i post new pics on frester. Wei. Dada miss abg wawal lor. Mane ntah dier. Fine. i remain as i am. Dun blame me okay? Klaa. Im done. Tata. Catch up with eu soon.

``Syasya-

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Holla. I`m still awake uh sei. See the clock. Tsk. Eyes soo sleepy. So anw. I reached faddie`s house about 3:30 in the morning mind eu. Ish. Ish. Terok sak. Holla. We ARE girls uh sei. So. Dada went out about 3 in the after noon. Ard 4 larh. Went to eat yong au foo. Yummeh. ((= But not that kenyang laa.. We ate at s11. ((= So. Dada and Faddie woke up LATE. I woke up at 11? And we skipped our ENGLISH lesson. Tsk. And Miss Yeap kol uh sei. And i copied Faddie`s reason. Which is. I got a diarhorea? Hakz kene tipu. Hmm. Anw. Tadi b4 klua. I tok otp with Zin. Mak lame sei. ANd hey. Cheer up okay? Pls. Pls. I suspected hu told eu. And well. Correct laa.. Tak tau pape sei.. Anyhow oni. I noe faddie best. But i wun reveal her secrets. Fren ape sik gitu..?! Cb! So we siap2. Head to s11 and meet sarha dere. After tt, head to bedok for a game of pool. ((= Pavilion has been closed dddddown due to renovation maybe. Alaa.. We play chop2. Saw dimple n zin. Glimpse of them. Afetr that head to skewl fer our POP. hMM. Waitkan 28 ye lame. Den we took taxi. Tapi wait fer sooo long. Bloody hell. Grr! So wen we reach skewl. There`s buffet waiting fer us. ((= Eat like pig. Haha. Lapar sik. Nice laa The food. Pasal FREE.((= The show was MEREPEK. And sad seh. I tear uh sei. Tsk. After that. Head to beach. Mak. Was left alone. Sigh. Lonely. And i was darn bored. DAMN bored. But patience is the keyword. . Faddie tok with zin. Sigh. Da cheer up okay pple..((= Smile kwn-kwn. So i was restless. Laa. panjang sei story. Cut short uh. At beach. There`s dimple, acap, quennie and their fren. IF oni sayang dearest was there. In my dreams uh. . .Haa.. So. It was bored laa overall. I spent 2 LONG hours keeping quiet. Sigh. Me n quiet. Eww. So not me.. Then ard 2 plus, went to cheers. After that, me n fad went to mac. Buy food. Den procedd to beach. Ate ice cream. And skali i remembered thsose tym wen dada cried coz of wawal thgy... Remember? Tsk. After tt, head home. N now here i am. Sleepy uh. N hey. Terkejot sei. Guinea pig cage was capsized!! OMFG!! Me and fad panicked. Okay Im doine. Want to slp. Tata.
``Syasya-

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Saturday, June 03, 2006


Holla. Im at faddie`s house. Fuh. It`s 2;15 in the morning mind eu. Faddi`s otp while watching tv. While im blogging. Anw. I smelled FRESH. Fad have not taken her shower. So lazy. Grr. Smelly gerl. Kwang3. Oklay. So todae i spent like 17 hrs with dearest faddie. And we were out since 8;30 in the morning. And we are super exhausted. Lalala. Early morning. Went fer LITERATURE class. Were late as usual. Faddie waited fer me like 30 mins? Den we wwent fer CHEMISTRY. Late as usual. ((= After that went out fer lunch at BK. Were LATE fer MALAY lesson.((= And we declare ourselves as the STAR KARAT. Wee. After malay. Met andre. Faddie met. Pass CD. So my compliments. He has a good taste in his dressing. Holla good fer u. ((= Hey. Attention. FAD KENTOT. JUST FEW SECONDS AGO. Kwang3. LOL. AND SHE BEGGED ME NOT TO MALU HER. LOL. Okay daa..After that. Went to take bus rides. Just to waste tym laa..((= Proceed to nite study. As usual. We were late. Haa.. Anw. Sayang dearest told me his eyes pain. Hmm. Take care alritez. Dun wear laa ur contact. Hmm. Tu laa nak hansem kan. Kan mate sakit.. Take care.. He told me that he`s otw but wait ye wait. 6;30 den he reached. Ler... Just tot of saying. LIARS GO TO HELL. Luckt im patient enough.((= Okay. So i didn`t see much of him. I feel rather uneasy. Laa.. Okay put that aside. I dun layan him sangat. Cause i replied to his messages late. And it is LATE. Sori ehk. I did that because of some reasons. I hope that somedae u will feel how i felt. Somedae. Patience will pay off. Don`t eu tink? Klaa. After tt. Went bbq. Siti ye. Together with faddie, shaz, ali and sopek.((= FUN. Can get free food. Wee. The chicken is absolutely nice..!!! So thx saha. Fer that bicycle. Was fun kan fad? Hee.. Wee. So now. Im having CAMP at faddie`s crib. Hope my parents wun find out. ((= Friday, sat n sun. 3 daes in total. Hmm. Hey. Dada miss my abg wawal. Lots laaa...... Where is he? I hope he`s doing fine. MISSeU. And Dada miss sayang dearest. But fer that. It`s gone case liao. I wun gain anythg. So no use ranting. Fuck. And hey dada got limits. Tink uh. Put urself in my position can? Sooner or later, i will burst. Tsk. Tata. I wanna watch vcd..((= Nitez.
``Syasya-

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Thursday, June 01, 2006


Holla. Okay. I was wondering. Why the hell my dearest fren starting with S and end with an I doest msg me nor did he called me fre the past 2 daes? Hmm. Faddie told me that he LIKE me. Grr. Pls laa. I hang around with u guys. That doesnt mean that you have to like me uh. Hmm.. Get a hold of urself. Anw. U are not a good boifren material. I heart my sayang dearest ler. ((= Followed by abg wawal n faddie. Nono. They 3 all de same.((= Fair. Keke. So. I appologise okay if i do give eu hope. Maybe i gave false hope. But i cant remember all those stufss lor. Im ur fren. N u are my fren. Tt`s it. Im sori. But. Hey. Dada dun wan tis to affect our frenship uh. Promis we will and still be fren? Remember those prom nite thingy? SSaid u had go with me to prom? Haha. I will consider still. But i just hope that i can get the chance to go with my own boi? Which is i hope i will go with my sayang dereast? Hmm. Fat hope laa. Drm on laa gal.. Okay Im done yacking. Lalala. Sori k kwn. Frens stil. . . . ? Yesh kan? Wee.... Sori. Sori.((=
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Okae. Dada`s Back from skewl. Hmpghf! Kena halau laa. Haa. Mr Tan halau. Tsk. Tsk. Okay watever. I promised to myself that i will be good and will update my assignmernts starting from todae. Hee. Like real. Keke. Dada try laa.. Hmm. And starting from todae. Dada will try to change okay? Insya Allah. Amin. Doa kan kite k..? I did tis fer my own good and fer the sake of my two loved ones. They noe me best. (Faddie and abg wawal.) ANd the other reason is that dada dun wan to lose my abg wawal. As in he wants my old self. Da laa. I still wun try to contact him. Just doakan he baik-baik jek. His famiy too. Dada miss nuruL. Ok watever. I hope she`s doing alrite. ((= So from now. My mind will be crystal clear from anithg. I hope soo. HAA. And soo. Hey. Dada mit new fren again. Eshak and addy? Sape sik. LoL. Fadie. Salah tak if dada make new fren. They come to me... But i noe the old dada wun be interested in tis thg kol kenal-kenal thingy. But.. U decide k? Thx dear. Oklaa. I`ve got to stop blogging and do my stufs.. Wee.. Anw. Dada saw my sayang dearest tadi. Wee.. Yesh uh. He smiled laaa.. But skejap jek. Haa. As usual larh.. Bisu? Hmm. Ok. Fer time being, he`s not my priority kae. They ar.--> Studies. Assignments. Parents. And my three loved ones. ((= U guys noe hu u r..((= Hmm. Klaa. Gtg. Toodles. But. Tak salah kan klu dada sae i miss sb? Hmm. Its hard trying to change to be ur old self.. But chiayou. Dada can make it. Just fer those two. Esp him. . . . ((= N fer me. Wee. Okay. Im crapping. I miss abg wawal. It`s been like3 or 4 daes he didnt beep or ring me. N i dun wan to find him. I have myblog. If cant take it, i just imagine tt`s him okay. I dun wan the two hims to follow me. I mean haunt me in my dreams...Though i miss dem much. ((= Taaaa- Tkcr.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



PHUCK! Im sleepy to go to skewl. Faddie still zzzZz. Kwang3.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Holla. Im in deep shits. Tt`s what i`ve got for not handing up my work. Halo? Im not on task fer my fnN uh sei. I hate it. Ewww... So i will be having o level practical todae. Im scared. What am i suppose to cook? Sayang dearest teached me to do salad and carrot cum apple fruit juice. Mak.. Paiseh man. He , a guy noes a lil bout cooking. Me?! WTH?!! Haha. Okay. So yesterdae dada hog on the phone with sayang dearest. Ok it`s been long since we did that. Yeah. He did sae. If oni i can see you. Hmmm. IF oni. Lalala. But at least i get the chance to tok rite. Wee.((= So i was awake. Early. Sayang dearest wake me up. Haha. I hope i get to bump into him later. But i noe wun. Hmm. Im scared ler... For the practical later. Hmm.. Sumbat oni larh. Klaaa. Nth much to said. Im done.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, May 31, 2006


hello hello. i was first irritated because when i was sleeping for like an hour, i received 10 miss calls. all from different people. okay so lots of people ask me out for movie. but i`m sorry, i can`t. may be next time. ohh yesterday, just as i stepped out from my gate, i heard people making cat sounds. then i heard "fadiah!" i turned and i saw jamie. weeeeee. it`s been long since i last saw him. seriously. i think the last one was when we bumped into each other at the beach. yeahh. so yesterday went out and reached home at 1 am. fooh. it`s been long since i reach home that late! the last time i reached home late was like 3 in the morning on 1st january 2006. yeahh! jia wei saw me but he didn`t call for me. grr. so went to mendle with the drums, electric one, at yamaha at ps lollies. anyhow only. weee. was fun larh. so yeahh. meet the parents went bad. i teared and at the same time, i was being rude. sorry larh. okay okay. i don`t like my teacher anymore. lol. so childish. but serious ehkk. untrue stories. whatever. i`m bored. bored. bored. bored. i fucking love paul. lol.

the beauty exposed ;



Okay. Nth much to post anywae. I was awake from my slp. My dae was like a pig. Grr. Haa. i slpt. And slpt. And in there i saw the two hims. Hmm. MAYBe i miss dem hella much. Tts y. Maybe it`s my imagination larh. Till it brings into my dweam. Hmm. Tsk. Tsk. Oklaa. Eh wa yao dedicate 1 song to my abg wawal. Lagu TABAH. Okay im done with blogging. I asked dearest sayang if he maen it wen he sae he loves n miss me not. Well. He said yeah. From deep of his heart. Hmm. Ok. But still im in doubts. Lalalalalala. Hurhur.Phuck. Faddie. Help me transform back okay from last tym syasya. I want. Pls. I dun wan to lose him. And eu noe hu rite. I nid to change. Pls.. Miss him too sei.. Alaa. Lagu oh babe on air at warna. Tts the song he sang and dedicate to me. Hmm. Wonder how he is now. Okay dearest sayang kol me todae.Wee. Suprised!!! Yeye. K.end here. Bye.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Holla. Been using the comp from morning. And wei. I skipped my litereture class again. Alaa. Im soori. Dada overeslpt! Sheesh. Soli cher. But i intend to go before that. And i realised tt i dreamt of my sayang dearest again.I tink i miss him soo much. Till it hunts me to my dream.. Alaa.. Its been sooo sooo many daes. I kept dreaming about him. I want his shadows to leave me can? Pretend that i dun and never came acroos tis thg kol loge. I wan to be egoistic cause i cant continue like this. Fad asked me to hold on.. Till wen. I loike him but cant ctnue lyk is. He`s beeter off with his frens. Does not make any diff if im there or not. Oh yeah. Ali. Just called me. Yeah! We patched things up. Thx to faddie. Im scared lor. I tot im gonna lose him. Dunwan uh tt to happen. Yeah. AAll smiles now. Okay. Now blogging seems to be boring. Dunnoe what to sae. Except venting my anger. Tell blog how i feel. Rant how much i miss dem. But still i cant get wat i want. Neither can i have things like how i wan it to be. Hmm. The oni thg is i wan to clear my mind. I dun wan anythgs to entangle around me. Shitheads. Okay nth to blog liao. And so. Ive met new frens todae. 3 of dem. ((= And soo the missingNESS towards sayang dearest continues.. Lalala. Sapai bilakah? Harus aku menanti.... Haa. And confession of my heart. I miss my abg sayang too. Shoot me.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, May 30, 2006


Holla. Okay. Im done from my career guidance thingy. LOL. Nid to dres up like office thingy. Hmm. So. I wore skirt and white top. Hee. Anw. Suprisingly. Sayang dearest wanted to meet me early in the morning. Actually dada got literature class. But ended up dada tak go cause super late. Terlajak uh sei. And last minute. Dada mit with sayang dearest. Anw. Dada daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa lame seh tak tok to him. What to do. KIte laa matair yang style. Matair tapi BISU. Kwang3. Style masok longkang. But dada admit larh i miss him. But. Okay enuf. So tadi wen to mit him. I was super late. So i took a cab. Hell. Waste my money.((= And yes uh! I saw him. But tot i taknk see him kan. Hmm.Hey. Guei miss dier sik. Mengapa menyinta andainya tak bebual. Usahlah berbicara tentang cinta dan sayang. Jika kasihmu hanyalah sementara. Hmm.. Jiwa kan si ek ni. Haa. I saw him lots of tym todae. But we dun realli tok ler. Tsk. But anw, Yeye. After the seminar. Dada went to play pool. Pple all tot kite ni dak poly uh sei! Bussiness skewl. AHEM! Ade bakat uh kiter. Ewah! I haf to admit tt ibni looks smart in tt suit. Fee weet. Puji je not more k.. And den. Guess wat. Aidil saw one of his frens. He looks like he`s into emo thingy. Cute laa. I spot his other fren. Smiling. Den, aidil told me that his friend wanted to kenal-kenal with me. WTH?! Haha. From dere he asked me if im with dearest sayang, abg wawal or with hu.. I just deny lor. But the actual fact is tt dada da berpunye okay? FULL STOP. Buut tt guy cute laa.. ((= With faddie, ali, ibni and aidil. Funnnnnnnnn. Dada laugh a lot lor. Even sayang dearest pn ade. ((= So i get to see him too. Saw jinjing and co too. But one by one go away. . First faddie den aidil. Den ibni. Left me and ali. But aleh2. Ali left me tooo. Tsk. Den. wen kiter klua pool. Dada got noticed tis group of mats and minahs. The mats smiled at me. Wee. Is it me? But yea i tink uh. The feeling u cannoe wat if pple smlie at eu or other pple. . . BUt dada tak smile back. But they pon cute. But too bad. Den biler kite pat ground floor. The guys swit2 at our group laa.. Oops. Mintak2 dimple tak tau sei. Cause he was there at that tym. Will he tell dearest sayang...? But dada and co never do anithg. So takya ttakot. Weee.((= Okay. Back to Ali. Dunnoe ehk wats rong with him. But wat dada noes tt. Ive been keeping this relationship sooooooo low profile. No one noes we are together. Suspect yea. But dada never admit. But tadi. Sayang dearest hold my hand. Infront of ibni and ali. Oops.. Takkan nak lepaskan sehh..So they alrd noe. Hmm. Its okay. Dada tak mind. But i dun wan it to kecoh-kecoh uh. Cause i noe pple will TALK once they noe tt if im not together with him nimore. Just like how pple tok about me wen i and abg wawal broke off. Sad kan. Well tts true lor..pple`s mouth. Cant shut up watt. . I just dunno y tis tym round ive got no confidence in tis relationship. SIGH. But wei. Dada sayang dier. Btol Dada sayang dier. Tak tau bape byk. But sayang tu ader laaaaa.. Okay laa watever. Never hear frm abg wawal. He ader soccer todae in dunman. But i finish at 1. Too bad lor. Haa. I tink ali is angry at me. Sori. Cause maybe he found out that i lied to him about my status. Okay. Okay. Im with him. Fer me to noe and fer u to find out. So i wan it to be on low key laa.. Sori if i dun tell eu about me.. Tsk. Tsk. And so. Guys. Dun ignore me uh just because i got a guy. Plss. LAaaa. Mepek ye. Klaa. Im done blogging. Boring. Toodles.Faddie take care..
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



To that special someone….
I’m waiting here for that someone everyday and night.
Needing someone to hold me tight.
To cheer me up when im sad.
And make me smile when im mad.
I need that someone that will always care..
Someone that will always be there..
Even when im right or wrong.
And always there to keep me strong..
Someone to show me there is no fear..
Someone always there and always near
Always helping me to get me through
Someone there to say I LOVE YOU.
Someone to be there when im cold..
And always there for me to hold..
Someone there for me to think of
Someone there to show me LOVE..
Could EU be that someone.?
I`m missing dearest sayang. . .
Im missing my abg wawal.
Im missing faddie-
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Eyes still half-opened. Baa. So anw. Dada gg to the career guidance later. N so. Im soo late fer the literarute class. What the heck?! Tt`s alwaes me. Boo hoo.. I hope i wun come across him todae. Pls. Pls/ But dada miss him larh. Screwed.my.LIFE. Bluek! Okay. After tt, i`ll be home cause i`ve got no plans. Eww. Bored ye!! Klarh. Gtg liao. Toodles.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, May 29, 2006


Hoho. I m dead tired. Mentally. Im exhausted. Im feeling fucked up. Grr. Bloody ass. No mood to chat wen i was online. And soo. I was still online. BUt appear online. I just find myself being more dumber each dae. Grr. This thingy has overcome my conscience. Well. Todae supposedly suppose to play pool huh. But due to some reasons. It was being cancelled. Dun ask larh wat reasons. -__-" Shitheads. I tot of going to the darn bloody beach. But decided not. I tot of taking the long train rides. But decided not. Oh well. Im crapping tis tym round. Dun ask y.-__-" Fucker. MOFO. Sya! Stop it larh. Grr. And so. Faddie told me tt she misses the old syasya. No the old syahidah to be precise. I miss her too. Anw. My pillar that moulded me to be tt syahidah is gone. Has long since it walked out into my life. Slipped away. And so. Abg wawal did emphasized on seeing the old syahidah. BUt i seriously dun noe how it ended out like tis. Yea. Lately. I`ve been noticing the changes in me. But perhaps maybe it was better. But hella no. The wae i speak. Maki all can be heard. Deng! Byk larh to be listed. Okay im bad. But i wan the innocent me. Bah haa!!((= So i did tok to my abg wawal just now. He unfold my sense like nobody business. Well. I feel hurt. But it`s fer my own good. Thx dearest abg. He misses me too. And gawd. I miss hella like soo much too. Now. I cant zipped up my mouth. Well miss him lor. I mean the last tym him. Wae to zaman purba. LOL. Yea. Wen i was with him. Now kite da change ckit though still rapat. ((= Thk GOD, dada n abg wawal still close. AMin- But still miss those time still. Hu doesnt? Hella it`s been long kan kite kenal each other.Duh. But sometimes, he pisssed me off larh. Grr.. His attitude. So he told me if i mend my waes, i can get him back. Haa. Holla abg? Get eu back? Like eu mean kite, both of us together? I wish i can. Haa. In our heart rite.. Dada am with sayang dearest. He`s my. But hey abg. U ARE MINE. Get the diff? WEll, i don`t. Wee. Dumb. So. Anw. Get well soon larh. Fer the next few daes, i dun wan to hav any contact with eu laa. No reasons fer this. Just feel like it. Im sorry. I will drift myself away. . . Shall see larh. So i did saw my sayang dearest just now. Wee. He said he misses me. Grr.Like real? WTF. Ntah laa. I dun believe him not. Miss him too lor. But see. Dada already adapt myself larh. Still am. Trying. I wonder how relationships work if there is not contact between them ehk? Any comments? He message faddie just now through zin`s handphone. Saying he misses me. And. And. He loves me. He loves me. Well. I love him too. Much. Lots. But i cant cntinue feeling tis we. Oh shit! What am i saying. Will i lose out if i lose eu? Will i like cry? Will i miss eu? Grr! darling dear, i cant. Cant go on like tis. Here listen to this song kae.
Spin (Mahzan B / Baldu)Puas Aku Mencuba
( 1 )Puas sudah ku mencuba
Menyakinkan dirimu kasih
Dan ku cuba meleraikan
Kekusutan tersimpul
Namun apa daya...
( 2 )Puas sudah ku mencuba
Turuti rentak dirimu sayang
Agar tiada tercetus sengketa
Di antara kita untuk selamanya
Engkau sering menduga hati ini
Menggugat kesabaranku
Namun tak pernah aku tunjukkan
Keresahan diwajahku...
Sampai disini saja sayang
Mampu ku pertahankannya
Kerna aku jua insan
Yang perlukan perhatian
Jangan kau sesali lagi
Atau menyalahkan takdir
Lihat pada diri
Di manakah kesilapanmu kasih
Menilai ketulusan (kejujuran)
Okay. Im feeling soo jiwang now.But i cant help it. But i love eu still kay. ((= Miss u laa sei. Like do eu noe tt? And so dada taknk bertepuk sebelah tangan. Ok my mly suck. So i just heck care lor. But hey i STILL care fer eu, my sayang dearest
So im gg to siap to meet my faddie. Larh. Wat to wear tml sei.. Shitheads laa.. Faddie. Im sori okay. I just dunnoe what i am feeling tis point. Tis moment. Fuck myself larh. Sori fer the profinities. I feel weird. Super weird. Okay. Just now was malay O level. Okay i would rate it. I hope i can get my As. At least A2 pls? I`ll be more than please. If better i want an A1.. Pls.Pls. Cross my finger. Ehk. No! Doa kpd ALLAH tt dada can get A1. Amin-((= Crap shits. And so. Dada admitted that dada da long tak pray. Hmm. Bad me.. Oni doa wen i`m in shits. Bad me. Okay. I tink i hate guys. But hey. Tis has nothing got to do with sayang dearest nor abg wawal not my guyfriend. Nothing at all. But in general. Im starting to not find dem attractive ni more. I mean some yeah. But their behaviours are all suckERS. Opps im sori. Not all of them. Maybe some. Maybe neither. But it`s soo ironic lor. Okay dada toking nonsen. Lalala. Dearest kind soul. Can eu help me pass tis message to my sayang dearest tt i miss him. Hella too much? Can? Miss him larh shitheads. Deng. And tell mine abg wawal tt i want the old him. The oldies. Haa. No. HIm. So anw. Etec told me that he was in the same bus as him just now. Alaaa. Wasted sei! Grr. But takpelaa. I get to see him just now in skewl. Wee.. Oh yeah. Toking about etec. Abg wawal and me fought yesterdae because he call me gatal in jk wae. Fuck larh. CB. Sardine jek panggil aku gatal. Ehk hallo? Bukan saye yang mintak number kan. Lagipun. Kite cume kawan-kawan. Nothing more. Anda ade paham. Yeah. Memang dier kewt. Tapi. Dada ade otak. I noe dada taklei dapat dier ape. So no use gg gaga over him. Like duh? Kite cume kawan biase. Ape jek.... Deng! Im feeling terok uh sei. Blog pn tak guna. Okay larh. Im done. Shut up. Okay bye.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



hey ho! faddie`s back. i practically screwed up my malay paper. i mean it. seriously. i freaking fell asleep. and believe it or not, i did 3 compositions altogether. whatthefuckright. first one i did, i fell asleep. when i woke up i forgot the fcuking story. okay fine. second compo, the intro was exactly the same and again, i fcuking fell asleep. once i woke up, i forgot what to right about. so next, the third one. was one teacher said "5 more minutes" i was like whatthefuckmann. so i scribbled totally and i managed to write only a page. yes! a page only. so paper two was also the same. fell asleep. damn it. shithead. sleepyhead. argh! so i didn`t manage to think clearly. i feel like crying. argh. and then there`s this word 'purba'. i don`t know the meaning and i never heard of it before. so with the brains that God gave me, i structured this sentence; Salleh menerima purba daripada ayahnya kerana telah lulus dalam peperiksaannya. yes i know i`m bad in my malay. but can`t i fcuking improve? i really wanna get distinction. who the hell doesn`t? so now, i have to depend entirely on my oral[which sucks totally] and listening[okay¬larh] hais. i`ve again disappointed my parents. i`m so sorry okay. argh. until when that i want to start studying? freak freak freak. syaa, i tried calling u but engage and ur phone was off. i`m scared! there`s meet the parents later. can i just be dead temporarily?

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, May 28, 2006


Holla. Dada`s back. Fuh. Boy am i tired. So i was out with saufi dearest and ali dearest. It was super havoc. Soo chiaotic. They are super LOUD. So i had real fun. Halo dada. Tml is like ur O LEVEL MT PAPER larh gerl. Hee. Guess im not yet down to earth. Enjoying still. So. My ayah gave me $50. To buy my shoe. I tot i can get tt $29 shoe. But ended up with a $45 highcut shoe. Dada shall buy a normal shoe next. Yes uh! ((= All smiling... Maybe i shall post the picture later. Maybe not. The cable lost man...!! Wat a waste. So anw. Sgapore Idol is on tevee!!! Wee. Must catch it lor.. Toodles. Gtg now. Nitez. Gd luckk...((= And soo. Dada miss dearest bebeh sayang. Tsk. Tsk. WTF! Whatever larh. Hope he`s doing fine.. N to my missingNESS goes to dearest abg wawal n dearest pig. LOL. Hella. Im lame. Ok bye.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



hello hello. i`m back. yeahh from both wedding. boy, am i bloated. now i`m still eating. chocolates. weeee. yummy. i so wanna get that shoe. argh! okay stop it. so went to ms fadilah wedding and now i shall address her as mdm fadilah. hmmm. she look pretty as ever! seriously. like woah. bling bling. i`m feeling lethargic. hey! it`s singapore idol on tv. i guess i won`t have time to study for my malay. wish me luck u guys. good luck to u people too`! imagine wearing ur traditional clothes and then u play eight ball. haha! funny, don`t u think? but that`s what me, dada dearest and andre did. wakakaka. but dre wore casual lah. so he not paisei. but was fun larh thou not as fun as always. i played bad today. uncomfortable feeling i guess. kaylarh i wanna watch teeveee. weeeeeeee.

the beauty exposed ;



Im back from Ms Fadillah`s wedding. Or im supposed, MDM fADILLAH`S wedding. So she`s a newly-wed bride. Congrats to her. Oh gosh! She look awesome. She`s sooo gorgeous. How beautiful. I wish i would reach that stage one dae. Perhaps. ((= Haa. The feeling of getting married. Aww. Hiw does it feel ehk. Nah. Think about it some other tym. Wait fer that perfect or at least near to perfect guy to samba into my life. Wee. That will be great.. Fairy tales life. Awww.. IF oni. Back to reality. Anw. Saw lots of DUNMANITES there. Saw the teachers. Haa.. Well. I did have fun though with faddie. Anw. Sori cause geui siap late. ((= Ampun. So after that. Dada went to play pool with faddie and andre. Haaa. Den got this guys look-look. Kan faddie? Eww. Not cute at all. Oklay. But old. Haa. Maybe about 20 plus? We are not interested. ((= Pool was okay laa.. No comment on that. So. Hey. iI wan a charger..!! Darn it. Must wait till maybe tml. Ali gonna sell his extra charger to me. Fer $5. Hee. Totful of him. Thx fren!! Speaking of fren. I miss toking to dearest pig. Lol. Haa. But i can manage laa.. I miss him ehk. And dada miss dearest sayang. N last but not least. Dada miss that abg wawal of mine laaa. Hilang ntah ke mane sik kamu. WTH! Big W...Whatever. So tml. Is my mly. Gd kluck to pple. Klaa. Im off to buy my converse shoe todae. Yeye ayah gave me $50 bucks to get me a shoe. Yippe...((=
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Holla. Dada woke up suprisingLY early todae. ANd hey i did dreamt about sayang dearest todae. But it was disturbed. And i woke up and ayah talk to me. He gave me some money. And so. Tt`s it. I saw my sayang dearest in my dreams. ((= The setting was in my old skewl. Weird. It`s after assembly. EVen faddie`s dad was there. On the tears. HAa. Wearing white colour specs and sitting together with his ex-girlfriend. Hee. AUnt Ruzi wasnt there laa. We talked. But i remembered wearing my swimming costume laa. and orange pants.. What shit sei. Hee.. But bottomline is that i get to see him in my LALA land. ((= See. Dada is just being dumb. Okay. Anywae. It`s MS DYLA`S wedding todae..!!! Yeah. We shall call her MDM FADILLAH. ((= Eww. But with respect to her new marital status, we will. *claps * fer her. Congrats cher. So. Im still wondering on what to wear. Hot sei wearing the traditional clothes. Lalala. Hmm. Oh yeah. This is fer abg wawal. Hope some dae he will come across this entry. But come to think again, hope he will not laa. Maybe will hurt him even more even he sees the entry about sayang dearest. . . Deng! Anw. Zazmf yzyzk, czcz lhrr zvzj. vgx zag szj ldrrzfd czcz? Zbshnm rdh!!! Klaa. I nid to do my house chores. I wan to poot! Haa. ((= Miss him. Hu? Haaa.. Both. Deng. Faddie, if eu wanna come to my house, u may. Okay? No one at home except my adek.. ((=
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, May 27, 2006


...its useless shedding tears for things you don't understand. Things that you are angry with... Things that don't usually goes with what you want it to be. Yet it brings tears to what makes you appreciate life more. Even more.. Tears that may brings smile to other people. Hmm. I miss him... I miss sayang dearest- Fer now, I will dream about the love letters and surprise phone calls. I'll never receive the fairytale dates. The assurance. Sigh.. I WILL NOT hope....but i will only dream ))= That is why i love to slp. ((= I hope i can see him in there. Im just being dumb. Feeling dumb as ever. In this werld, its not about loving the perfect somebody. But to me, it`s to love an imperfect person perfectly... This is one of my MOTTO in life.--> Never cry over somebody who would not cry over you. Sya. Dun be a jackass! (ANd a smiling face doesn't always mean a smiling heart right. I miss those tym. With him. I dun wan to be entangled with this shits nimore. I want to born like a baby again. Pls. Pls.) Life is beautiful but complicatING, not perfect but beautiful otherwise life would be boring... Grr! Agree? I'm happy to be here i'm happy to have him... [[When you are together with that someone you pretend to ignore him. But when that someone is not around you you might look around to find him. At that moment, you are in love.]] Tt`s wat im goin through now. Maybe. But ever since then. I love him more. Even more. Y arent we communicating or seeing each other often as the others..? But it went downhill. No im suppose it does not. I just need to be patient. It will pay off. Maybe.. Life`s like a rollercoaster. Don`t eu agree..? Sometimes....i just need that assurance or i'll go confused. Berserk. Haa. Not to that extend larh. I nid that hug. Scorpio(s) are delicate fuckers. An emotional basketcase. A paranoid creatures. Oops. Maybe that`s oni fer me. Sori for those profinities.... ))= The perfect human being is the one who knows the purpose of life- I wish i could be that. But deng! No one's perfect.. I miss sayang dearest. I miss him.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Boo hoo. Todae supposes to go out with faddie. Wanted to buy fer Ms dilla wedding gift. But soon i found out that she`s going with shaz. Decided to stay at home. Sori ehk ali. I lazy uh wanna go library. An sori to amy. IM too lazy to go out. So i meet eu some other dae larh oritez. Anw. It rained soo heavily. Tt made me more lazzier. ((= Tt`s me. Haa.. So dada slpt. Fun. I guess i dreamt about sayang dearest. Argh! Whatever laa..

"I cant slp w/o you. I cant breathe animore. Good tym lasts forever.. Swear eu never leave me. I`ll be dere everytym in ur heart."

So. Tts the song im listening to right now. Hey. Babi larh ini feeling. Okay whatever. Im done. I nid to study larh. And i am soo missing him. Missing in action.((= Anw. I so hate my handphone charger.. Spoiled already ehk. And now. I cant message!! Grr. My batt`s flat. And ive got no way to charge it. Im sori to those who message me. I cant reply to u guys. But i will. The minute my hp is alrite okay..

So anw. Im onlining rite now. Chatting with etec. Haa. Fun laarh. dier. Alaa. But i noe skejap jek kan faddie. Pple come and go. Hmm. But hey. At least dada get to noe him. He`s fun. Too bad laa. Anw dier de tanye about sayang dearest. ((= I dunnoe if sayang dearest bagi tak if i tell about us. But anw. I wwant it to be low profile. So. Saye kate kite kawan rapat skali. ((= Tapi. Dada sayang sayang kiter byk-byk. Kite rindu dier lahh.. Bt takpe laa.. KIte taknk rindu dier byk-byk. Mane tau dier tgh happi-hapi. But dada`s here wasting tym. Hu noes.

Lalala. Got nth to blog already. My brain`s jammed. I want to slp again. Cause i want to meet sayang dearest in lala land. Not in reality but in lala land pn jadik laa. Haa. Deng!

So im wondering if abg wawal da recover tak. Wish him well laa. Maybe he`s working now. But his back sprained kan. Ntah laa. Anw. DAda wondering asl abg wawal tak kol or message me ehk.Hmm. Usually, he will what. Grr. But he didn`t since the thursdae thingy. Sori lor. He saw me stressED out about sayang dearest thingy. At that point he said. "This is one of the positive reasons to show that someone dun loves eu ni more." Laa.. Whatever larh. Obviously i care about sayang dearest uh. WTH!

To my new fren, Dearest pig. Get well soon okay. ((= Nice chatting with eu. Dun be bored with ur life. Smile. You are cute. But im CUTER darling. Ahaa.. Lol.((=

Klaa. Im done. Toodles. Tata. Nights.

``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



i`m back. reached home at 5. yeahh pretty early. in fact, very early. just walked around and guess what? i saw a total of 10 friends! weeeeeee~ shiok! it`s like everywhere i go, i saw my friends. well, that`s the interesting part. hmmm. ohh. shaz and saha asked me to tag along with them watch x men 3. cool. but nahh. saha was like practically begging and that he wanted to treat me but i said no repeatedly. his face turned red. lol. and i saw so the paisei lorr. imagine loads of people looking and staring at u. so yeahh. saufi called me asking where`s the gig. so i assume his lost! wakaka. so i`m home now. there`s no one at home. i feel so sleepy. . . zZzZzZzZzZzZz

the beauty exposed ;



Hmph! CB laa.. Write so long already. Den the post went missing.!! Kaboom. Just ike tt. No single trace. I write again ltr laa..

the beauty exposed ;



good morning`! i slept at 12.30 last night and while i was sleeping, i received a call at 3 in the morning. i didn`t even know that i answered the call and perhaps, i talked shit a lot. because i don`t recall talking any sense. seriously. the next thing i know was that i called that person back. boy, am i dumb or what? and we continued talking for an hour? i think so. yeahh. seriously, i can`t remember anything about the conversation except for the ghost part. so today`s a saturday. where to head? hmmm. syasya, do u wanna go out and find her prezzie? i`ll be out at 11.30 with my mum so, tag along okay? i`m not eaten my breakfast yet so i`m feeling hungry. now i`m all wondering how bolala knows alomst everything about me and my life? hmmm. well, not exactly larh. but it seems like it. i mean, argh! syasya knows what i mean. and now he acts differently towards me. of cos i feel there`s something wrong laaa. i mean we don`t communicate anymore like how we used to with all those happy times where we laughed and joke our asses out. seriously. and now it`s turned upside down. freak. but well, Godknowswhat`shappeningmorehthanwedo. tmr`s sunday. weeee. there`ll be 2 wedding invitations. so soon, we have to address ms fadilah. . .MDM fadilah. sounds funny. but whatever. yeahh. weeee. kaylarh. it`s 11 and i wanna shower and then out i go. *_hugs&kisses_*

the beauty exposed ;



Let me start off. Well, firstly. Special thks to dearest poovan. Anw. YOu gave my number to him rite? Hakz. Yea. Haf to admit tt he`s cute. And soo. Yeah. He`s cute. Certified cute. But too badd laa. Dada. Stop going gaga over him. Well. Only a mere praise to him laa.. Nth more. Dada still find sayang dearest my heartrob. ((= Grr. I soo super duper miss my sayang dearest. . Deng..! Okay. Dada has to stop all thiss missingNESS. It`s not going to bring any benefits anywae. But. If u were to come across this blog. Trust me. I soo miss eu larh. Miss eu dear. Tsk. Tsk. I wan it to be over real soon. It`s oni a dae. . . But felt like it`s been ages lor. I nid a hug. Teddy hug from anione pls..? Toot. I hella miss him badly... I wonder what is he doing.. I hope he`s been studying real hard. And i hope he wun smoke much. Tkcr good care of urself tau.. Dun let this problem affect eu mentally.. U must be strong baby. I will be dere if u ever nid me.. Lerr..Im just close to tears. Cause bloody hell i miss him. . . Shitheads. If oni. Okay whatever. I cant get anythg from all those IFs.. Miss eu darlz. . . . So continuing from caile. Well. He did messaged me. *Eyes rolling* Wee. Hey. He`s fun. Nice to tok to. And he`s got a habit of saying 'lol'.. ((= So i did haf fun toking to dearest new fren. He`s got a new name. Caile=Mr Scrooge. Gee. Okay. Okay. Im kidding. Overall. Thumbs up to me.. Fun converstion indeed. ((= Anw. I went to so called skewl. WEnt to tampines mart eventually. Met with dearest saufi, ali and haikal.. Ok. Waited sooo sooo long fer dear Ali.. But we perservere. ((= Oops. Dada tot the guys don`t noe F language. Indeed they knew. And shitheads. Maybe they understood everything that came out from me and faddie`s mouth. Ooops. Shit. Were toking about them uh seh!!! *guilt* So afte tt. Went to BK. Fer our lunch cum dinner. Saw haskik, iskandar and theiR fwen. Halo kwn-kwn. But to my suprised, Dada met with abg wawal. He came to me while i was ordering. Cian die. He sprained his back. ANd congrats to ur winnings in 4x100m and 4x400m race. He`s got 1st and 2nd in position respectively.. Dada am so proud for his achievement. ((= Well done dear abg wawal kiter. Anw, Jage dier and tkcr tau. Get well soon.. Tt`s about all to blog todae. Nothing much except fer the repititiion that DADA MISS SAYANG DEAREST LAA WAE TOO MUCH SAYANG. Too much. Deng! Nitez. .
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, May 26, 2006


GOOD LUCK FOR UR O LEVEL MOTHER TONGUE PEOPLE__!!!

the beauty exposed ;



Good luck to my dearest abg wwawal in your 4X100m race todae. I want u to get the 1st position. *winks* Al the best. Eu can do it. Chiayou..!! Chiayou! Anw must tkcr too okay. Toodles.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Wei. Just came back from skewl. . . Todae will be the last dae of skewl. So. It`s the end of semester 2. Wow.. Tt`s fast. . And i have to buck up in my academics. Fuhh. I flunk my exams. Shit. So. Anw. I met sayang dearest outside skewl tadi. He requested. And much appreciated. I soo miss him. Miss him. If oni he READ this entry. I soooo MISS my sayang dearest..!!!!!! Grr. And i want him to be stressED-free. Haa. Miss him. Miss him. So just now, he did told me that he misses me too. Haa. Aidil was beside us. He whispered those stuffs. Haa. Lucky aidil didn`t hear it. Gosh. Thx fer those thingy k sayang? ((= Laa. I feel like.. Err.. Nothing laaa. Shall close my eyes and imagine it. Cheer up k sayang dearest... Takmu stress2. And pls. Pls. Do well in you MT O level exams.. I wish u were here. Pls. Help me dada miss him much. I dunnoe what`s wrong with me lah.... Miss him. Miss him. Miss him. Miss him. Misss him. Super-super miss him... So i wonder if we will drift apart after this.. Alaa. Hope not... Okay. Dada. Look at the bright side of lyf. Zin tot me not to tink of the negatives. Fad too.. Thx yeah... Laa.. Dada got nothing to blog. Except. Dada miss him. Dada miss sayang dearest. Badly. Fucking miss him sei. ))= Da laaa.. Enuf. Tata.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Guess what. Dada just came back. Precisely. It is super late. And when i was out, i was moody most of the tym. Hey. I dun wan tis to affect me. I am afraid. I am afraid. I nid my sayang dearest to console me. Now. Whisper everything so that i can cool down. I soo miss him. It`s been long. But todae i just cant take it. I wanna spill everythg. Cause from the bottom of my heart. Dada miss sayang dearest. BUt todae. He seems diff. After skewl. He kinda has to rush fer sth. And tt realli affect him. He messaged me. And it`s all weird to me. And i AM scared of the possibilities. And i dun want the negative stiffs to be in my mind. Go. Go away. Let me share with eu aites the messages...
Syg...Juz wana wish u a happy 3 month anniversary. U tkcr kae... Maybe u wont see me smile after rodae.. Bt i wan u noe dat i luv u alwaes and will miss u.. Take good care of urself kae... Miss u veri3 much...Muaaah...

Syg, jusz remember my words...I LUV U ALWAES...U take good care of urself kae..Miss u veri3 much.. I will alwaes b inside ur heart n dat goes e same 4 me..Mwah.. Syg, 4 nw i wan u to promise me dat u tkcr of urself kae... Cuz mayb i wont c u much after todae...Bt watever happen, i wan u to noe dat i luvu ceri3 much kae syg..Promise me aitez.. 4 e sake of me... Syg, im gonna miss u... Luv u sayang... Anithing happens, juz remember dat i will luv u alwaes watevet e outcome is... Smile kae sayang... Muaaah... Syg, b4 u gg to slp, i want to give u 3 kisses..Mwah, 4 being dere 4 me.. Mwah, 4 luving me. Mwah..For our 3 months anniversary...

So tt`s it. What i am curious is y must he alwaes emphasize. Whatever happens.. U must take good care of myself and stuffs. Is he going away? Away from me. Alaaa.. Y..?? Freak. I miss him laaa.. God oni noes that it is true. SIgh. Y. Must there alwaes be overcome..

Ad thx zin. Seriously. Help me laaa... I feel soo helplesss. I feel useless. I am his gerl. But i cant help him. And the major thing is that he does not feel comfortable enuf to share his probz with me. I just dun wan him to burden himself. But he just want s me to be happi. But i dun want tt. It`s sooo unfair. I want him be be stressED-FREE. So i will try my best to put everything in place. Even if it involves silence. Ewww.. So hate silence. But . Haf to kan? I just hope tt nth will happen.. I dun wan to make a fool out of myself... Grr..

Klaa.. I soo miss sayang dearest. Sayang smile kae bebeh. Love eu.. Miss eu larh. If oni u noe.. But will eu love me and miss me like how eu alwaes expressed it to me. I hope u will. Cause. Im in love with eu.. And i soo want u. I want a comeback fer eu. No stress. NO proz. Just sayang dearest. The hapi go lucky baby with a sweet smile on his face.

nItez, gtg. Its late. Help me. I want him to smile back. Pls....

``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, May 25, 2006


Hollla. So. Dada just received a message from abg wawal. Wee- So off I go to meet him. Lalaa.. Hey. Dada just received a message from dearest sayang saying i wun be seeing him smile animore.. Allaaa. Asal nie ngan die plak? Hmm.. Smile k sayang. Love eu too. Cheer up baby.. K laa. Gtg liao. Tata.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Hoho. My dae went quite alright. I came to skewl at 10 in the morning. I was off the hook as i was HAVING MY MADRASAH exams. And that`s the reason why i was late. Haloo.. I`ve got an excuse letter from the skwel okay. Wee~ So about 9, sayang dearest messaged me. He was asking y why i didn`t go to skewl after all. Hmm.. Awak msg kite? Gd uh. At least u noe jow i felt when u NEVER come to skewl huh? At least i give eu peace. I didn`t message eu and stuffs. But for u. It`s da BISAE laa.. Deng~ Sayang dearest was telling me that he cant wait to see me and stuffss. Haa. Miss eu too larh. But complain complain like as if i can see eu. No rite. So. Wen we enter the class. The class was hella noisy. Ruffians. Haa. And soo i sat rite at the back. But behind was sayang dearest and co laa.. Gee. I sat down. And to my suprised, Seri Hidayani wished me 'Hapi Anniversary'. Woah- Thx ehk awak.((= See . I dun realli noe her but she made the first move to wish me. How sweet. Thx.. Anw. U have got a nice name. And hey. Hey. I did once told my bestie how sweet u and ur boi. Awww... Haa. Pardon me cause i am soo mesmerized to see eu both together. Sweet. But i AM much sweeteer larh.. Hee.. Jk. The lesson was short fer me and faddie. Cause we came at a later note. But dada get to see sayang dearest. I hella miss him. Long kan kiter tak kluar together. It`s okay laa. Dada have to learn.. Wee.. But hey. Everything went all fine. Until. After skewl. Im sorri if i tok about eu okay. But hey pls laaa. Remember u ever want to take someone i love dearly last tym..? And now. Pls. Pls. Dun ever take my sayang dearest away from me pls....? Once is enuf. Obviously u wun like it wen i ask eu to chop-chop wen eu are toking to YOUR boyfriend huh? Dun act like one big fuck can? So what. Trying to tell me that u haf the control over my boyfreind. Fuck off uh. Ch uh. I soo hate eu. Sometime, u are sweet. Nice to me and stuff. But at tyms. U changed. Dun be one hypocrite can? Fuck. Fuck. Ur staring may mean 101 reasons huh. Stop staring. Get on to ur lyf. . R u in awe looking and staring at me? Aww. Im touched. Grr....Fucker! Alright. Im sorri fer all the profinities i`ve used k faddie? Grr. So anw. It`s 25 of the month. There comes the 3rd month of us.. ((= But todae is just like any other dae. It`s just not the same compared to the tym weh i am with abg wawal last tym. We treat each other as priority. And the date means soo much to us. We had even celebrate in every month. And spending quality tym with each other. But fer me and sayang dearest. . . It is complety the opposite. Even if he`s got the tym, 25% will goes to me. But his friends will come first. Tsk. Okay. Whatever. . . So. Ayah just gave me $50 bucks. Yippee.. Im out to but my slipper. Wee.. ((= Ayah will give me money to buy shoe on Sundae. C laa. iF i wan it not.. ((= Tt brighten up my dae. Anw. Last 2 daes or so.. Abg wawal ajak dada to go out. But he didn`t message or kol me either. I wonder what`s up with him. SO. If that`s the case. I`ll be all silent. I wun find him unless he find me. Grr. Alwaes breaking the words he said. How wanton his words can be huh? Lalala. Got this feeling that i wun be going out with him todae.... Takpe laa. If not. I shall go to slp. Klaa.. Tataa. Toodles. Byebye. Take care faddie. Oh. hapi 3 months sayang.. Tt`s it. Short. But not sweet at all. Hu cares? It just a date anw. But i not making a big fuck aout of it. Oops. Sorri. Anw. U didn`t do anything but yet all these profinities that linked to eu. Ampun. So i wun prioritised the date. And everything nimore. . . And hey. I`m the gerl who hold her words. Dun believe? Ask abg wawal. He noes me BEST. Or faddie. She noes me best too. But not eu. Ironically. U are my guy. But i AM not close to eu. U don`t even noe me. I guess. I am closer to other guy friends i have. Hmm. Nonsen but true. ((= Klaa. Taaaa.. Take care sayang. Love eu still laa.. Abg wawal. Where r u...? Grr. Whatever laa. Anythg must. Must take care hor. Syasya. Cheer up darlz. I will still prioritise eu. Nah. Dun wori k... Muacks! Love eu dada. Forever till eternity. I will be here fer eu. *winks*
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, May 24, 2006


Holla. Dada now at faddie`s house. Just finish swimming. Yeah! At last, dada get to swim sei. Yuhoo, Thx faddie. Anw. Tadi dada eat spaghetti. As usual, it is sooo nice. Superb. Sedap sei. I shall pst the swimming pix later okay? Oe dae if i got tym to upload yea. So faddie. At last. I received all the pictures. Yes!! Thx okay faddie. Klaa. Dada stopped here. B4 that, tadi malay intensif was funn.. Saufi sat beside me. And we yacked and yacked. It was ubber fun laa. Get to see sayang dearest too. And guess what, he`s been caught sevaeral tym fer talking. Becok.. Hahaha. Like mak nenek!!! Kwang3. He`s new nick shall be... MAKCIK. Gee. So today malay intensif... Cifu hafsah majok dok.. Si usop sontorian. At last, faddie now wats tt. Its a malaysia cartoon larh. . . Deng! Klaa.. Haf to cut short. So tml i skip mly intensif. Will come to skewl slightly late. Dada got MADRASAH EXAM.Deng! Fad! Good luck okay...?? Study lahh oi!!! Goodie luck. Anw. Hey it will be the 25 laa tml? ((+ YeahNESS too me.. But still same laa. We dont celebrate. Sad. But its okay. i have to learn. So wish sayang dearest hapi 3 months k sayang. Love eu darlz... So tml, dada mitting abg wawal. !!! Yeye!! But on 25 mit abg wawal ehk? Hmm. Takpelaaa.. We shall see tml.. Toodles laa.. Nitez..
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, May 23, 2006


Boo hoo.! Just came back from school. So. Fad`s in skewl now. I didnt accompany her to do her dnt. Im meeting my fwen later. Yeah. After soo long. How is she ehk now.. So anw. Todae sayang dearest didnt come to skewl Grr. I know i didnt msg him yesterdae. Bout.. "Yeah can c eu tml..." Ended up he cabot skewl. Go pond. Whatever thingy laa. Ape nak cabot-cabot? Haiz. Skola nk kat abez pn nk cabot. Treasure ur tym laa in dunman. . . So anw. Cikgu Hafsah bagi oreo. Haa. Dapat answer uestion tt`s y.. But salah. Haha. Amek jek. Da bagi taklei tarik balek. Hurhur.. Deng! So. klaa. Syasya wanna slp. zZz. 3:30 hOpe can wake up. And soo.. Dada miss the talks with dearest abg wawal kiter. WHaterver it is. I cant do wothout him around. I will try extra hard to change. Thx abg. . (:
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, May 22, 2006


Fucked larh. Dada soo stressED up. Help me. FirstLy. Its about my damn RESULTS. It`s superbly not well done. Though i knew it all along. But i dun wan to dissapoint my mum and dearest dad who have work real hard fer me. . . Shit laa. I`ve dissapoint them. Gee. I feel sooo bad. Dada feel soo stupid. Fel sooo dumb. Blady hell. Abg wawal was dissapointed in me too. He compared my ast tym results and now. So he told me i`ve changed tremendously. Gawd. I am truly sorri okay abg? I will try my very best. I promise. And anw. I did go out with him just noe. My intention was to de stressed. But ended up stressing mself up all again. Gee. So. WE played pool. . . He won me all the wae. I won only 1 game. How pathetic. SHEEsh. So abg wawal tried to cheer me up. Thx fer that yeah. Much appreciated. Anw. Abg, adek mintak maaf kay pasal tadi adek naik kan suara adek. I dun mean too. But u alwaez push me to the limit uh.. I dun like it. Pls. Adek mintak Ampun aye? Trime Kasih. ADek will try my very bestt to study real har. Not to maki. To be patience. Not be like last tym. Adek will try to jage my pakaian and stuffs and tingkah laku adek kay. But i try. Tak semestinye i do kay. Pls. I cant be like last tym. Tis is me now. . . . ))= Sorri i dissapoint u time and again. Ampun abgku beribu-ribu ampun. So the 2nd thg i stress about is about my bill. . . Heart beating fast. It $577 plus laa sei. And im scared. . . Its gonna due in few daes tym. And the lawyer letter has arrived. Im dead. Grr. How. StressseED- Abg wawal dun let dada work cause he wants me to conccentrate. Thx. But im desperate to work uh. Nid to settle my bill...... Grr. phuCK. . . Alaa. Da laa.. Dada stop here. Too tired to blog. Off to bed. B4 12:30. At least must try kan. A promise is a promised. . . Nitez dear blog. Nitez abg wawal. Nitez sayang dearest. Nitez faddie bestie. PS. Dada miss dearest sayang uh. . . . ))= PS:Dada miss dearest nurul. AND dearest family ang wawal. sooo sooo much.. Tsk.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Holla. Dada just reached home. Stepped into the house. Suddenly dearest father asked me if i see the can opener? WTF? Guei just came home. Dun expect me to bring it to skewl larh bodoh. Den. Want to start his nagg. Grr. Stupid nabei. Anw. I quickly went into the room. and get changed. I`m gonna mit my fwen. MAybe. Im too upset about my results. Fuck larh. Dun ask okay how many sub i failed. Go to hell cb. So. I hope i can cheer myself up. I feel soo dumb. WTH! So. Maybe dada has got no tym to blog today except fer tis short entry. So skewl was okay. AS usual. Get to see sayang dearest. But that`s it. No interesting comment. . Anw. Hell. Dada soo hapi... Guess wat!!!! Dada tok to ETEC just now. In the hall.. Fuhh. It was holla splendid bebeh. He`s sooo super CUTE. He talked to me. He see my grades on his own accord. KPO. But it`s okay laa..((= And he shake my hand lahh... Woohhooo!! All smiles. He soo hot sei. With his hella red cheeeks. Aww.. And he ajak go long john but im supposed to give him a treat. Noe y? Cause he passed but i flunk. Banyak cantik. Hurhur. Cute laa eu. Hansem pn. So he asked me if his fren. Tt guy cute anot? WEll.. Like duh. TheY are both sooo hot. Hunks. Super cute. Too bad. Stakat cute and not more laa... Overeall. He`s lame. Fun to mixed with laa.. ((= How i wish tt the dae wun end. Cause i meet a new fren. Ehk. Not new uh. But i tok with sb i dunnoe todae though we smiled at each other often. Thumbs up. ((=
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, May 21, 2006


``That`s me and abg wawal. <3s> like how i <3> ``Abg and adek till eternity...? Promise...? ``Advanced Celebration fer his 17th bdae. ((= See that dimple? I loike!!!

Holla to euu. So todae its Sundae. . . Nothing much to do ya. And i slept the whole dae. And Ali called me several tym but didnt pick up. Faddie called but i were too tired. Den. Sb called my home. It was my abg wawal. He called me laa. Im sorri i didnt called eu yesterdae. And i didnt replied to ur msges. Actually. It was because dada tak nk eu lectured me time and again sei. I noe its fer my own good. But dada taknak we fight fight. I hate it man. And dada just dun like wen silence feel the atmosphere. Eww. Nt so my type. So anywae. Todae conversation. Dada feels sooooooo sooooo soooooo touched by what abg wawal said. He had requested that he work fer 3 daes per week. Err. His reasons are he wants to spend that time with me so that he can motivate me to study. . . Wow. Dada superb touched. Thkx abg. But. Eu no nid to sacrifice fer me k awak.. Several things i had wanted to highlight. But i just forgot the all. Grr. What a waste laaa.. But i am truly sorri cause i`ve dissapoint abg wawal cause of my bad and horrendous results... Im sorri. I`ve just got no motivation to study. Like how i used to have one. And fer that. Abg wawal wants to be my motivator. So he don`t mind doing all these fer me. Even if it involved his work. Isn`t he soo caring and thoughtful. Thx awak. ((= But pls laa. Dada dun wan to involve eu k. Anw. Just now. Abg wawal asked me. He`s been wondering if i appreaciate whatever he did and thoose sacrifices. Like hallooo. OBviously laa sei. And he told me he misses me. He love me still. Still as deep. Wow. I feel realie3 honoured fer sb to love me that much. But eu. Understand me kay. I have my sayang dearest. I noe u r trying. However. Trust me. I hella love eu okay? Like how i love dem all. Remember those promises? To gerls out there. Who read this entry of mine. Let me tell eu that this abg wawal of dada`s is superly GREAT. He`s what a gerl wants in him. But at time. He`s too demanding. Too strict maybe? But it`s all fer the individual`s good. But hey. No. Hell no. Okay. Back off laa eu all. He`s my abg and alwaes be. Hmph! No laa. Go. Go and grab him. Eu wun regret gerls. I noe him best okay? Trust me. . . But. But. Lalala. So he did emphasized on 0804 next year. . Err. Will he? Or will he not? I shall see.. Anw. My abg wawal is sick... Dada doakan he will recover soon okay..? Pls. PLs. Let him baik. Amin- Get well soon abg. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . So he told me he msged with poovan darling that dae. Thru msg. Msged about me. Asked her about me. So maybe she knew what abg wawal feels now. Lalala. And guess what. Abg wawal told me that he`s fighting fer the custody of ME.!! Hmm. The reason is..? He love me still. He wants me back. But Im with sayang dearest. He knew that i wld side with sayang deraest but ignored whatever circumstances. So. Dada has got no comment on that. May the best man win okay. Haa. Hey no laa. I still love abg wawal. But hey. I love sayang dearest jugak ok? I love him. . . . But hey love. . . What`s love huh? From dictionary.com Dada found out that love is. . . . >To have a feeling of intense desire and attraction toward (a person). >To experience deep affection or intense desire for another. Da laa.. 4get bout tis true love okay? Dada dun belive it if it reali exist. Like. Love is Mr Backstabber. Mr Heartbreaker. Tear jerker.Rite. MAybe. Fer me laa.. Klaa. Dada stopped here. I totally forgot what o blog.. Soli. Soli. But i noe thers more than this. Hurhur. Toodles. Thx fer ur love k abg? Much appreciated. Yeah. I can understand how painful it is to see that sb u love to love someone else. Kan. But. Daa no comment laa.. ((= U will be loved. . . . . . Hearts eu abg.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, May 20, 2006


Holla Went to Sentosa todae. Fun. Okay laa.. ((= GEt to see sayang dearest uh. Yikes. So todae was tiring. Played dog and bone. But sadly. Anban`s wallet gone missing. Sad fer him. And acap`s potato chips were on the loose too. Potato chips? Like duhh. Haha. Cian sei. But i did feel hurt laa. Wen sayang dearest said that one thing. Grr.. ASS betol. But i just hush hush. Pretend nothing happened. So. Wen playing dog and bone. There`s these rough patch between zin and sayang dearest. Sayang. U r too hot tempered sei. And wen u are like tt. All eu do is smoke. SMOKE. smoke. And hell. Eu smoke a lottttttt huh? Grr. Whatever laa.. Ur lyf kan.. And soo. Sadly. We misssed the musical fountain. Alaaa.. Again. Again. And again. Hurhur. So we did tok. Misunderstandings have been clared now. Gawd. Thx. Alhamdulillah. ((= Miss him soo soo much. And anban fought with these taxi driver. CB laa him. FCuk him. Nabei! Idiot sak. U are in the wrong halooo? Anyone who has fee tym pls pls lodge a complain about this taxi driver with plate number. SHB 528T? Alaa. 4got uh. Must ask acap.. Klaa. Tata. And let me share with eu this. Sayang dearest gave me thru message. . . .
U...Seriously, i dun noe hw to describe my love to eu... Only actions will explain...Haa...If nt, i would be saying 'i luv u' till got no voice to say...I realli3 feel lyke hugging u so tightly nw... Cuz i miss u soo much even though aru jek jumpe..

So anw. He said that. But kite jarang contact sei.. Da laa. Lalalala. Love eu tooo. But it`s complicated k.. Kan.Kan.

KlAA. gtG. Tata. Dada miss him laa. Grr. miss sayang dearest soo sooo muchh. ((=

``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



i declare this saturday the boring-est saturday ever. seriously. well, the other day when there`s was no school, i was suppose to go out with syasya but can`t. so decided to make up on saturday. but she was supposedly busy. so yeahh. made it up on friday which was yesterday. weeee. nice game yeahh. so i guess syasya must be enjoying herself now while i`m so fucking bored. i wanna go out. i asked my mum and she allows me to! but the thing is, there`s practically no one at home. NOBODY. fuck larh. when i wanna go out, all got their own plans. when i`m so not free, people start asking me to go out. freak. now i`m having a bad day. lalalaa. serious larh. so bored. weii. how come nobody holla me. ohh i forgot. i didn`t give people my new number. great. i think i`m gonna sleep. ta.

the beauty exposed ;



Well. Todae. dada goin to Sentosa with darling sayang and co. ((: But at the same time. Saufi ajak go ska fest. Dada want to go to both. But i tink i put sayang darling as top priority laa.. ((: Thx for ajak-ING me k.. I hope it goes well. . . Im nervous and scared.. Fad doa kan saye aye? Klaa. Mit sayang dearest in few minutes tym. Gtg. Lom pack bag nie. Tata.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Well. I didnt haf tym to blog about yesterdae. How wasted. But yesterdae i went to pool with faddi, saufi and ali. It was. I was funnn!!! Superb fun. Holaa fun. And so today my dae went so ever smoothly for me. Yeah-NESS to me. ((: CAuse wen im in skewl. I had soo much laughter. After skewl. I too had a great laugh with my friends. ((: IF only my dae is like this everydae. Kan shiok.? So Faddie and Ali were late. Superb late. Nahh. Its okay. Upon arrival, saw Saufi. He gave me some of his drink. Nice. I were slow at loading that part when he said. "Anuar flavour" ((: Lol. Klakar kan.. Mane laa org tau.. So actuall. It was banana milk shake. Keke. And tt`s this super cute hunk standing beside me. And saufi saje je. He asked me. "You want his number? I take for eu." Nonsense. Haloo? Do i look like im the one who makes the 1st move? Well. I AM not. And i`m not soo desperate to al this 'kenal-kenal thingy. Hate laa. Cause those guys are out to destroy you and influence ur mind out. Eww. Traditional way is still the BEST.((: After the other of my friends arrived. we went straight to pool. Say syafik, my ngaji fren. Wei! Ape tengok-tengok? Cucok mate lu. Aku tau ko mengumpat pasal aku kan? So whatever laa. During the pool session. Guess what? Syasya play macam pro laa.. Hehe. I won three sets from the beginning. Winner stay. Loser out. After three sets. Bagi chance kan org lain. Cause i noe how sakit ye hati biler u win al the way and eu played al the wae. The rest sit down waiting for their chance. Boring kan.. An example is IBNIPUTRA. ((: Sori. And hey. There`s this guy who would often smile sheepishly at me. He observed me uh sei. I noticed that. Eww. Geli sak these guy perangai . . . He wanted my number. Cause he give me signal. Pointing to his phone. But i looked away. Too bad. . . But hey. Todae, there`s a lot of EYE candy today. ((: After pool. Heed to tampines mart. Went makan. And lepak with saufi, ali, faddi, and 2 of sopek`s fren. Funnnn. ((: And while we otw to Mc. There`s this guy who tot i`m 'shikin' Hahak,Paise la. But he CUTE. Eu noe. Mcm emo hunks or mat joker like tt?? More to japz uh. Cool. Wen i shooked my head. His kwn said. 'Die nak kenal-kenal laa' Haha. ((: Stop with this kenal-kenal thingy laa. Its been soo long since i wear baju rumah to kluar. And tell eu. That this week. There`s a handful of guys who asked for my numbers. Its kindda scared laa. And its soo tiring sae to sae no. Special attention. ((: Den. At night. Tok to abg wawal on the phone. Long. With my sleepy-NESS. I ye kan. He nagged at me. Yeah. I noe is my fault. I notis the changes in me. But eu haf to understand me too laa.. I lose that special someone who had once nurtured and moulded me to someone better. So now. When im standing on my on without him. Its like so obvious that my perangai drifted away rite...? Da laa. Im sori with my perangai. But i got patience too sei eu.. Understand me uh sei....... So see. i dun cursed eu like how eu assume i will kan.. Eu slalu tuduh org bukan-bukan. Like. WTF. Klaa. Tata.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, May 19, 2006


Bahh! Todae goes well in skewl. Though my results suck big time. I`ve expected it all along. That`s what i got fer procastinating and immature in handling stuffs huh. Deserve it cause u`re such a bump when comes to studying. But well. It was superb FUN in skewl. I had a great laugh with darling Jia Wei. Hakz. Thks. He cheered my dae up. ((: So i talk a lot todae. more than usual. I supposed. Gee. I got to see sayang dearest. Beenn sooo long since i sae tt huh? Anw. We smiled. Picking up slowly from where we left. But my perplexity and anxiety is still there. Maybe what faddie said is right after all. So.. My assupmtion is that my girlfriend understands my boyfriend well. ((: Yippee. So. I just hope all will goes well. I miss him soo bloody damn much. I`m sorry if i got do any mistakes. Kindda complicating laa. We didin`t fight. But. Laa. Whatever. I fear one thing. BUt i have to learn how to overcome my FEAR. It takes tym.. But dada doa my fear wun come. Can? Can? So ffaddie. waddya mean ur life is dead? Bedek uh. I should sae mine is one. Cause u ARE enjoying ur time with him mah.. Kan fun. I just want to feel how it`s like to have fun again with uy guy. I mean. I do haf fun wen im with him. But its soo diff laa compared to last tyms.... Get it. Tis tym. I dun do much with him. Grr. Its like u do your. I do mine. Get it? Oklaa. Let me blog about the happenings. 17 May 2005 I went out with my abg wawal. Ish. Tsk.Tsk. Da 11 daes tak see him. So we had fun. I had fun. Watched the da vinci code. Okaylaa the story. Must concentrate real hard. 1st part was boring. . . But it picked up soon after. And i were enjoying myself yesterday. I had to. I dun wan him to know what`s botherinh me. Never laa.. So. Before i mit him. Few guys asked my number. Yikes. Hehe. Cute. Cute. But well. Im not the type laa to give out my numbers. ((:What a waste sei cause got cute. Supe cute hunks. They in ITE simei. But whatever it is, i still thing of my sayang okay. He`s the priority. ((: Then. At night. Around 8 plus. I were on the way to railing 69. .These few guys kept looking. The first group, i noticed. Like duhh. I looked away. Den the next group, were like calling me and wolf whistle. Pls laa. Tts wat abg wawal told me. The guys called me. I were walking a lil 5 meter away from abg wawal. He tot i knew them. But i don`t. So maybe the guys tot i were alone laa.. Whatever. Dalla.. Tts all.. So now. Im waiting for the clock to ticks faster. Im heading for a game of pool with faddie, ali and saufi. ((: Yippee.. I lied. I told mom and dad i m going to night study. Hee. So anw. Tml. Sayang dearest ajak me go to Sentosa. Was sweet of him saying he wants to spend time with me and bring me to musical fountain as i wanted to go there badly . ((: Love eu bebeh. But. Nahh.. So he meet me at 11:30 am tml. ((: Den we mitting his frens at 12 noon. I hope all turns well tml. Realli hope laa.. Pls let it be. Miss him dearly. Faddie lend me tt top can? Thx. Pls?
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



boo. results are atrocious but nevertheless, it`s expected. it stinks thou. so i guess we`ll be playing pool. and yes, i`m 'celebrating' for getting such crappy marks. well, it`s the last time i`ll get to enjoy before i let my parents know about my results which is so dissatisfactory and will however, dishearten them. i`m sorry okay. i`ll do well for my prelims, i hope. ohh well. let`s not talk about this anymore. so it`s "speak good english" week. weeee. we`re so encourage to speak good english and we`ll be somehow like rewarded with stamps[i suppose] and those with the most number of stamps or Godknowswhat, will be prized-a $5 voucher. hmmm. ohh. i was supposed to do my d&t straight after school but i had to fetch my brother and sister from school. so my beloved teacher gave me this ur-wish-kinda look. ohh well. so i have to make up for today which will be tmr. yay. i`m glad that i`ve started my artefact thou it`s just pieces of wood. weeeeee. i`m not the last one to start afterall. cool. so then again, life`s been so dead. contradicting aye. but hell whatever. i`m just waiting for syaa`s msg to inform me what time to meet up. ohh. i so so so wanna go to the flicks. it`s been ages since i last went there. and this year, i`ve only manage to catch only one movie. yeahh. compared to the previous years, at least once a month i`ll catch a movie. but yeahh. understand understood. busy. uh huh. kaylarh. syaa, do holla at me okay? *hugs&smooches*

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, May 18, 2006


holla. do u know how bored am i? MEGA. really. okay i`m always complaining that i`m bored but what to do. hmmm. so malay results sucks, totally. i did bad. so i`m preparing for the worse for tmr`s papers. hmmm. wish me luck okay to whoever out there reading this. my ears are plugged to if i were u. i miss u laaa shithead. so yeahh. syaa, i called u cos they are fighting. yeahh. again. uh huh. tried calling ur home. got thru but u didn`t pick up thou i guess ur home. then i called ur phone. miss call. then called ur home back several times but engage. so yeahh. so i guess ur not going school huh tmr? well then. take care at home. and on monday too okay? get well soon. so i shall live like once how i led my life again. so arsenal lost to barcelona. 2-1. okay larh. i`m gonna turn in now. so bored. practically nothing to do so let`s go to dreamland. weeeeeee~

the beauty exposed ;



Its 3 minutees to 1. And mind eu, its am. So. i`m not yet aslp. Been receiving calls from Ali. And it`s soo freaking irritating. Grr. So. Im not supposed to be staying up this late. . Deng. So. Let me tell ya. He finally messaged me. Ard 9 plus just now. ((: Told me that he loves me alwaez and miss me veri3 much. Well. Syasya dunnoe laa.. Miss him too. Effing much. So he ajak go sentosa tis saturdae. Grr. I want to go. But i have plans. Most prob. I cancel my plan to join them. In tts the case, i can spend precious time with him.((: So miss him laa. Cant wait for skewl. Cause i get to see him. But hey. Results will be out. I wil fucking fail all the wae. So. Tell me. Wat am i sppose to do todae. This thing is soo minor. But. I had enuf laa. Wait. And wait. And wait. . Deng. Shall see tml. Follow the flow baby. Klaa. Tata. NItez to eu.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, May 17, 2006


i just received a msg. his out meeting her. [the lad who assume to be not in good terms with u, syaa] yeahh. he said there`s something to talk about. whatever larh. talk for as long as u want. remember to send her home okay. ohh well, i can`t reply u. kwang kwang kwang. there`s this anonymous who keeps on calling me. sucker. i`m so fed up. okay. just a few minutes ago, i spoke the first word to my mum since the silence in the morning. she`s going to NTUC. then i say "i want chocolate." at least i said something. if she buys me chocolate, then i`m gonna talk to her. like small kid sia me. but whatever. i`m so fucking bored. seriously. okay. just now there`s this guy who added me in msn. cool. not bad looking larh. but his working already. i don`t know if he completed his studies or not. looks like no. he works room service at Godknowswhatcarlton. yeahh. finally, i signed in my space. it`s been decades since i last log in. seriously. in sec 3? the moment when i was self-proclaiming that i was agnes monica. lol! pathetic lorr. but whatever. okay. now i`m feeling the urge to talk to him on the phone. but no thank u. i`m not calling him. i want my hand phone badly. with new bill. so i can start msging again. weeeee. ohh. i so gonna love downtown. with it`s ferris wheel, cinema, bowling, nightclub. weeeeee. but as if i`m allowed to go. ohh well.

the beauty exposed ;



i am so freaking bored. everyone is, i assume. i had a conflict with my mum. and next up, my dad. why? because of my usage on hand phone. i mean like i don`t exceed or anything. i was being compared to my brother who only messaged 300 and i, 1000. free what. use lorr. my total call is like 10 hours. again. free mahh. but hell whatever. early in the morning my mum went like "u don`t wanna go out?" and now i can`t because of that conflict. well, according to my prediction[chey!] i will no longer be using my hand phone as frequent because firstly, my mid year results. i totally screw 'em. argh. but it`s too late to regret. why cry over spilt milk right? hmm. well, carl understands my situation. THANK GOD he was born. lollies. i`m trying to figure out syasya`s thingy. what could have happened? hmmm. i will try to help me thou i don`t know what i can do. *brain on work* anyways syaa, thanks for sparring me that one msg. i`m beginning to get sleepy. i`m lazy for all this updates. no mood. and i haven`t eat since morning. only 5 slices of bread. poor me. fuck boredom.

the beauty exposed ;



It`s holidae fer DUNMAN SEC! Yuhooo. Tooddles.((: Sp i woke up earLy todae. And it is suprisingLY early. About 8 in the morning. Switched on my hp. Got a message from abg wawal. And it makes me smile even wider when i received a message from him. But. Whatever.
Don`t hold this against me
I`ve already said i`m sorry.
I hope eu choke on every word eu spoke when you
were screaming at me.
And realised how many tries i`ve tried, but
that`s a wishful thinking.
All i want is an apology for what eu did and
how eu treated me.
Get me far away, or at least as far as this car
will take me.
So. My mom bought me cheese spread. Yummy. At first. Wanted to eat my breakfast. But my mom bought a mayonesse instead. Hakz!!! Grr. Its a mixed up. And there goes me eating chese spread. Nahh. Its okay. Though that counts rite. So. Thx mom. So. Dada helpmed my mom do the house chores. Early in the morning. I did the washing of dishes. Rajin kan. HAa. Self- praised. ((:
So i hog on the fone with faddie. Maybe she felt that i`ve been used. Tts what i felt too laa. But i want him to know what i felt. Tts y i didnt want to meet him todae. Nor tml. I dunnoe. But i miss him. Grr. U see. My ego is controlling me. Lalala. Klaa. Im tired to blog.
Nid to go out fer a while. ((: At last. But actually. Im too lazy laa.. And this throat is killing me again. . . Maybe there`s internal bleeding larh. Never noe. I feel theres blood in my mouth laa. Gosh. This make me scared. . . .
Anywae. Plans to go for a game of pool has been cancelled. Tsk. Thats alrite. We made it up on FRIDAE. There`s night study. . Deng! U noe i n oe huh? Keke. ((:
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, May 16, 2006


Oh well. It has beeen several daeys since i blog. I feel like ages. But actually, its only been a dae since i missED blogging. So toae. FINALLY. Mid year is over. Im well double scared. I knew the results will be bad. VERY bad. . . Ive been slacking this mid year. And i will buck up double hard fer my PRELIMS. And i mean it. I hope soo. So let me tell eu. I`ve been sleeping from the time im sleeping until now. I am soo soo bored. There`s nothing i can do. So. Sleeping is the solution fer now. Until i find remedies for my boreness. So. Ive been not enjoying for the past two daes. Yesterday and todae. Gee. Im afraid. Why is he acting so weird? So. We are not on talikng terms. Msg tidak. Bubual pn jarang. Gawd. Y does this happened? We didnt fight. That`s for sure. Angin takde. Ribut pn takde. Dada takmu laa.. Anything. Pls. Tell me what`s wrong with eu? Dada suspected that its about yesterday. DENG! But actually what happened? The only thing i know is that yesterday when i see him in the hall. I dunnoe if i smiled at him. Cause i dont seem to see him. I wore the wrong specs so its blurred vision for me. If thats the reaason. Im sorry k. BUt tts a small matter. Yea. He messaged me yesterday saying that if i got problems, i should talk to him. There`s no problem with me. Th only thing is that boi i miss you. Im feeling soo helpless. How i wish i could talk to him now. This moment. I need him larh. Dada is not guilty of anything. But y are we acting soo weird? Faddie! Help me. So. im sorry. I off my hp. Im feeling soo sad. My eyes are tearing. I nid him. GRr. I feel so sorry for myself. Okay. Tell me how am i supposed to adapt myself when at the first place. There`s nothing wrong ale ale. Sb`s giving me a cold shoulder. WaS it something that i`ve done. Sth that i said. At least give me a response laa.. Like org kat cni bodoh. Ter wait. Wait kan his message and stuffs. Firstly. Dada want to know uh. Y kite behaving like this. Grr. So immature larh. Kan. kan. So WTF. I feel like sreaming my lungs out bebeh. Tell me where did i go wrong? Fine uh. Since u make the first move. I shall follow the fLOW. Its not that i want. Tell me. What kind of relationship is this when the only happiness u`ve got most of the time is when the two of eu is together. And it is rarely for both of eu to go out. What more, eu didnt even message that often nor hog on the phone. Mutual contact. And thats it. Phuck larh. I am so pissed off. I love him. Yes i do. But this is not what i want in a relationship. I am not being demanding or so. But u have to undertsand my situation and not look at your point of view only huh? I shall adapt to this kind of situation. Since u give me this shit. I will give eu back the shits. Fair play? Yea rite? Ive never felt any worse before. And i am recovering slowing. Taking things up ever slowly. I wil not give a fcuking care. I do not care less what eu feel. So. Maybe i am dependent on him now. Maybe fer the whole of last week. I am on cloud NINE. Since i can meet you everydae. But it seems to be back to the olden days. So. Its like another 9 more days to go. And i do not give any fcuking care to those shits. Its no big deal to me bebeh. Maybe i am following my anger-NESSS. I dun feel like typing the words out. I feel like talking. Ranting on and on and on. But nobody would care less. Grr. And tts soo sad. No call. No message. No news from eu. Im visible. So much for your love towards me huh. Words cant describe you love huh? WTF. Fine. Im invisible larh. Back off bebeh. So much for missing eu.. YYah. I do admit that i fucking miss eu laa. No use complaining rite. I dont gain anything from complaining. Cb laa.. Dada dont want things to turn out this way laa. We are happi. Suddenly. Ka-Booom! Cb kan. But i love eu still. HelplessLY waiting fer some reply. Shesh. Ive lost my mood. Thkx to this litte darn thingy. Pissed me off when ive got this bloody sorethroat. Fucking pain. Making me more pissed off. Cb. It hurts. Swallowing my saliva is like hard. What more if i eat? So have not been eating well since 3612951295189 daes. Yea. My appetite is not as big as last tym. I miss him laa. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, May 14, 2006


Hey. Attention everyone. This will be my last entry. I am barred from using the comp. )): Looks like i have to find a new hobby huh. And whats that? Back to reading books . MAYBE. .
So. After todae i will 'curi-curi' to play the comp. Grr. How LAME ca that be? Deng! Okay. Ive been sleeping fer ages. Gawd. But my eyes are still sleepy. And today is just like any typical daez. Kinda bored. Just like last tym. Where not much messages from him. Not much call from abg wawal. No one bother me like how faddie used to. . People becoming more busy as each day passes-by. And im becoming lonelier. Is there such word? WTH. ((: Or hey..
This tym using prepaid, is so truly boring. No one to message me. Haha. What do you expect if there`s only 3 people that know the existence of your number. Well. Dada miss the 8112.... line. I wonder if there`s any one who still find me through there.
So. Dada. Misses sayang dearest. . . But todae is not soooo exggerating like those previous days. Why ehk. Hmm. Thinking. Grr. Nah dun tink too much..
Hey! Todae. It`s 14 of the month right? Ala.. I missed again to see the FULL moon. It`s been 2 months since i see it. Da lamer gitu tak go beach. 2 months plus gitu ader uh. . Miss those tym. Haha. That tym. Me and him just knew each other. But aik. Da rapat jugak sei tt tym. . So fast.Hmm. Klaa. Syasya wanna continue zzzZ b4 pple spot me using the comp. Lalala.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



I pray that faddie`s dream wun and NEVER come true. Puh-LEASE... I`ll be a good freind okay starting fer todae. ((: I promise that i will listen to all of your stories before i say bye. ((:
Okay. I woke up 10 plus. And soo. I`ve cleaned my bedroom. Yippee.. Boleh datang raye daa.. So anywae. It`s mother`s day laa todae. Dada daa bagi pn my presents to ibu dearest. . . ((: Hapi Mother`s Dae aye?
Okaylaa. Syasya nid to help ibu do house chores. She`s not suppose to do any house chores todae u see. Bt takpelaa. She helped me.. Weee... ((: Dada sooo GELI to clean the kitchen. Yuckss. Not my cup of tea yeah. . Toddles.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Itulah ibuKU. 'Ibu.Ibu. EngkauLAH... RATU hatiKU..' I love you sooo much! Mwwahh!! *Hugs&Kisses*
Oh well. Its past midnight. So so. The clock indicates. Its 14. And happi mothers dae to all mothers in the whole wide world. Gee. Im still awake. ((: Busy chatting. Friendster-ING, blogging. And finnaly. Ive changed the template. Fuh. Getting used to tis stuff. ((: Hapi lei.
Okay faddie. Im sori. Didnt tok much just now when online. I tot eu busy mah. . . Deng. Oh well a short entry from me. Toodles. Gonna slp.. Zzz. Miss r square soo. . . ((:
Here`s a special direct broadcast from dada. From the bottom of my heart. A special dedication that os specially for all mothers out dere. Hapi MOther`s Dae to eu. .
And a very special heart felt goes to my IBU dearest..!! Hapi hapi alwaez okay. Thx fer taking care of me all deze yrs. Much appreciated. I love eu ibu. Though i dun sae tt much. .
Heres to abg wawal`s mom. . To Cik Sal. Cik. Selamat Hari Ibu k cik? Saye anggap cik mcm ibu saya jugak.((: I love eu like how i love my mom. And i noe that u still care fer me. Thx. And cik takmu lupe syahidah k cik. Whatever it is. syahidah tetap 'anak' cik kan. Cause syahidah tak nak hilang ABANG kesayangan syahidah. . Selamat Hari Ibu cik..((: I miss you sekeluarga.
Dedicated to fafad`s mom. Cik Ruzi. Slamat Hari Ibu aye? Yeye. Cik memang saya anggap as one of my ibu(s). Hehe. Kan cik? I hope u have a great mother`s dae. I love eu too okay cik? Hehe((: Shy laaa.. Hapi Mother`s Dae Cik Ruzi!!!
And now. Syasya nak wish dearest sayang ye mom. . Hapi Mother`s Dae cik!! Grr. Im scared to wish cik. Tapi kat blog pn jadik. Sori cik. Tapi Niat syasya baik. Nak wish cik. Semoga cik hapi hapi alwaez k. Enjoy this dae okay. And syasya harap cik haf a great mothers dae okay. ((:
So well. I wish all of the mothers. And let me shout it out loud to all mothers out dere. Hapi Mother`s Dae to eu alrite.
Anyone`s missing? Sori if i left eu out. . Haf a happi SUNDAY. .
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



okay. syasya`s not entertaining me at msn. ohh well. lucky there`s 7 other people here. shoot me.

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, May 13, 2006


Dada miss the tym wen we go out together. Hmm. Ya. We go out but dere`s always the bag. Grr. I miss sayang dearest. Takpe. Picture pn jadi k. Dada gile laa.. Mabuk rindu.. )): Cute kan dier. Rambut. . . Hehehe Bluek!
Bah! Yikes. The dae was such a dragg. Until sayang dearest messaged me. "Do eu want to go library?" Hee. Yipe. At first i tot, wahh. Rajin sei sayang kite nk blajar. But at last. He confessed that its me he wants to meet. Not studying.. Haa.. Its better fer eu to tell me straightforward right. . . ((: Okay. It was hillarious. I miss him soo. And well. I get to see him. How great can that be? Thx to HIM. And thx sayang. And i had a great laugh baby. ((:
And let me share tis. He felt like taking a bus ride. Klakar laa.. AS if taking a stroll. But in a bus.. Hee.. Tak pernah dada come across this. Throughout that time, i disturb him. Argh! Fun laaa. Den he disturb me about my baju. Asking me to give the BANGLAS wear them. Hmph! Bluek uh!! So dada missss him. Yeah- NESS to me. All smiling. ((: Got to see his smile. Hear his laughter. Get to feel my bolster. I get to be close to him. Yeah. The warmth. Ohhh.. How i miss sayang dearest.
Klaaa. I wanna go to bed. Wanna dream about sayang. I miss himm laa. Grr.. U see. Dada just get to see him. Yet the missing-NESS is still dere. WTH. Brr.. Let me send all my missing-NESS to the wind. . . I hope it will reach to sayang dearest. I can tell that im falling in love with you.. Its real. ((: Im losing my head. Hugs and kisses!! Eww. Dada!
Klaa. Nitez baby. Keep on smiling sayang. Fad! I miss him! ((: Double LAME laaa dada.
``Syasya-

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Hey. Have been doing nothing since morning. Besides eating MURuKU. So i woke up early todae. ((: Read a malay book. 'Trilogi Cinta'. So i got a msg from sayang dearest. Teling me that he miss me. Miss me. Miss me soo much. ((: R eu serious? Miss eu too sayang!!! Grr. I want to meet eu badly too. But cant kan? So stop complaining and move on lor. Dada still and am countying the days to MONDAE. ITs not that im looking forward to exams. . . Deng. But im looking forward to meet my sayang dearest in the hall. And also in skewl. I am so supper miss him lor.
Dada MISS sayang dearest a lot. I miss my bantal busuk. I miss the way he made me smile. I miss the wae he made me feel ticklish. I miss his smile. I miss everything about sayang dearest. I yearn to see him. Anoder 2 more days till mondae. Tts` soo long. . . .
And todae abg wawal kol me. And hey i loike the conversation todae!! Yippee.. Had a lot of laughter todae. But hey what eu said all is so i cant go back to that situation sei. Guess what. Abg wawal told me that he terase nak be with me again. Den i sae laa. Cakap senang huh. U haf to understand okay. . . Hmm. Im am and truly sorri okay. I just cant do anything. I am setia- ING to sayang dearest. And i love him so.. Cause ive been missing him even more as each daez passes-by. )):
But hey that doesnt mean that i dont love eu still rite. A promise i would hold fer eternity alritez. If matair lei cari. but kawan klu hilang susah nk dapat balek kan. But i dun wan to lose my loved ones. Pls.Pls.
Okay. I gtg. Anw, Fad. Sape ye friendster u asked me to see? Deng. Deng. So. Sb`s in loving mood huh? Hee. All the besy yah. Takmu lupe aku yah. ** Winks**
And hey abg wawal got sae. "Eu. Wait fer next year. 0804 @ 2:33. I akan sound eu back. Takpe laa klu u still with dier. As long as i got what i want to sae to eu. . . " Deng! Gawd. Is he joking. Tts like crazy. Pls lor. Im thankful to that. I can see and sense that he truly love me. Its hard fer him to go thru this situation. Imagine that whoever u love is happi with some other people but not eu. Hmm. Truly i am so sorri. Wec shall see okay. People change. Feelings can change too. And soo i effing miss the tym wen dada and abg wawal tok so happily. Yeah-NESS to me..
Da laa. Chiao fer now. So todae i went to abg wawal friendster. He asked me to see his page. After so long i will. As i`ve made a promise to him.
And. Hey. I feel like dying my hair ler.. Its been super long since i did all that. Since i noe abg wawal like 2 years back? Thx to him that im not like those minahs. Maybe. But i`ve made a promise to abg wawal that i wld never dye my hair ever again. His mom loike me fer who i am and anw, dying hair wld potray a bad image to the elders. Yeah, I agreed. But Its been soo long since i dyed my hair. I wanna try. But again. I`ve promised rite. Promises are not meant to be broken. Tt`s one of my life motto. Unless i can talk around to abg dearest. . .
Hey it HILMI and HILMAN bdae laa. The twins. ((: So hilman was my primary 2 crush . . Deng!
And hilmi was my EX! Haa. Primary skewl LURB. Kekekeke. So.
Hapi 17th BDAE yeah to BOTH of eu!!

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I woke up it was 7 Waited till 11 just to figure out that no one would call I think i got a lot of friends but I don't hear from them What's another night all alone? When your spending everyday on you own and here it goes I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare I'm just a kid, I know that its not fair Nobody cares, cause I'm alone and the world is having more fun than me And maybe when the night is dead, i'll crawl into my bed Staring at these 4 walls again I'll try to think about the last time, I had good time Everyone's got somewhere to go And their gonna leave me here on my own What the hell is wrong with me? don't fit in with anybody How did this happen to me? Wide awake I'm bored and I can't fall asleep cause every night is the worst night ever ___________________________________ wakaka. suddenly this song emerges in my mind. i have nothing better to do. been awake since 9am. surprisingly early. sicne then, eat and eat and eat. shit and shit and shit. seriously, my stomach`s rude early in the morning. whenever i eat, i feel like shitting. grr. so anyway, look`s like it`s gonna rain. no where to head. ohh. my granny from johor is here. alarrh. till tmr only. there`ll be a wedding tmr that`s why she`s here. i`m still thankful that she`s here with me now relating to the past. awww. okay. so again, msged hiim till midnight. syaa, go take a look his friendster. read his profile CLOSELY. and boy. he sure has lots of girls. wakaka. i`m just trying to know him. what`s he`s like and all. but but but. argh. whatever larh. i`m still in that guy thou. but hell whatever. argh. fcuk love and all laaa. i just don`t know why but i`m having this weird feeling. abou what or whom? i seriously don`t know. i`m just feeling uncomfortable with this thingy inside me. arggghhh!! [[this entry is super lame. i don`t even know what i`m saying. do u? i think i`ve gone insane.]] i can fly. can u fly?

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, May 12, 2006


i`m feeling tired now. after eating lots of food. currently, i`m busy chatting with 6 people? fun. long time never go online and have a good chat. hmmm. why aren`t this people sleeping? [[speak for urself, faddie]] *yawnzZzZz* sleepy yet entertained my many people. syaa. he`s sweet. hahah. sweet talkers. argh. i`m so worn out. to be continued. *smooches*

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Chiak. Okay. I forgot to post this. But. Let me ask. What if. Nahh. Put yourself in this scenario okay.
You are attached. But u`ve got this ex. Just the previous ex saying that he misses eu. Still love eu and stuffs. Even to an extend that he said he will wait fer you still. What would eu do?
The thing about yourself is that u already fallen for your current guy. But still somewhere deep in your heart your ex still existed in you and the care, concern and love for your ex is also there. Love to an extend that i dont know how to explain. -_-" IF only u cld go back to your ex. But u`ve already love your current guy sososoooo much. But certain times, you miss your ex too. But what would you do when hes dere pouring what he felt within him.
Tell me what will you do. . . . .
I ws just wondering.
``Syasya-

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Yikes. Todae is a public holidae. Hip hip. Hooray! That means i`ve got an extra day fer me to laze around. And that also means that i can look forward to waking up later rire. Hee. But i woke up early todae. Ard 10 plus. Unlikely of me to wake up at such time when i am soo lethrgic and worn-off. . . But that was okay. First thing i did was to call abg wawal. Ive promised because he called me around 12:30am but i was too tired to talk. Well, Im sorry. I was waiting fer dearest sayang to msg or call. He diid. But i received his message at a later note as there isnt any reception. Grr. And so. I miss my sayang la.. I dreamt of sayang dearest.. So i dreamt that my kitchen was burnt. And i was scared. Then i called abg wawal. And zhafir ajak me to work with him in order to get money to reconstruct the kitchen again. But hey didnt dream of fad. Blablabla.
So dada rot at home todae. Manage to read a storybook. ((: After soo long. And i spent my time watching tv. Tick tock tick tock. Tv watch me.((: I was awake when i heard the telephone ring. Guess what ? Sayang dearest called me!!! Yippee. Didnt expect him to call laa.. All smile. And he has been assking me to eat my ubat. . . And he told me that i`ve been procastinating since yesterday. Hmm. Well. I hate the medicines okay. But I still ate them after talking to sayang dearest. ((: So. Now its 5pm. Im soo hungry. Been eating crackers since morning. Nice. Okalaa. Ive been wondering what fafad `s doing now. Hmm. Good luck fer ur madrasah okay? Fad tml wanna go swimming?? Hmmm. Guei bored sei. Suppose that i go out with zhafir today but i dun want. Yeah. He my friend. N harm. But he always sae words like. Jadi matair aku uh. All those i love eu stuffs. Even if he`s joking, i assume, im not soo comfortable sei with his perangai. Yea. Im rapat with him. But better be safe than sorry kan.
Klaa. Anw. Happi Bdae Abg iwan!!! Happi Bdae zhafir!!! And it will be HILMI and HILMAN bdae next which is tml, 13 May. I miss them lorr. Pats few daes i saw hilmi at the interchange.. He tegur me. So, he`s in ITE now. What a waste. Aggregate high but u`re in ite? Nvm study hard okay. So. Hapi Advanced Bdae orite to eu twins. ((:
Klaa. Singning off now. Tata- Not much to be said todae. But i miss sayang dearest. . .
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



confessions- i wrote a bloody long entry yesterday and the freaking computer hanged and the freaking internet connection screwed. great. so let me summarise what i wrote. tuition was fun. lots of laughter here and there. we were talking about Singapore`s state before the Japanese attack. so then went to donwntown to have my dinner with my brother. and yeahh. he msged me. heh. but hell whatever. ohh. msged with dre till midnight. awesome. yesterday`s dimensi 4 wasn`t that frightening. dot. dot. dot. i woke up early this morning. hmm at 9.30am. i heard my ayah`s voice and tadaa i jumped off the bed. had home made pancake for breakfast. yummy yummy. watched this story air mata ibu so emotional. i mean in every scene, well not every but most, there will be tears. okay larh the story is sad thou. my aunty`s gonna celebrate mother`s day at my granny`s house in the evening. weee~ food! yeahh. awesome. food`s my second best friend. so today there`s no plan. no where to head. i wonder what`s syaa`s up to today. hmmm. hope u`ll rot at home like me. heh. seriously, there`s no where to head. i asked my ibu to go to queensway just to burn time but unfortunately, today`s a public holiday so it`s close. my ayah asked me how was math paper 2. i went like "hard! i`ve never been exposed to that kind of questions" his face showed an angry, confrim fail, disappointed yet whatever kind of look. i`m sorry okay. i really am. i can`t do well for this mid year exam. i`m ohh so not well prepared. i don`t know what have i been doing for the past 5 months? arg. now prelim`s coming. ehrk? i think so. yeahh. so now must work hard. must prove to my parent`s and those idiotic shitheads esp u[that guy] that i can do it. so what if ur in the express stream. i`ll be sitting for my o levels sooner than u are. u have like another year to go before ur o level. hmph. get lost, freak. i`m so bored. lalalaa~ seriously i thought today was saturday. feel`s like. i have to hafal my surah for madrasah. argh. brain`s not working anymore. all inside are plain blank, for now. i feel like going for a swim, theme park, pool and the list goes on. but sadly, no. i just remembered. i have like another 5 papers to go?¿? (1) design & technology. (2) math paper 1. (3) literature paper 1. (4) science physics and chemistry paper 1. (5) mt listening compre. that`s like a lot. but again, my weekends are burn just like that. hmm. since i`ll be going to my granny`s house. i wish i could bump into him. he stays near that what. heh. but hell whatever. kaylarh. i wanna watch tv. senario. weee~ *smooches*

the beauty exposed ;

Thursday, May 11, 2006


.
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Wei. Faddie. I updated tis blog. But i do simple one only. I promise i do again. This is temporary only. Because im getting bored with the old one. Though this tym is totally boring and no kick at all. Tui pu chi.. So. I find tis time template much much more neater laa.. But ive been using the com ever since i reached home sine 2 plus just now. Yet i cant find any attractive skins.. Wasting time lor. . . But its okay. So. I miss eu also laa. And him(s) too. Im in a jaillor. Hu wan to go out with me? Anyone. Hehe. Klaa . Tata. Slepping soon. ((: Tata. Night okay fad.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Hey. Grr. Dada miiss sayang dearest uh. .Seriously. Gosh. I miss eu laa. Its gonna be a longg weekend. And its not even a day and im hella miss you soo much. Gawd. . . )): Im listening to tis song. Malay song. Hear tis.
..:Ku senang bila kau cemburu. Itu tanda ku sayangi ku. . Ku juga suka bila kau curiga. Ia mengajar ku erti setia. Walaupun sering ku tinggalkan. Itu tiada bermakna kau ku abaikan:..
So let me rant. I miss dearest sayang. Ohh. I just hate the weekends. I doubled miss him uh. I miss him. I miss him.
I miss him. I miss him. I miss you. I miss you.
If only u are here beside me. IF only. . Grr. I miss ur companion laa.
The laughs. I miss my bolster. ((:
I just miss sayang terribly okay.
Its no fun being in this state.
I wanna shout out loud that i miss my bebeh!!
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Well. Im bored now. At least. I got something to do. I looking fer blogskins. Need to revamp all this. I try okay. . . Hehe. OkAY. Chemistry was okay. A lil hard. But weel. A failing grade is expected. So. Hey remind me to bring money fer O level fees okay. Bought Mother`s Day gift todae. . NOthing much to say laa. Bubbye. Didnt get to see lots of sayang dearest. . Its okay. It will be a longggggggg weekend. How nice. But i wun get the chance to see dalynk. Aww. Klaa. Bubbye. Tata- ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Dada so famished. Wee. Todae we gonna have chemistry paper/,Its hard. Konfem fail again rite. As expected. But shy seit if compare to de other class. Argh. Ranking is essentially important these days. We are all based on meritocarcy. Well. Wanna enjoy in life? Better do well academically. So im awake. Not yet bathe. ((: But im eating myojo thai tomyam cup noodle. Hee. Im not unhygienic. But well. Im hungry. But i did brush my teeth earlier on. So, while im blogging now, dearest sayang is in skewl doing his A maths paper. Good luck okay. *winks* Chiayou! ((: So. Ive yet to study chem. I slept yesterday cause i were tired. So exhausted from skewl stuffs. Grr. Hey i got a black ring around my eyes. Aww.. Panda eyes. How horrible. So. My resolution is to sleep tml, sat and sunday. In order to get ring of those horrendous ungly rings. Eww. Fad must be sleeping huh? Fad help me later? Pls. Pls. )): So didnt manage to blog yesterday. Cause my bro use the com. As always. Anw, Yesterdae in skewl. Reached dere quite late. 5 +. And hey i saw asri. Tis tym. It must e him. Oh ya!! Todae is abg nizam bdae! Hapi bdae abg!! I miss you laa. Shit eu!I soo damn seriously miss eu. Lame tak tok kan. Grr. And yesterdae was bored laa. Not as alwaes where we have the gradual laughs that accompany our nights. Maybe i was tired. I didnt talk much. And tts it. Sounds soo formall yesterdae. And soo i miss the faddie and dearest sayang self. . . . And of course myself. I seriously tink i ought to draw a line that set me back from thinking about the past and present. Grr. . . Elaborations not compulsory. . . Hey broadband bill has arrived.. Grr. It sums to a well nice $135 bill. And my sis demand me for money. What shit! !@$@%%*)*)R%&@ Halooooo. Im not working okay. U tink i chop money issit huh. Biatch! Well. Im not close to my sayang sis animore. She soo eksyen deze daes. And i fcuking miss the time when we had out storytelling, massaging time. Shiok kan. Now, i dun share my life story to ani1 except fadd. She dun even knoe about dearest sayang story. . Oni see his pics b4. And i want to tell her more about whats happening around me. But. Laa. NVM. Okay laa. Im tired. Im gonna slp laa. Toodles. Oh yaa. I miss myself laaa.. No laa. Miss my dearest sayang, fafad. . . And i miss the old abg wawal. Y kite da tak hapi ehk? QUESTION MARK. . . . ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Wednesday, May 10, 2006


beep beep. i`m home. just finished eating haagen-daz[is that the spelling? ohh well]. yummy. it`s been long since i ate that. and great. now i`m sneezing. arrcchhhooo. sensitive nose plus sensitive eyes equals to fragile me. nonsense. arg. i`m so sleepy so i`m gonna blog a very brief entry. today, school was not 'normal'. usually, those who arrive after 7.20++ will be hold back at the gate. but not today. so today, i got to see only a glimpse of him. but nvm. who cares anyway. paper sucks. totally. went home. watched tevee. sweet 16-mtv. ohh i just adore their dresses and parties. weee. tmr`s paper starts at 11. yay me. i can have a super duper long sleep. zZzZ. lazy butthole me. hey! i`m tired after all that 'studying' in school. syaa. sorry just now no mood. needed to deposit money to back. urgent. but now i`m okay. i`m fine. sorry for not entertaining u. so u must be prolly be complaining at home about school just now. hmmm. i don`t know. whatever larh. there`s incredible tales tonight! wee. go watch okay peepz? ehh. on a second thought. DON`T. or u`ll end up like me[well, for those who are cowards] according to the previous episode, the toyol thingy. opps. i`m not gonna say that again. woo. scary. kaylar wanna doze off. muahh muahh.

the beauty exposed ;



home alone. just waiting the clock to strike 3++ then i shall leave the house. off to school. i wonder what`s dada doing. hmmm. yesterday was boring. really boring. didn`t manage to study for physics and math yesterday due to my heavy eyes. i pity them so i slept. so serve me right for not studying. was struggling while doing the paper. not surprisingly, i will flug my math paper 2. i didn`t complete all the questions. imagine, the first question i left it blank. there`s this paper where i only wrote the question number and then i handed it up. totally blank. arg. screwed up all the papers larh. thought didn`t wanna fail my mid year cos i`ve already done bad in my common test. horrible marks. eww. so i thought i`ve learnt a lesson and made a resolution to study. but what the heck. i didn`t. the existence of procrastination has long been planted in me. that makes me double lazy. okay. tmr`s chemistry paper ONLY. i didn`t know there was physics paper until midnight yesterday. ohh yeahh. dada woke me up at 3 in the morning asking me to study. thanks yahhh. but did i? like duh~NO. okay. was 'scolded' by dada just now. prepaid thingy. okay. i`ll pay u! grr. sorry larh. so dimunitive yet loose lipped. ooppss. eheks. kaylar. i long for a nap now. tata bloggie. +hugs&smooches+

the beauty exposed ;



Argh shit. Im doomed. Its over for my physics and maths paper 2. Its todae. Oh well. Tts me fer being lazy. Good cause dada dun wan to study rite. So heres what u get. Grr. So. Im preparing myself fer the rest. I know all along that i will flunk my midyear. Eveything except fer malay. Freeak uh. I just got no mood fer this mid year uh. Y ehk. So im okay from all of my stressed up life. Maybe. But its too late laa. I recovered after my exams gonna end soon. Gee. And soo. I just love these past two days. I gotta spent my time with him. Aww. Cause we studied together laa. Which coprises more on talking issue than studying. But i loike. So far. Its like we are close. But oni for a period of tym jek kan. Den we shall be back to normal routine. Grr. No. No. Dadadun wan to go back to that. I want everyday to be like those days where i go to talk and talk and laugh and feel my time with dearest sayang. ((: Shiok. Like in lala land sei. But dada cannot be dependent on him okay. I nid to be independent all again. Remember okay. Oh yah. Just now while i was doing my paper. I wwas thinking about something. Well. I afraid of it laa. Fear me. Hmm. I was thinking that its nearing to the national exams. . . And what if something like last year happened again to me huh? Get wat i mean? I never want that to happen. And im just freaking myself up. Im scared. Got tis vibe telling me to beware. Gears up. Tsk. Sedih laa like tt. Still remember vividly that just 5 days before n level last yr, sth tragic happened to me.. And physiacall it affect me. Mentally was worse. And i never want it to repeat itself. Oh gosh. Okaylaa. Im tired. Ill stop here. Nid to change. Oh yaa.. Faddie got a new nick. Wild boar is hers. ((: And hey. Guess what, yesterdae dada play pool with fafad. Den got tis guy came and asked fer my number. ((: Hes cute. Okaylaa. But dada never give uh my number. Im a good gerl laa. I`ll be setia to one. Haha. But seriouslaa.. Love tak pandang looks kan? Not totally. I m happi with what ive got. Sb to care, make me smile, joke around, <3 size="4">to tt guy. Hey. I love my guy okay. And to the gerls out dere. Dun mess with my man. ((: Hes mine. Hee. First tym sya sae like tis kan. Kan. But i said soo.. Obviously i dun wan any 3rd parties to involve kan. Tts not i called a relationship. Hearbreakers, tear-jerkers. How i loathe you guys. And if ever u play with my feelings. . . . . . . . . . . Tsk. Tsk. For now. Dada hapi with everything not all laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...So far. Let me declare that i love eu dearest sayang! Never know what will happen later. But klu kiter da tak together. Its okay. Not everything can last. . . Tts a good piece of advice. And to fafad. I love eu TWOoo.. And to abg wawal. I love eu THREEee.. So what? Im hapi as long my loved ones are there beside me kan. kAN. ((: Miss eu sayang dearest. . . . . . Gonna mit eu in few minutes tym. Yipee. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Wei. Im awake in the middle of the morning. I badly want to blog. - _-" So heres an entry dear bloggie. So anw, yesterdae i went to study with sayang dearest. ((: Guess wat. We realli spent our precious tym toking. On and on and on. Besids that, theres still more to that. Aww. We didnt realli study like how we studied the dae before. So. Here's a lesson to be learnt. We need the help pf FADDIe in order to push us to work. No people means there's secreacy and lot things will just happened. Hey dun get the wrong ideas okay. I swear im good. ((: Over my name bebeh. So i feel sleepy sooo many many time. Terlentok je. Tts the best part. So. sayang dearest. Thx okay. Much appreciated. So. Yesterday. We tok. And one of the topic is that. 'Did we ever fight?' Sadly, he said yes. On the dae of our firstie. Hmm. I dun consider we fight. Maybe ague. No. Hey. I gave in what. But maybe my words hurt him laa.. He told me that. And i am soo so truly sori k sayang. N besides that, we`ve been one great swithearts huh? Hakz. Okay i hope we wun fight okay. Its soo unhealthy fer the relationship. I promise i try my best to feed the relationship with essential vitamins. ((: So. Yesterdae he told me that the song cinta tiga segi is soo sad fer him Yea the song isss sadd. But hes getting all too emotional. Hmm y ehk. He told me its about his past relationship. Alaa.. So he misses his ex-es MAYBE. Alaaaa... = But that song i heard maybe months back.. Abg wawal ask me to hear. And he just LOATH to hear that song. Grr. Reason being that song is dada know rite what he meant. Yea. Okay. Pple cheer up k. So. Anw. Mrs Neo gave us chocolates. Yey. Free. And so. I make muke ot so oburuk yet infront of sayang dearest. Oh shit. Hee. I just dun care if hes dere or not. I`ll just yack and yack. Hee. Hey. I just cant show him the good side of me rite.. He must knwo myy BAD side. Backside!! HAhaha. Lame piece of me.. Okay laa.. So.. he told me anout what his papa said. About him studying real har. And stuffs. And after that later his papa will find a GIRLFRIEND fer him. The pretty ones sum more. Alaa. That tym wen he told me that. Okay i scared. Im scared. Dun tell me ive got to go. Cause i love eu. Always tinnk of the possibilities okay. What if. Hmm. Neh mind laa. Alwaeys ikot wat parents sa. Got berkat k sayang. I appreciate what u said. N i hop it will last and u meant what u said okay. ((: Push tis aside k.. Oh well. i tried calling abg wawal once. But he didnt pick up his hp. So. I wanted to wish HAPI Belated bdaE.!! But. And it seems ages since i tok to him. Let me tell eu tis. I dun wan and never want to severe my ties with my dearest abg wawal. No matter what he is still my one of my loved ones okay. Like how i love faddie. Like how i love dearest sayang. So plas. Pls. I dunnoe if he enjoyed his bdae not. I hope all goes well. And hey looking forward fer ur kol okay. Okaylaa. Im slpy. So. I miss sayang dearest already. i loike these past two daes. I love it. Separating me and sayang dearest is like putting a heavy weight on my back. Grr. Miss him sooo.. I miss eu sayang. I do.. ((: Thx fer that motivation. Study hard bebeh. Eu can do it. And i love eu darling. <3s> ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, May 09, 2006


weee. humanities paper DOWN. social studies was easy but IF ONLY i studied. and geography was okay. again, IF ONLY i studied. daa. no use crying over spilt milk right right. went to school with dada dear. first time after so long. hmmm. we should do that more often okay dada? yay! excited for school tmr but so not looking foward for exams! arg. i totally forgot there`s physics paper tmr. physics paper 2! and that`s like my weakness. and i`m still not stuying. tired larh. took a nap just now and yet, i still feel sleepy. okay freak. tmr is also math paper 2. also, my weakness. i haven`t been practicing and just hoping for lady luck to shine on me so that i can pass the paper. ohh well. FAT HOPE. arg. yesterday`s msges was fun! imu. dada must be enjoying herself right now. call me okay later? if i never answer means i`m already in lalaaland. kaylarh. got to go. signing off. faddie!! SMILE. =)

the beauty exposed ;



Todayy geography paper cummy Lit paper 1. Grr. I didnt studied fer my Lit at all. So i tot luck can help me with tt. Maybe im just being too complacent uh? Gd deserve tt. Anw. Paper was tough. Oh well. Usuall i manage to do my lit paper but fer todae, its totally different. )): NOt even a single thing did i manage to take a grasp on. Well, im digging my own grave huh? God. Help me. Aww.. So after tis meeting my sayang dearest to study. Hee. We will spend more on talking.. Hehe. Yeye!!((: So now im going to change and heed to pool with darling bestie. Yeye.. I loike!! Okaylaa. Toddless.. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, May 08, 2006


Syasya just reach home from skel. Grr. Guess wat. Its my social study paper todae. Grr. I didnt study it. Months back, ive planned not to flunk my exams fer mid year. But cant be helped. So. I just did my best. Uh! What a waste. I read the chapter on detterence and democracy. But not complete. Wasted. But whatever laa. So todae is abg wawal BDAE!! Yeye. Da 17 years old okay dier. ((: Da tua da pakcik!! Bunn kite.. And guess what that makes me feel all sad up todae? Hmm. If not, its been2 years and a month. Tts longg okay. But shattered though. I still remembered vividly. Two years and a month back. A bottle and a watch is his. I spent a lot on them. Opened the prresent near the taxi stand at tm. Bwa pizza hut. We went to watch movie. Movie tittled, 'Van Helsing'. . . Sill remember all. But sayang seribu kali sayang akhirnya kecundang juga. Tsk. Tsk. Okay watever. But the past cant seem to leave me alone uh.. Im still hanging on him sometimes. Howw. How. So happi bdae k awak? Hope u have a great time yah.. So tadi after skewl, dada and faddie went to mc. Eat brkfast. At paris. Yummy. And hey. Grr. Im mad at faiz slightly. Grr. Ade ke he add salt into my tea? AFter that, i dun drink it anymore. I shared fadfad drink. Thks okay fad? Hmph. Die laa yang merepek. Kol me merepek just bcoz i dun drink tt tea anymore. Like duh. I saw sayang dearest at skewl just now. Outside office. ((: Yeye. Managed to ask him how is he. Hes kay now. Seems to me. All smileys. Yeye. Hes back again!! Okay. Yea i miss him though we just meet yesterday huh. gRR.. So hows ur exam just now? Lucky yesterdae u read that notes huh? Yeye. I hope u can achieve a decent mark even if u fail okay? But i hope u pass.. Okaylaa. I end here. I going to take a napp.. I have to rest. Nid to go skewl later. Argh... Tired uh.. So faddie. Wake me up hor. Lollies. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, May 07, 2006


Well i just return home. Clock stated 10:56. Im beat. So i guess i update the happenings of 07 May 2006 tml okay? I get to see all my loved ones todae. Except fer sayang faddie.)): Still i miss you soo much okay? Toodles tok to ya again.

Happi Bdae to u in advance. Few more minutes to go. . .

``Syasya- Oh well. Halo. Ts is yesterdae's continuation. OhH. Is there such a word? Waever laa.. So yesterdae. I was planning to go study with bestie. But ended up cancelling it. Ive got a strong vibe that she cant go at 1st. So wen dearest sayang kol to go out, i agreed w/o asking faddie. Sorie bebeh. But i tot it wld be gd if u n dearest study together. Ape la.. So I get to meet sayang yesterday. Yippee. ((: But hey he sound so strez up in the phone earlier on. I knew something is wrong. Heart beating fast. So i was late. Again and again and again. As usual huh? And sayang dearest went to my block. Sit there for god knows how long. Kekeke. Sori okay? U planned last minute. Soo... ((: After that went to marine parade library. He got no mood to study at all. Sad. But i tried to push him to study. But hey. At least he read up chapter 6. Yeye!! I knew he has given up hope on humanities.. But sayang, chia you okay? Anw, we spent more tym on talking. I was feeling bad cause i cant cheer him on. All my talkativeness and lamest keep him abreast fer a while. Grr. And wen it came to silent, sayang dearest become all stressed again. Cian dier. But, i wonder. Wonder. Whats that problem of his? He said he dun want me to think about it much. Cause it will affect my studies? Huh? And he said its oni a small matter. Small matter that involve parents and teachers? Think. Think. Hmm. Ape2 laa. As long as it will go away sonn and stop bothering my sayang dearest mind. If it affect me, i guess its better dun tell me okay? So we laugh and laugh. As usual. ((: Oni thing, sometimes, he got no much mood and well, i have to behave rite? Give him silent fer a while. So we spent a little tym together. But at least. ((: Rather than none of it huh. Time flies really fast. So ard 3:50 we were outta library. Heed to tampines. Im gonna mit my ibu dearest,adek and abg wawal. Its an advanced celebration for abg wawal bdae. Best ehk. Im sooo jealous. And my mom wants to ajak him makan.. Its been long laa since i tok to abg wawal. Maybe 1 week? Hes been acting soo cold towards me latetl. Im suprised not to receive any news from him lately. But as tym passes, i will adapt. Chiayou sya! I was scared to meert abg wawal laa.. Dada scared i will just maintain silence. That is sooo unlike me. But dada dun wan to spoil the mood. Dada start to liven the situation. I was kecoh. ((: Fer a while. Ale2 terdiam. BUt overall, the bdae bash was fun. I wish tt time was my bdae lor. And i realli think that my ibu dearest realie love him. I cld sense it. My mom touch him. ((: Swit her. I mean she usap abg wawal ye face and nasihat him al tt. I dunnoe if she knew we not together. But i tink tt she miss him. Argh! Even my family misses him. I dunnoe if ifin and amy ingat abg wawal tak. But im sure they do. The tym wen he tok to dem. Play at the playground. Sigh. So well, ya syasya admit sya miss al those times. And ble kat pizza hut. Did i mention that we went to pizza hut? There u go. My mom dun even care my closeness with abg wawal. I mean she even said to abg wawal tt, about that manje thingy. OMG. Wen we were walking together, she even pull my adek aside in order to let abg wawal wok with me. Ohh. How great can eu be mummy? I love eu..!! But too bad, we da not together kan. So, wats the use? Tsk. Tsk. Seeing all tt makes me feeling nostalgic. So after that, we separated from mummy and adek. Abg wawal ajak go play pool. I agreed. But gt exam ehk. Hakz. Dada dun care. Cause im too strez up with stuffs. Grr. So it was not fun laa at pool. Cause i didnt tok much. Im just afraid that that outing will be the last tym we go out. Takmu gitu uh. Got that strong vibe. )): In the middle of the game, it turn out to be fun. And dada admit dada play kasar. I learnt the skill to hit the ball hard. So all the wae, i vent my anger at the ball. Kesian die. So the ball tercampak out of the table many many time. I was supposed to go library but instead i went to play pool. Ish. Ish. Sya. Sya. So wen nk kat alek. We chill at my bustop. I told him not to send me. But he will always insist. Anw , thx okay. So at the bustop. He asked y im acting so weird and not toking much. Grr. I kept quiet. But to escape from more queries, i started to tok. But he can see the faking me. Hmph. So we chatted. And he asked if he got see his friendster not. Anw, syasya da lame tak c his frenster. I cant take it laa.. Hmm. He told me he posted his picx with tis F-named gerl. And commented that i will sakit hati. And tts his main purpose he did tt. To make my heart burns. Thk god i didnt visit his. So he told me that he had enuf seeing my long posted pictures with dearest sayang. Sorii laa. But. Understand uh.. Da laa.. I tink tts about all. He told me misses me. But he did that so that i can gain my happpiness with dearest sayang. But hey. I dun wan to lose sei my kwn2. Ya. Im attached. But so? He doesnt matter. And i know my limits uh. Hmm. Fine lor. If thats want abg wawal want. The promise we made will soon be left unsaid. Again. Grr. But tt night, dada cried. Tsk. Tsk. Maybe pms uh. Haha. But i meant it laa. Sometimes i dun like my life. . . . Full of challenges. Im still young. N i can take all these challeneges. I nid someone to hold me back. Now i tink abg wawal is okay from the outbreak. And sadly, it passes down to me. Im so fragile now. Grr.. How strong i tried to be, i failed. For this matter, i tink i nid abg wawal's help. But never will i tell him. No!!!! So i will stand on my feet again. Fer the i dunnoe how many time. So i feel like its the N level period last year. How bad can i feel. Argh! Those tymzz... I wish that i never come across all this at the 1st place. )): The best thing is that i wish my skewl is an all girls skewl. Hee. So, i dun get mix up with the boys. And my feelings wun be entangled to such state. Emotionally, im unstable. )): ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



hello u. how was the rest? u made it thru, but nevertheless. i got u out on a wire. u be love and i`ll be a liar. okay. hello bloggie. i don`t know why but i`m feeling so damn lethargic today. darn it. can`t study. always feel like dozing off. zZzZ. anyways. supposedly go out study with dada but hmmm. dada, u must be enjoying urself right now while i`m rotting at home. i managed to escape my madrasah`s exam. fooh. teacher didn`t call me. ouhh well. dada, do u wanna like study in school tmr? after we finish our paper, we go home and take a nap, rest and bla bla then we go back to school and study til 6++ or 7? want want? and mst be serious studying okay? i think we end pretty early tmr right? so we can have plenty of rest til noon maybe? i`m just giving suggestions. +smiless+ "why so long nvr msg?" darn it. i was waiting for ur msg. but nvm it`s okay. i still miss u. wakaka. well. for now that is. for how long it will last? onlyGodknowswhen. yeah yeah. i`m so fcuking tired but seriously i didn`t even get out from the house and the couch. being a couch potato for a day is what i am today. i feel like eating seoul garden. and hell yes. i`ve been saying that for the past few months! dada, would u like to treat me to there? hehe. shameless shithead. how come today no one msg me asking to go out. arg. so people must be prolly studying and cracking their brains to memorise all nonsensical social studies facts! well HAHA. while u people are studying, i`m entertaining my freaking self with shits and craps. so very horribly definitely positively undoubtedly hellish freaking indeed bored. argh. okay quit whining faddie. no one`s here to humour me today. owh. so sad. somebody, please, anybody, just shoot me. bang bang my baby shot me down

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, May 06, 2006


wei. shithead. i miss uu larh. how come u never msg me?! grr. yeahh. in silence, i miss uu. but u don`t know anything. poor me. but nvm. i need to step up and be strong. so don`t patronize me. ohh yeahh. i`m having a break from karaoke. yeahh. karaoke. my mum`s friends are all here. celebrating mothers` day in advance. their characters are like us. yeahh. like secondary students. alar. that`s only when they meet each other. they`ll forget everyone else. seriously. kaylar. yeahh. i wish i could play pool too. but can`t. time doesn`t permit me. anyway. i had actually came up with an evil plan. "can i go meet my friend and pass my book to her?" so with that reason, maybe i could meet up dada for a game or two of pool. but nahh. lying is a sin. but hey! sin can be frogiven rightt? but still. . nahh. okay wait look. monday will be social studies. and great! i can`t possibly read the whole of sec 3 and 4 work in just like one night? screw uu larh! i`m so not prepared. last resort is. . . kay don`t even think about it. ohh yeahh. how come when i tried to log in msn just now, it wrote something like 'currently u don`t have any contacts. click here to add' seriously. i`m not joking. then i don`t dare log in anymore. all that singing is making me thristy. but but. if it rains, i`m sorry okay? esp to dada. who`ll be going to chalet later. hehe. take care okay dear. how bout on monday? a game of pool? lol. plan only. but scared laaa exams. hey uu. i miss uu. but what the heck. don`t bother. just a feeling of sorrow. sorrow my foot larh! oh-oh! it`s raining.

the beauty exposed ;



Toodles. Weekend is here again. OHh. How fast has the days passed. Hey faddie. Its ben long since u write an entry. And yes. U wrote one yesterday.((: Hey. It doesnt matter okay how long i wrote. Hmph. Nyeyeye. Bluek! Hakz. Guess wat. Yesterday i slept the whole day. After i blog, i went to my lala land. Met a few of my friends there. Quite a number laa. Dada was waiting fer a msg from either my swit<3s. But neither msg me. Hmph. Its gone case to abg wawal. Grr. Its nearing to his bdae. Hapi Bdae okay? I dunnoe if i want to celebrate with him tis Mondae ke tak. Err. I want laa. But the other alternative is that i want him to feel. How -i dunnoe wat the word is- it is if u want someone to celebrate ur birthdae but ended up tt person is not dere on ur special date... Cause i felt tt wae on my 16th bdae. Grr. That feeling is the worst. So tmr is Sundae huh? Maybe im mitting abg wawal. Together with my ibu. She wants to have a reunion with abg wawal lor cum celebrating his bdae. Grr. I tink she misses him. What the hell. So dada lazy laa want to tell him the time and vemue. There's always tml rite? And he wun die if he never ggets a call from me. Life still goes on. Watever- So. Dearest sayang havent call ever since 8723917314 minutes back. Nahh. Takpelaa. I should be understanding enuf rite. And so. Let me express my missingNess to dear blog since i cant tell sayang dearest okay? Hakz. Lamest of dada huh. Okay. Ya so. I admit my miss to dearest sayang. But takpe k dada. Smile. Remember. He`ll be back soon. Yea. Because of these i hate weekends. To a certain extend. I want to see sayang. I miss my sayang. I want him to make me smile. Pls. Pls. I want all tt. Missing him laa.. I want to smell him. Effing nice laa.. Grr.. His hair. Cute. Cute. Wei. Takmu prasan k my dear if u read tis. Hakz. Anw, i am much more cuter. Bluek! Sayang dearest cant be puji. Later kembang. Then will trouble me as i have to send him to KEmbangan. Lame laa sya. Da laa. dada got nothing more to wrte. Im going out. Later at night im going chalet. So nid to go out dulu okay. So faddie. Enjoy urself okay? Miss eu. I wish we cld play pool. But cant. See laa. Mybe at night i play pool. Yippee. Pook addict. Not really laa. I nid to do sth to past tym. Grr. Cant study. Strez laa.. Okay freaking miss sayang dearest........ Boohoo. N boo hoo to abg wawal to. Bluek uh! Toodles- ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, May 05, 2006


fooh. it`s been long since my last entry. okay. i`m glad that malay and english is over. the paper was complex. so many "explain" kinda questions. anyway, i have been sleeping during my exams. how much worse can i be? i mean like when my mouth is shut, i`ll get mondaine and when i`m mondaine, i`ll get dozy and when i`m dozy, i slumber. that`s what exactly happened for the past two consecutive days. i`m only awake when i manage to attract someone`s attention and smile and whisper to. okay. malay paper was OKAY. but NOT easy. english was complicating. arg. i always lose my concentration when i`m sleepy. any suggestions on how to stop this bad habit of mine? S.O.S!! okay. so on monday, went study at elias mall with dada. i think she has already written a long entry about that. she`s always writting LONG entries. i think u speak more that 50 000 words per day. yeahh. that`s a fact. undenial. yeap yeap. sorry okay daa for the hotdogs. lol! nvm. then went to meet himm! alarr. had our late dinner only. had fun! but he always mock at me. grr. and yeapp. he sent me home. home sweet home. (",) okay. i`m currently feeling imflamed towards u pathetic fellows. i mean i have nothing to do with him okay. and the rumours are like in lys and dss. waliao ehk. u people are such a freak. i am so freaking pissed. he is just a friend. nothing more. [[fyi. this him is not the him whom sent me home]] but it`s okay. i know i didn`t do anything so i`ll just sit here and collect all my pahala[what`s the word in english?] okay nvm. accuse anyhow only. my blood`s boiling. ARG. bunch of fcukers. but nvm nvm. i`m cool. +meditate+ can today be like last week? when we hogged on the phone till almost 4 am? please please please. and yarhh. they`re back together. Alhamdulillah. Thank God. tmr there will be an advanced mothers` day celebration. my ibu dearest and her secondary school friends. goshh. imagine how long have they been together. i hope we can be like them right dada? Insyallah. i soo wanna go out but can`t. wait till exams are done. not mid year. but O levels. grr. going to school by bus is not bad after all. heh. but how come i never bump into dada? hmmm. kaylar. wish u both all the best okay. u both seem happy together. and if i were to follow u, hmmm. wait for another month or so before i click can? now i have no mood for anything laa. something`s playing around with my mind. surprisingly, today`s entry is long. is it? now i`m frustrated. i have friend request and i bloody cannot accept. freak. dadaa, enjoy urself at the chalet okay?! and yeahh. i`m skipping madrasah this sunday. i haven`t memorise a single line. so i escape larh. if teacher call, i give a very sick voice. wish me luck. naughty fafad. kaylar i need to deposit money inside bank!! tata- tC people. . . gd nite de angel from my nightmare :). . [[copyright okay!]]

the beauty exposed ;



Oh well. Its the end of my ENGLISH paper. Uh freak! It was hard lor. And i mean it. Grr. I did something about TRAVEL. 15 minutes before exam end, then i start on my compo. Grr. There's no tym! Practically no tym lor. And im soo fess up. Hey. Sori to hu ever that smiled to me during recess okay? Haha. Got no mood to smile. So i jeling everyone. Oopz.. Ampun kan patik ya? So i bored. Now- Im rotting myself at home laa. Nak klua. Tapi ngan saper yah? Uh shit la. So i went to mall just now. Fun. Fun. ((: After sooo long since i went there. I bought earpiece. Bubbye $19.90. Hakz. And hey i cut my hair. Again. Tis month, im experimenting my hair laa.. Boo hoo. I like it now. ((: Bubbye to my DRY hair. Eww.. So now im at home. Leceh man. Layan my ayah ye karenah. Grr. So i got chalet tis weekend. Yippee.. Start today till monday. Got swimming pool. Shiok. Shiok. I shall go dere. See laa. But im busy. Anw. Got my minah cousin. Ewww!! ((: Anw. Let me tok about yesterdae. Didnt get the chance to blog about yesterday kan. Kan. 04 May 2006 / Thursday It was fun. Fun. I love it. Yesrteday, syasya go study with faddie. But syasya ajak sayang dearest. I tot he wun go. Dada ajak je sei. Well, at 1st, there were oni me and faddie. Studying at tamp lib. Soo noisy. Then later sayang dearest came around 4 plus. Suprise. Suprise. ((: Actually, me and faddie wanted to eat BK. Skali he came. So i cancel. Sori ehk fafad? And thx okay. I have such wonderFOOL fren. Hehex. Jk. But ard 5 faddie got tuition. So fast. And hey. Tok uh with him. Hehez. Remember u loike him last tym..? I mean crush. Dulu. So good wat get to tok to him live. Fun laa dier. Dun wori he tak makan orang. Step malu2 jek. I noe u not lyk hu i noe fadiah is wen he`s around. Hmph!! Aper sei. Next tym tok tok okay? Wat i noe, he same same as us. Giler giler. Yeah. Do eu noe tt sometimes its hard fer me to be in tt situation where i nid to layan everybody. Hard sei. Tts 2 be urself better kan..? I hope u n him can be rapat2. Remember like me, eu and abg wawal? Kan fun? Dulu last tym, we 3 everytym together. Kan. Kan. Ish. Sya! Stop comparing okay? Sori-- So after fadddie left. Its down to two. Left us. But miss faddie lor. ((: No her. Ill get bored. Rite. Hee. So. AFTer 6 daez den we meet again. Yeah. Dada soo miss dier. I loike. I loike. But oni wen kite klua jek fun. If tak. Not fun. But hey dada njoy okay. I love tt part wen kite read story book. "Wen i miss you, i noe that u will be back." And hey sayang dearest label me tikus. Because the character in the book. Ntah ehk y he called me tt. Takpe laa.. Anw hes oik. Oik. ((: The pearl sharing was fun too. I soo miss him. I miss him. ANd hey. "Do you love me forever and ever and always?" The quote was extracted from the book we read. "How am i special?" Keke. Im sori k eu. Wen at 1st skali u said i love eu forever and ever and always to me, and i said watever uh. Tak percaye. Sori k. I tak meant tt wae. Its like a flashback to me. Dada taknak make any promises laa now. Cause dada noe that maybe some dae we wun be together again. Never noe kan. But i dun wan tt to happen laa. Once syasya adapt to tt person, its hard fer me to re-adapt to yang lain. Eww.. Pls lor. Syasya hate changes. And dada hope kite will be hapi okay? Yeye. So far dada and sayang dearest lom gadoh. And i dun want it to happen. Insya-Allah. And hey. I meant wat i sae okay. . U noe wat i meant. Okay laa. Enuf about yesterday.. So now dada miss sayang dearest. I miss him. I hope he is studying and not playing game.((: Good luck k fer ur A maths paper. Klaa. Syasya nk do my stuffs.. Zzzzzz. Im tired. Missing my sayang dearest loads!!!!!! Love eu darlynk. Miss my abg wawal pn. Aik. And hey. ABg wawal never kol me. Never msg me. Grr. Fine uh. Im a lil bit angry at him. Ohh. If i never find eu. Eu wun find me uh? Okay lor. I wun find eu already okay. Its better kan. So we tak gadoh. Grr.. Gini ye abg pn ade. Takpe laa. Everytym kite lost contact fer few daes after he open skewl. Grr. ANd im not ur scapegoat laa.. Watever uh eu. Anw, Hapi Advanced Bdae okay? Blablabla.. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Tuesday, May 02, 2006


This is my confessions- Todae is tuesday. Schooling. And syasya ran 2.4km todae. Yeye i managed to clock 12:46. ((: Tiring though. At recess, i saw sayng dearest. Cut his queue. Haha. Smell him. Nice. Nice. I loike. ((: Tok to him. Laugh. Laugh. Shiok. Miss dier uh freaK! Anw, lucky i was not late fer skewl. I was selekeh lor. Hair messy. Shict untucked. Skali. Sayang dearest was behind me. Malu. Oh shit! Grrr.. Get to see him though.((: Oh ya. Sya studied in lib after skewl. I did have a nice tok with faddie. After soo long being kept within me. At last it has been told. I feel much much better. Though im guilty to tell my private life to sum1. But syasya tak lei take it any longer. )): I may look happy, cheerful and stuffs. But do not be deceived by my cheerfulness. I just do not want to trouble pple. And dun want pple to noe my pathetic story. )): Thx k faaddie. I almost break down just now. Tsk. Tsk. Thinking about MY new life. Tsk. Tsk.
Okay. Tis entry will be long. But syasya reall feel bad. Sad cum watever laa..
But dada admitted tt im strong now. Unlike in the past. I dont loike my life now. )):
Sometimes. Retributions do happened. I believed in tt. Cause i am the victim of retribution at tis point if time in ma lyf. Let me tok about my relationship with sum1. Hmm. Asal ehk. We are not like other pple. Contact pn not cam matair. Bebual ble kite together aje shiok. Most of the time, we tak kluar. Da laa. Syasya tak nk sae byk byk, If he were to come across tis blog, he will feel bad. And i dun wan to be the cause of it. Sori okay. And fad. Tell me. How should i overcome tis. Ya. I find it immature. But. But. Wat am i to do. Grr. I hate them. I hate them. So influential. Hes a good boi. I noe. I tink. Matair mane tak rase disturbed sei. )): Im sad laa having to lead my life with tis. I dont want to put an end to it. No! We tak buat any wrongs. We tak pernah gaduh. Till now laa. Everytym. Hapi. Hapi. But syasya just hope some of the things can change sei. Its not fair. Not fair. I learnt from my mistakes. ASal kene balek kat syasya. )): Okay im complaining about my life. But i dun want tis retribution. ANd syasya tak salah kan die. But i dun wan sei kite prolong like tis.. Grr. Its like. Im the alwaes one yang have to wait. I got patience too... )): But syasya admit tt im soo HAPI wen he bside me. Fun. Super fun. But if hes not. Its like. I dont noe him. He dont noe me. Da laa. Freak laa. Watever it is, syasya still love him. Syasya still miss him. Hes still my sayang dearest. No high hopes. But dere is still hopes. I hope tt kite will be fine. No. WE are fine. But ntah laa.. Hard to explain.
Syasya feell soooo dissapointed.
If not, he msged fad to ask me if i want to go study not.
I told him laa my whereabouts.
And ajak him studied together.
Da hapi. Hapi.
Tot can study together.
Skali last minute he said he cant.
Slalu. Last minute. Cancel.
Hopes been lifted. But crashed in a minute.
Argh! Hate tt feelling.
Sya hate it.
Mean it uh if u said it.
Not being demanding.
But sya dissapointed.
Not once. Twice. Ntah ehk bape kali. )):
And sya got tis feeling.
I shared tis with fad.
Sometimes. I feel its unfair.
Maybe he oni cari me wen his fwens all got plans.
If they got no plans. he hangs ard with dem.
Soo i feel like being used.
They takde, find me, They ade, ferget me.
)):
Dunnoe y i feel tis wae.
Is it true? Hup not laa..
Not fai. Not fair.
To me, hes a priority. But i dun feel tt im being prioritised. )):
Well tts wat i felt.
Grr. I want him to feel how i felt now. Benn nearly 2 months maybe.
Sya suffer in silenced.
Fafad and abg wawal slalu kate im hapi.
Yea, im hapi. But my sadness. u all never see. )):
I cannot compare kan.
Abg wawal . sayang dearest.
Both are nice. Super nice. ((:
I do missssss the time wen syasya ngan abg wawal. Super miss.
Not the tym wen kwn. But being his gal. Tsk. Tsk. )':
Im sori k dearest sayang. I write wat i felt.
I still remember those moments wen kiter 24/7 together.
And i meant 24/7 sei. . . We oni separate ble nak balek. If not ll de wae together.
How i miss those time.
Sometimes,i regret. Y kite break. But no use crying over split milk.
Fer the 2nd tym, he asked fer it.
And syasya tak dare to fell the same wae again. Enuf all the pain.
I miss nurul. I miss the swimmimg outings.
I miss kak along. I miss kak ina. i miss abg FARID. I miss Cik Sal.
Though im not close with him. I find him the same as my abg nizam.
Tts y i feel abg farid is like my abg. But dream on okay.
I miss my abg nizam alot. Sobz.
See. Abg wawal. Noez everything.
Tapi kite terpisah. )':
"Bukan aku yang mengundangkan pertemuan." Blablabla.
Sad. Sad. But face it k sya.
He noes all my problems till now. That includes some of my family problems.
Hapi Advanced Bdae okay abg wawal?
And if eu read tis. Argh! Nothing laa.
Im listening to that bukan aku yg mengundang song. Sad.
Klaa. Watever. I just hope tt me and sayang dearest can change towards the better.
But i still love him. I still do.
Me and abg wawal is in the past.
But still sumwhere in my heart.
But ive accepted it.
Now= me and dearest sayang..
Okay laa. My irritating sis beside me.. Cb..!!Freaking shit uh she.
Nyenyenye. Babi. Memekak sak ye pompan!! Tata.
One dae i change the font colour okay. The sibuk gal is here..
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Cheese. Outdated uh. Yesterday, i cant continue blogging. My sis use the com till the wee hours. And now, syasya got no mood lei to tok bout yesterday. To wrap up. I just find pple at elias mall GATAL laa k. Guys are always the same. Right. Any1 hu has any objections, feel free to object okay. And i meant it. Guys will always be guys. Even if they are attached, they just have the habit to oogle at other gals. Y ehk.. Err!!! Watever laa.. So yesterdae. Fad njoyed herself. Good. ((: Yesterdae. Sya freaking MISS dearest bebeh like hell laa.. But no point laa missing him. What can sya get? Nothing. Perfectly nothing. *thinking* If he said he misses me, believe ke tak ehk? Most of the tym, sya believed. But wat if sya kene tpu sei? Hakz. )): But wat i noe. Sya freaking trust him laa.. If anything were to happen. The trust will be gone. Hup wun happen laa okay. So me and sayang tok on the phone yesterday. Best. Best. Cause i hell miss him seh. But my sis was aking to put down the phone. But b4 tt, dada tok to abg wawal. ((: Waited fer bestie call, but didnt receive anything. )): Stayed up late. Sayang dearest said he misses me. Yeye! True ke tak? But sya believes. ((: Abg wawal said he misses me too. )): But im sori okay. Just cant return tt feeling. Even syasya ader changed a bit. Deep down, sya admit im not sum1 hu is 'tak setia'. Haha. Eww!! But frankly wat. Syasya tak sanggup uh nk hurt sayang bebeh. )): Though there are still sum feelings i hide. Let it remain as it be. Rather than to be revealed. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Monday, May 01, 2006


Holla ho. Dada just came back from studying. And i meant studying okay. ((: Dada went with faddie. Study at Elias Mall's Mc. Made oursekves comfortable. Except fer the staffs who oogled at us. Aww how irritating. And there's these delivery MEN smiled at me. Eww. So old yet want to gatal. Pls lor. I tink hes about 20 plus ehk. Me and fafad's heart was beating soo fast. Thx fer lending me ur earpiece okay? Wen otw to bustop. Dada was making some noise and fafad joined me. It was echoing. And at first i didnt noe thre was a gut behind us. Skali he was like looking. My gawd. Malu..! Mak kpo sak my sis. Cb. Continue later. Want to ask com tak tau mintak baik baik kape? So much fer being smart.. Ass! ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss hin. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss hm. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Dada miss him. Loads lor! Kwang kwang kwang. ): How i wish FRIDAY would be everydae..!! Kekeke. Tts soo impossible. Wish oni what. Okay laaa. Tata. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him . Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him. Syasya miss him damn freaking loads. Take care sayang dearest.
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Hooray. Today is public holiday for all. So that means school are closed today. Yippee! So fafad. Do eu want to go study tooday? Make it at BK can? Downtown. I have not started my revision. Scared liao. Then, if i got money, we play 1 or 2 hours of pool. Want? Want? Keke. I hope i can get to see Ali today to redeem my card. So are eu on? Call me okay. Eh no. I call eu later laa. Hey. Dun wori okay? Smile. SMile. They will be okay. Thats parts and parcel of their [life] Cant be 24/7 happi je kan? Tis is their rough patch. So wat eu can do is. Try consoling them okay. Takee care den. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Had been burning my weekend. Oh gosh. I dont even have tym to study. Yesterday. Supposed to go dinner with my mom and abg wawal. But it was cancelled. My mom wanted to bring him to dinner when it is nearing to his birthdae. WEi! Not fair. Hmph. But its okay. Ya. Sometimes, my mom still do asked about abg wawal kiter. But i dunnnoe ehk if she knew that me and him are just friends. I knew that my mom kindda close with him. A lil bit. At times uh. And she's adapted to him. Anw, he knew all of my aunties and uncles, cousins, beside my mom. Tts a whole lotsa fun. But nah i ts okay. Ended up, dada went to marine parade. We went to play pool. It was. Brr. Cold. And i like that moment when i played. Macam bagus gitu. Kakaka. ((: But still lose to him uh. We played 7 games within 1 hour. Good. Good. Shall play again next tym. After tt, went to eat yong tau fu. LOng tym never eat ehk. Saw pearlene. Halo gal! Ali. Ali! Can i have my prepaid back? Pls. Pls. Ade ke die kate. Sya u want to top up kan? Y not u go buy new sim card and give me the new card. Cantik muke. Hahaa. Jk. Oh yaa. Thx ehk. U go register fer me the card though i wanted sooo much to use my name. Hmph. Takpe laa. So yesterdae, i was shocked to get a phone call from ALi. At 11 pluss. Fuh. Lucky it was me hu pick it up. We hogged till nearing 1 hour i guess. Then said im off to bed. ((: Den i went to cut my hair. Oh well. It doesnt look any diff lor. And it cost $22 bucks. Robbery in the night. Hmph. STupid gayz. Wun go to ur saloon animore. Bluek! So lousy. Wasted my money and yet im NOT satisfied with my haircut. Grr! Now, syasya broke liao. Left about 5 bucks. How to go out. Okay. Im out in the evening. And i dunnoe if i have received a call from sayang dearest. I miss him loads lor. But shh, its okay. Tts about yesterday. . . ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Sunday, April 30, 2006


i love my past 2 saturadays`!! i like i like. how i wish every saturday will be like that. FAT hope. okay whatever. i slept late yesterday at around 3 cos we hogged on the phone. nice conversation. full of laughter. shiok!!! got excited to tell dada about what happened. so the first thing i did when i woke up was not to check the time. but called dada instead. okay next topic. on the other hand, i`m feeling both sad and "depressed" i think dada knows why. right right? they`re still no on talking terms. urgh. dada, pray for me that they will be back to normal? thankew thankew. now i`m feeling superb hungry. my stomach is already making this hardcore 'metal' song. where`s my mum? she ain`t home. i`m hungry. ohh yeahh. tmr no school. so i hope i cna fulfill that one day with studying? i burn my saturdays and sundays just like that. idah[[haha!]] if u can go out tmr, holla me okay. FREE. k laa i wanna make up my room. tata- ps. i love yesterday.

the beauty exposed ;



Syasya just woke up at 10 am. Im sleepy. But eyes awake. So anw. Planned to study late at nite yesterdae but ended up sleeping all the way till dawn. So today. I nid to finish up my geography notes. Must. Must. Hup so. And read up a lil of malay and english. But like as if i got the time. After tt, practice MATHS. Been ages since i practicce maths on my own. The last tym was on JANUARY? Hee. And yah. I nid to start praying. So long tak pray. Hmm. Maybe ok. ((:
After i woke up, the first thing i did was to check my HAIR. Ahahakz. Bluek. Tried calling abg wawal once but he tak pick up. Wanted to call dearest sayang but syasya scared. Its okaylaa.. So todae my ibu wanted to ajak abg wawal go makan. But i have yet to tell him. 8 more days to his birthdae. ((: HAPPI ADVANCED BDAE OKAY? *winks*
I need to cut my hair!!! Heee. Later must ask ayah money. Kakaka. Too many money laa i spent. Okay laa. Must cut short. No tym to blog. Nid to do my stuffss. Okaylaa. Faddie bestie take care okay? Dun worry. Everything will be just fine.. Smile. ((:
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Saturday, April 29, 2006


I just reached home todae. Tired. Came back from library. Intention was to study. But my eyes are too tired. Therefore, syasya arent able to absorb thgs i read. Duh- Hell. So. todae. Syasya wentt to REBOND my partly hair. ((: Bubbye money. Keke. Ya. early morning wakie wakie. Syasya went to skewl. Hmph i tot i was late. And 7 bucks fly away to the cab. Syasya went to malay remedial. My real intention was to see dearest sayang. Hakz. ((: Hey. Get to c him okay. And even tok tok, smile smile. He said he missses me. Bluek. Oh yah eu. Im listening attentively to teacher yet eu made me smile. Hmmph. Box eu. Kekeke. ((: jk yah bebeh.
So after tt, heed to raffles place. I was sleepy at dere too.. AS usual- ((: Auty hu does my hair funny laaa.. Thx ya aunty. ((: Much appreciated. After tt, went back to tampines. Eat BK. Thx yah fad. Oh b4 tt, wen we are otw to RP, syasya listen to mp3. > Kembalilah kasih kepada diriku. Hidupku sepi tanpa kehadirhan mu. Tt song uh. One of a few tt abg wawal dedicated to me. Suddenly, i feel all sad. I was silenced fer a moment. Nice wordings uh. Nostalgic. )): But. But. Wat to do.Its been long laa since i tune into tt folder tt abg wawal created fer me in my mp3. Listening to them all makes me feel so jiwang-jiwang. And i dun want the past to affect me...
Cherish the present kan...
((: Past is NOT equal to the future.
And so. i was okay after tt. [Cont] Yah syasya saw taufik and a gal. Wah. Takkan he likes tt gerl ehk? Sori uh. But she? Okay. Pple have diff taste. But saufi? Hakz. If i were the girl, i definitely choose taufik kan. Hehehe..But IF oni. Lucky im not tt gal. Coz syasya got my dearest sayang now with me. I just love him. And not love him fer some crap pool foul balls. Hehe. If dearest sayang read tis, he will undestand yah. Okay. Okay. But i still do keep my promise okay.:
Back to my story.Saw a lot of pple todae. Faddie bestie saw the most. And it was fun. Actually. I figured out tt, outing will be fun if somewhere during tt outing we saw different of our friends and exchanging smiles and hellos. More friends bump, the fun it gets. Rite bestie?
And while me was waiting fafad bestie order food, suddenly abg wawal sergah me. Fuh. Tt scare me. Coincidence. He said asri saw me. And hence he went down to look fer me jap. We talked fer a while. And he played pool. Wah! Abg wawal kiter main pool sei. Terkejot tapi benar sik. Yaya. Kate jek syahidah hav changed. Salah campr and stufs. Kaki main pool and stufss. Yang dier pn aper.Kater takkan jejeak kaki pat places lyk tis. Parents wun allow and like it laa... Wat crap. Okay laa.
After tt, went to library. Syasya tertdo-tdo in dere. Ard 6:40 go home. And now. Syasya nk slp! Too tired. Nid to wakie-wakie to study later at night. Hope soo.
And so. I miss my dearest sayang. I wish yesterdae wld be todae. And today wil be forever. Kan? I want to spend some of my time with dearest sayang. But it is impossible. We are busy people. Studies and stuffs really held us back. The rules we have to abide. Priority fer others. Blablabla. But neh mind. I shall allow myself to spend tym with dearest sayang in my LALA land. Nobody will disturb me. Hmph. Not a single soul. Reality cant get it. Its okay.
Cause ive adapted and are still adapting to it.
So long as he love me. Hakz. Till wen? I dunnoe.
Tts y syasya alwaez emphasize on cherishing these present tym. But hey. Let me share tis with dear blog. Syasya just feel kan me and sayang dearest cant be together fer tt long till so long. Tt feeling hunts me. But still i do love himm laa. Lyk duh.. And tts one of the reasons y syasya NEVER put high hopes on tis relationship. I noe. Im different. The way syasya treats sayang dearest is lain compared to my previous relationship. Hmm. Sometyms, i myself feels complicated. Faddie bestie pn said so.
But y. Y? So watever it is, Cherish lyf. No high hopes to be lifted. Cause once eu jatuh it hurts. FEelings will be affected. Life will be deteriorated. Till i dunoe wen. I just dun wan history to happen again. How i wish. But tis are dugaan of life... Kwang kwang kwang-
I pray fervently tt my journey of life will turn out well. Fer now. I just want to study hard and make my ayah and ibu proud of me lyk how my sis did. If she can, i can too kan? I hope. Pray fer the best for me okay? Thx.
May ALLAH bless me. ((: And also my dearest bestie, sayang dearest, abg wawal kiter, all my friends, family and everbody.
B4 tt. anoder 9 more daes to abg wawal kiter ye bdae yang ke 17. Da besar sei. I see eu grow fer 2 years. ((: HAPPIE ADVANCED BDAE OKAY?
Silenced fer now. Syasya wanna slp now laa. Tired daa. Tried caling fafad bestie but she tak pick up. Free pn taknk angkat. Hehehe- Bluek!
``Tata-
``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Okay fad. Guei tuey pui chi. If i never call eu. Im too tired uh. Super tired. Not energy to tok otp. Sorri. Sorri. So meet eu tml okay? Hugs! Tata. Soli. SOli. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Time shows 12:40am. My eyelid is heavy. I am sooo tired. Abg wawal has just called me. Dada is BAD. Dada shouted at abg wawal. No. No. Raised my voice. Dada soo guilty.
I am truly sorry okay abg wawal?
Hmm. I wonder. Y do eu still miss me. Y do eu still <3> I guess tis point of tym, syasya feels double special. Hmm. Maybe the fact that abg wawal still treat me nice. Lalala. Thx k? But until when. Soon, i have to part with him. I shall wait fer that vey moment comes when hes attracted to sb. Hmm.No. I dont want that to happen. Okay tts very SELFISH of syasya. Whaever it is, syasya dont want him to forget me. Okay.
Im sorry cause i raised my voice alright.
Actually. I was irritated cause the conversation consist of silence. Ouhhh. How bored can that be? I cant adapt to such surroundings ya noe? Next, u like to panjang lebarkan story uh. Aww.. How menyeyeh. Okay stop here laa.. Syasya promise syasya wil be a good girl. Promise. Nitez. ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;

Friday, April 28, 2006


Samekom awak. Ive reached home from my outing with dearest sayang. Fuh. Wat short time we had. Hakz. *winks* It was fun. Get the feeling back once again. Oni today. The next one will be very unpredictable. We dont usually meet. Oni in school. Bored. I will miss him loads. Mani. Mani. And i will get affected sei. But syasya will learn slowly. SO we meet at 4. Hooray. Syasya was early. Im glad. ((: Kecoh-kecoh. Then guess wat he said. "Eu. But tis is the second time right u are earlier than me...." Cetot btol. Hmmph! Am i alwaez late. Kekeke. Soli. Soli. So i was waiting fer Ali. And he didnt turn up i assume. WAited fer him till 4:30 gtu. Den sya blah uh. I want my prepaid back. He never use. Might as well i use kan? Kan? So we heed to bedok fer pool. Hee. I was bad. I asked him. "Hey. Lets hit to downtown. Kwang3."((: So the day went very FUN. It was accompanied with laughters and disturbing and stuffs. Sya MISS him laaa... Hakz. Im lousy at pool. LAlala. And guess wat. SSyasya saw haskik, farhan, iskandar and asri at s.mac while waiting kan Ali. Oops. So cont. After tt makan at BK. It was pouring heavily after we settle down at Bk. Lucky us. Afteer that, took 17. All the way to paris. During the bus ride, i rested my head on his shoulder. Aww. Its been long. Long. Shh. I freaking miss that lor. Wee. Asking fer permission i still ask cume sometyms. NO most of the tym forgot. 2nd telecast. Den i ask. Well, he said. " Macam tak biase jek." Hmph.! Okay
i noe tt im dependent on pple's shoulder.
WEe. Tts me. *winks* Den after than jln2 thru townpark. ((: Hakz. Meet his frens. And den i heed to home. Reach ard 9:30. Just in tym. Phew. And too bad fer us, islin and ana saw me and dearest sayang at MC white sand. Alaaaa. Oklaa. Watever.((: So i did njoy my NIGHT STUDY lesson. Was fun.
Just dun want it to end.
Now. I freakingly miss dearest bebeh- We hog on the phone just now fer a while.((: Oh ya. Faddie Bestie- CONGRATS on getting a new phone. So. W800i. Welcome to the gang! ((: Nice phone- But tak jealous. Dun worrri. Tis is true. If i do i tell eu rite? Hakz.... Bluek. So now. I shall hop around fer hairstyles.. TATA- ``Syasya-

the beauty exposed ;



Okay. Syasya has to be suuper fast. Time shows 3 pm. And im going to meet dear Ali at 3:45. OhH. Am i late? Hakz. I was hogging on the phone with dearest sayang. Tts y. Y does the time not goes slowly. Hmmph. ((: Oh well. WE laugh just too many. Later cry. Okay it was fun talking to him. ((: So now. Im goona get change and meet my dearest bebeh. Aww. Its been soo long since i go out with eu. Miss the fun bebeh- Oh well. Haha. Now my adek is sitting beside me. OMG. And i am still blogging. Hakz. Im smart. Noe y? The font is now in white colour. Hahahaha. Oklaa. Cant wait to see bebeh. Miss eu laa.. Ok fad. U take care okay. Gonna miss eu. And im sori. I wun be able to go out with eu. Hee.Im outta with him. Tak mind kan? But i will still tink of eu and dearest abg wawal okay. U are my dearest still laa...